View Full Version : one million
denny
07-18-2003, 06:55 PM
9750
denny
07-18-2003, 06:59 PM
9751
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:11 PM
#9752
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:13 PM
#9753
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:14 PM
#9754
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:16 PM
#9755
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:17 PM
#9756
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:19 PM
#9757
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:47 PM
#9758
Sharni
07-18-2003, 07:59 PM
#9759
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:00 PM
#9760
denny
07-18-2003, 08:00 PM
9761
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:00 PM
#9762
denny
07-18-2003, 08:01 PM
9763
IAKaraokeGirl
07-18-2003, 08:09 PM
9764~Just wanted the chance to be underneath you, denny. ;)
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:11 PM
#9765
denny
07-18-2003, 08:13 PM
9765~Anytime, IAK!
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:13 PM
#9767
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:14 PM
#9768
denny
07-18-2003, 08:14 PM
9768
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:15 PM
#9770
denny
07-18-2003, 08:15 PM
9770
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:16 PM
#9772
denny
07-18-2003, 08:17 PM
9773
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:17 PM
#9773
Eliza
07-18-2003, 08:17 PM
#9774
Sharni..once again your Legolas quote is dead on. Great quote!
denny
07-18-2003, 08:18 PM
9775
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:19 PM
OK... so, having time to burn before going out for a night cap... here are some facts about Elves ("borrowed" from http://www.geocities.com/jessie_216/11elfacts.html)..
--9777--
Elves are immortal and so do not phisically change, i.e their appearence.
denny
07-18-2003, 08:19 PM
9778
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:19 PM
Elves do not get weak as the get older, they only become wiser and beautiful.
--9779--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:20 PM
They are noble, elegant and quite tall.
--9780--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:20 PM
9780
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:20 PM
Elves are in danger of being a myth forever.
--9782--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:21 PM
Elves excel in speech, song and poetry.
--9783--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:21 PM
9783
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:22 PM
Elves were the first creatures on Earth to speak with their voices.
--9785--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:22 PM
9786
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:22 PM
They have very fair hair and fair skin, except for The Princess Arwen who has a very rare dark complexion.
--9787--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:23 PM
When in war elves can be killed by fire and steel, but are also known to be killed by grief.
--9788--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:23 PM
9789
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:23 PM
Elves are surrounded by the light of the glowing moon, Such as Queen Galadriel who is know as "the Lady Of The Light".
--9790--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:24 PM
Elves speak both Quinya and Sindarin , although Sindarin is more common than Quinya.
--9791--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:24 PM
9791
denny
07-18-2003, 08:25 PM
9793
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:25 PM
--9794--
OK... need to do a little more digging for stuff to post :p
denny
07-18-2003, 08:25 PM
9795
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:26 PM
--9796--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:26 PM
#9797
Thats Quenya not Quinya :D
denny
07-18-2003, 08:27 PM
9798
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:27 PM
hmm.... I think I will send the web page owner a correction ;)
--9799--
denny
07-18-2003, 08:28 PM
9800
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:29 PM
--9801--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:30 PM
--9802--
some tomato(e) facts I have randomly collected from the web...
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:31 PM
Tomato, the darling of the backyard gardener, the star of salads and spaghetti sauces, and now a possible weapon against cancer, was once considered poisonous fruit to be avoided.
--9803--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:32 PM
Botanically, tomatoes are a fruit. This is because, generally, a fruit is the edible part of the plant that contains the seeds, while a vegetable is the edible stems, leaves, and roots of the plant.
--9804--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:32 PM
The tomato, a relative of the deadly nightshade family of plants, was held in high suspicion after it was brought to Europe from Mexico in the 1500s. It was grown in Spain. In Italy it was not widely accepted as a mainstay of Italian food until 1800s.
--9805--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:34 PM
Now, more than 67 million tons of the smooth-skinned succulent fruit are grown worldwide each year. About nine million tons are grown commercially in the United States - and that doesn't count the millions of backyard gardeners who favor the tomato because it grows in a variety of soils and requires little skill.
--9806--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:35 PM
There are more than 4,000 varieties of tomatoes, ranging from the small, marble-size cherry tomato to the giant Ponderosa that can weigh more than 3 pounds. Most commercial tomatoes are processed into foods, including sauces, pasta, purees, ketchup, soups, and salsas.
--9807--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:37 PM
Lycopersicon lycopersicum is the scientific term for the common tomato.
--9808--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:38 PM
For best flavor, store tomatoes at room temperature. Most tomatoes sold in supermarkets are firm and not fully ripened. To speed up the ripening process, place tomatoes in a brown paper bag or fruit-ripening bowl. Refrigerate only if fully ripe, and then only for a few days.
--9809--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:38 PM
Tomatoes are rich in vitamins A and C and are a major source of lycopene - a compound that researchers think may help the body to combat cancer.
--9810--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:39 PM
California is the number two producer of fresh market tomatoes behind Florida. In 1999, California produced 950 million pounds of tomatoes.
--9811--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 08:40 PM
The word ketchup is derived from the Chinese ke-tsiap, a pickled fish sauce. It made its way to Malaysia where it became kechap and ketjap in Indonesia. F. & J. Heinz Company began selling tomato ketchup in 1876.
--9812--
and that does it for me this evening... exit stage left even....
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:57 PM
#9813
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:58 PM
#9814
Sharni
07-18-2003, 08:59 PM
#9815
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:00 PM
#9816
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:01 PM
#9817
Bilbo
07-18-2003, 09:01 PM
9818
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:01 PM
#9819
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:04 PM
#9820
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:04 PM
#9821
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:06 PM
#9822
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:09 PM
#9823
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:12 PM
#9824
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:13 PM
#9825
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:14 PM
#9826
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:16 PM
#9827
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:19 PM
#9828
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:20 PM
#9829
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:21 PM
#9830
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:22 PM
#9831
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:23 PM
#9832
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:24 PM
#9833
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:25 PM
#9834
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:26 PM
#9835
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:27 PM
#9836
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:29 PM
#9837
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:29 PM
#9838
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:38 PM
#9839
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:40 PM
#9840
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:40 PM
#9841
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:41 PM
#9842
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:42 PM
#9843
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:43 PM
#9844
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:44 PM
#9845
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:44 PM
#9846
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:45 PM
#9847
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:46 PM
#9848
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:46 PM
#9849
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:48 PM
#9850
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:48 PM
#9851
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:49 PM
#9852
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:51 PM
#9853
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:52 PM
#9854
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:52 PM
#9855
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:53 PM
#9856
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:54 PM
#9857
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:55 PM
#9858
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:56 PM
#9859
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:57 PM
#9860
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:57 PM
#9861
Sharni
07-18-2003, 09:59 PM
#9862
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:03 PM
#9863
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:04 PM
#9864
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:06 PM
#9865
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:07 PM
#9866
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:10 PM
#9867
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:14 PM
#9868
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:15 PM
#9869
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:16 PM
#9870
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:21 PM
#9871
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:23 PM
#9872
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:25 PM
#9873
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:26 PM
#9874
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:27 PM
#9875
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:27 PM
#9876
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:28 PM
#9877
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:29 PM
#9878
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:29 PM
#9879
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:30 PM
#9880
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:31 PM
#9881
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:35 PM
#9882
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:36 PM
#9883
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:36 PM
#9884
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:37 PM
#9885
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:38 PM
#9886
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:39 PM
#9887
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:40 PM
#9888
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:41 PM
#9889
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:41 PM
#9890
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:42 PM
#9891
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:44 PM
#9892
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:45 PM
#9893
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:46 PM
#9894
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:47 PM
#9895
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:48 PM
#9896
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:49 PM
#9897
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:51 PM
#9898
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:52 PM
#9899
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:53 PM
#9900
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:54 PM
#9901
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:55 PM
#9902
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:56 PM
#9903
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:57 PM
#9904
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:58 PM
#9905
Sharni
07-18-2003, 10:59 PM
#9906
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:02 PM
#9907
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:08 PM
#9908
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:10 PM
#9909
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:11 PM
#9910
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:12 PM
#9911
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:13 PM
#9912
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:14 PM
9913
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:15 PM
9914
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:16 PM
9915
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:17 PM
If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
The swallow.
