[QUOTE]Originally posted by dicksbro
[B]Some cute limericks:

Here's another:

There once was a man from Nantucket
whose dick was so long he could suck it
he said with a grin as he wiped off his chin
if my ear was a pussy I'd fuck it

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Joke em if they can't take a fuck.

Another joke, made me laugh.

Three guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a docter, one was a lawyer, the other was a biker. After a sip of his martini, the docter said; " You know tommorow is my anniversary. I got my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure that if she doesn't like the ring at least she'll like the Mercedes, and know that I love her."
After finishing his scotch, the lawyer replied; "Well, on my last anniversary, I got my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, she'd at least like the trip and she'd know that I loved her."
The biker then took a swig from his beer, and said; "Yah, well for my anniversary I bought my old lady a tee-shirt and a vibrator. I figured that if she didn't like the tee-shirt, she could go fuck herself."

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Joke em if they can't take a fuck.

A couple had been married for 20 years. Whenever they made love the husband insisted on turning off all the lights. The wife thought this was a little ridiculous, so she decided to break him of this habit. One night they were in the middle of wild, screaming sex, she turned the lights on. When she looked down she was quite surprised, and not too happy to find that her husband was impotent. He was using a dildo on her. "You impotent bastard", she screamed, "You have some explaining to do". Her husband looks her calmly in the eye, "I'll explain the toy, you explain the kids".

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Joke em if they can't take a fuck.

A man has suffered from migraines for like 20 years.
He finally goes to the Doc and the Doc says... "Well, I know what causing your headaches... it's your testicles... they are pushing against your spine and that causes the headache The only treatment is castration." So the man reluctlantly aggrees and has it done. He is very depressed and finds himself meandering about town and he finds himself outside a Men's clothing store and figures a new suit may help him feel better. The owner, an eldery man, comes to help him and he says he'd like a new suit. The man looks him up and down and says, "44 long." The newly castrated man says, "Incredible! That is right... how'd you know?" The old man says, "60 years in the business is how I know." So he tries the suit on and it fits perfect and he is feeling better, so he decides he needs a new shirt. Again the old man looks at him hard and pegs his shirt size dead on. The man is just amazed. The old man says again, "60 years in the business, you just learn to know these things." The guy decides shoes would be great too. "9 1/2," the old man replies... another perfect match. Finally the guy says he better get some new underwear. The old man looks at him again and says... "size 36." The guy exclaims, "HA! Got you that time old timer, I've worn 34's for some 20 years now." To this the old man says, "You can't wear 34's!"
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They'll push your testicles up into the base of your spine and give you a hell of a headache...

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

A CHris Rock fav...

It's a strange world when....


The best pro golfer is BLACK



The tallest guy in the NBA is CHINESE



The most famous rapper is WHITE



The French accuse the Americans of being ARROGANT



The Germans don't want to go to WAR



...And the three most powerful men in the world are named



Bush



Dick



and Colon

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Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney