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#361~LMAO, Aqua.

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#362~This is terrible:

Sex With Teacher
A boy in the 6th grade comes home after school one day. His mother notices that he has a big smile on his face. She asks, "Did anything special happen at school today?"
"Yes,Mom. I had sex with my English teacher!"

The mother is stunned. "You're going to talk about this with your father when he gets home." Well, when Dad comes home and hears the news he is happy as hell. Beaming with pride, he walks over to his son and says, "Son, I hear you had sex with your English teacher."

"That's right, Dad."

"Well, you became a man today-this is cause for celebration. Let's head out for some ice cream, and then I'll buy you that new bike you've been asking for."

"That sounds great, Dad, but can I have a football instead of the bike? My ass is really killing me."

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#363--Done for now.

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

364 good morning Sharni

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

#365 One normal earth year

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

366 OMG rotflmao IAKGirl

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The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.~ Betty Grable

If I wanted your opinion, I'd remove the duct tape and ask you for it.~ Me
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
One man's dream is another man's nightmare~~~~> §¤ Lilith ¤§
~>My Scribbles<~
==>Gone Shopping<== ~Just a Quickie~ *~A Celebration Vacation~* ~Surprises~ Sleeping With the Window Open
What Did You Do Today? Self Defense Class ~Short Sweet Snippets~ § Summer Spin § Story Challenge Submission Pajamas

#367

~giggling back at Lil~

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#368 ... Hey, everyone.

#369~Even though I'm a blonde, I find the jokes funny, too.

Blonde Cowboy
One day a blonde was horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started going too fast and bouncing out of control. The blonde tried with all her might to hang on, but soon was thrown off. With her foot caught in the stirrup, she fell head first to the ground. Her head continued to bounce on the ground as the horse would not stop or even slow down. Just as the blonde was about to give up hope and was losing consciousness...the K-Mart manager came out and unplugged the horse.

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#370 - oh no you didn't start on jokes ??? You ask for this !!

A blonde woman named Brandi finds herself in dire trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in serious financial straits. She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help.
She begins to pray... "God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it.

Brandi again prays... God, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."
Lotto night comes and Brandi still has no luck.

Once again, she prays... "My God, why have you forsaken me?? I've lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask you for help, and I have always been a good servant to you. PLEASE just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order"
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Brandi is confronted by the voice of God Himself...

"Brandi, work with Me on this. Buy a ticket."

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FussyPucker

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't...

Sarcasm: It's not big and it's not clever...........but it's funny as fuck!

The Special One!

#371~ROTFLMAO, Fussy.

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#372 ~ I have far too many of these you know !

Q: How do blonde brain-cells die ?
A: Alone.
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a shower and shake her upside down.
Q: How do you change a blonde's mind?
A1: Blow in her ear.
A2: Buy her another beer.
Q: How do you measure a blonde's intelligence?
A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!
Q: How do you keep a blonde busy all day?
A: Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?
A: Tell her she's pregnant.
Q: What will she ask you?
A: "Is it mine?"
Q: How does a blond spell farm?
A: E-I-E-I-O


this is a VERY small selection

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FussyPucker

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't...

Sarcasm: It's not big and it's not clever...........but it's funny as fuck!

The Special One!

#373~Cute...very cute.

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

#374 ~ If you want more jokes than that you'll have to visit my website and read all 60 something pages of them

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FussyPucker

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't...

Sarcasm: It's not big and it's not clever...........but it's funny as fuck!

The Special One!