--9916--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:19 PM
How do you annoy your girlfriend during sex?
Phone her.
--9917--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:19 PM
Why do women fake orgasms?
Because they think men care. :D
--9918--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:20 PM
Why does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle?
She knows she's given her last blow job.
--9919--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:21 PM
Q: Why did Al Gore get a nipple ring?
A: He heard that George Bush got a Dick Cheney.
--9920--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:21 PM
Q. Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?
A. Because it tasted better than Adam's banana.
--9921--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:22 PM
Q: What's the difference between a beer and a booger?
A: A beer goes on the table, a booger goes under it.
--9922--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:23 PM
Q: What do you get when you cross a cock with a telephone pole?
A: A 10 ft cock reaching out to touch someone!
--9923--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:24 PM
Q: Why do hippos shag underwater?
A: You try keeping a 9lb clitoris wet
--9924--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:24 PM
Q: How do you cancel a appointment at a sperm bank ?
A: Tell them you can't cum.
--9925--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:25 PM
Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm trees?
A: Hold on your nuts boys this aint no ordinary blow job!!
--9926--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:25 PM
Celine Dion walked into a bar. "Why the long face?" said the bartender.
--9927--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:26 PM
A guy walked into a bar and ordered a double scotch, bourbon on the rocks and a triple vodka. He said to the bartender: "I shouldn't be drinking this with what I've got." "Why, what have you got?" Thirty cents."
--9928--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:27 PM
A smartly dressed man entered a plush Manhattan bar and took a seat. The bartender came over and asked: "What can I get you to drink, sir?""Nothing, thank you," replied the man. "I tried alcohol once but I didn't like it,and I haven't drunk it since." The bartender was a little perplexed but being a friendly, outgoing sort, he pulled out some cigarettes from his pocket, flipped the top of the pack and offered one to the man. But the man refused, saying: "I tried smoking once, didn't like it, and I have never smoked since. Look, actually, I wouldn't be in here at all, except that I'm waiting for my son." To which the bartender said: "Your only child, I presume?"
--9929--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:28 PM
Q. What do you call the sweat produced when two rednecks are having sex?
A. Relative humidity.
--9930--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:28 PM
Q: What's the difference between Virginia and West Virginia?
A: In Virginia, Moosehead is a beer. In West Virginia, it's a misdemeanor.
--9931--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:28 PM
#9932
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:29 PM
Q: How does a woman scare a gynaecologist?
A: By becoming a ventriloquist!
--9933--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:30 PM
Q: Why was the young man upset when he got a sweater for Christmas?
A: He was hoping for a screamer or a moaner.
--9934--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:30 PM
Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
A: A wet nose.
--9935--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:31 PM
#9936
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:31 PM
Q: What's the difference between a penis and a prick?
A: A penis is fun, sexy and satisfying... A prick is the guy who owns it.
--9937--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:31 PM
Q. What do a farmer and a pimp have in common?
A. Both need a hoe to stay in business.
--9938--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:32 PM
Q: What do you call an eighty year old impotent sailor?
A: A salt with a dead weapon.
--9939--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:33 PM
Q. Why did god make pubic hairs curly?
A. If they were straight they would poke your eyes out!
--9940--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:33 PM
Q: What do you call a dwarf eskimo with a hard-on?
A: Frigid Midget With A Rigid Digit!
--9941--
mindboxer505
07-18-2003, 11:34 PM
9933
banging bitch betty brazenly beside bonny's beachhouse broke bill's boner beyond bandaging
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:34 PM
#9943
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:34 PM
Q: What do you get when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over?
A: Dough Nuts!
--9944--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:35 PM
The Answer: A Cockrobin.
The Question: what are you putting in my mouth, Batman?
--9945--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:35 PM
#9946
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:35 PM
Q: How do you circumcise a whale?
A: You send down four-skin divers.
--9947--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:36 PM
Q: Did you hear about the 13 year old boy that got hold of his fathers' Viagra?
A: They rushed him to the hospital with 3rd degree burns on his hands.
--9948--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:36 PM
#9949
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:37 PM
A man went into a bar and ordered a succession of Martinis. After each one, he removed the olive and put it into a jar. After two hours, the bartender felt compelled to ask: "Why do you keep doing that?" "Because," slurred the man, "my wife sent me out for a jar of olives."
--9950--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:37 PM
A man walked into a bar with a piece of tarmac under his arm. He said: "I'll have a beer please, and one for the road."
--9951--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:37 PM
#9952
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:38 PM
Two hamburgers walked into a bar. The bartender said: "Sorry, we don't serve food."
--9953--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:38 PM
#9954
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:39 PM
--9955--
need to go find some more material....
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:39 PM
#9956
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:39 PM
--9957--
Why are condoms like cameras? -they both capture the moment.
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:40 PM
#9958
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:40 PM
A man said to his wife: "Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?"
"OK," she said. "You stand by the ironing board and I'll lie on the sofa and watch TV."
--9959--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:40 PM
When a man and woman are trying to have sex, he will often climax before she is ready. Sometimes he will climax before she is, technically, in the room.
--9960--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:40 PM
#9961
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:41 PM
Why is sex like a game of bridge? -You don't need a partner if you have a good hand.
--9962--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:41 PM
#9963
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:41 PM
I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.
--9964--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:42 PM
#9965
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:42 PM
A man went into a store to buy some condoms. "That's 1 dollar 15 plus tax," said the store assistant. "I don't need tacks," said the man. "It'll stay up all by itself."
--9966--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:43 PM
#9967
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:43 PM
--9968--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:43 PM
#9969
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:43 PM
--9970--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:44 PM
#9971
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:44 PM
--9972--
bad jokes will now follow....
# What happened when the teacher fell in the copier?
# She was beside herself.
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:44 PM
#9973
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:44 PM
Do zombies rule? Of corpse they do!
--9974--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:45 PM
What do you call death by pig stampede?
Sooey-cide.
--9975--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:46 PM
Why did the kid dump a bucket of water off the school roof?
He wanted to make a big splash in front of his class.
--9976--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:46 PM
At school, I saw my principal walking around in a daze. I asked him what happened, and he just looked at me and said, "I've lost my faculties!"
--9977--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:47 PM
Why don't sharks eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
--9978--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:48 PM
Holy Kleenex, Batman! He was right under our nose, and we blew it!
--9979--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:49 PM
What do modern artists eat for breakfast?
Surreal.
--9980--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:49 PM
#9981
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:49 PM
Why couldn't the woman buy a bakery shop?
She couldn't raise enough dough.
--9982--
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:50 PM
A hungry African lion came across two men. One was sitting under a tree and reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.
--9983--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:50 PM
#9984
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:51 PM
In Washington D.C., helicopters are often used to monitor the traffic conditions. Frequently jammed is the Francis Scott Key bridge, named after the man who wrote the national anthem. The bridge's traffic problem is notorious; among some, it's known as the Car Strangled Spanner.
--9985--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:51 PM
#9986
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:51 PM
--9987--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:51 PM
#9988
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:52 PM
--9989--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:52 PM
#9990
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:52 PM
--9991--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:53 PM
#9992
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:53 PM
--9993--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:53 PM
#9994
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:54 PM
#9995
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:54 PM
--9996--
Sharni
07-18-2003, 11:55 PM
#9997
MilkToast
07-18-2003, 11:55 PM
--9998--
MilkToast
07-19-2003, 12:01 AM
--9999-- and.........
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