ok why does my pussy steal the condom sometimes? it's really kinda embaressing to move from atop my darling man and hear the quiet pop that tells me that i've once again stolen the condom. It hasn't happened after anal just when I'm on top of him .....

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-Seems we got here just in the nick of time. Whats that make us?
--Big damn heros Sir.
-Ain't we just.

Use some duct tape and tape it on that should help.

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it's only kinky the first time

it's not the orgasm but getting there thats fun

a shot in the bush is worth two in the hand

whip me, beat me, tie me up, break my arm, but please don't break my heart

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid people are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt" -Bertrand Russell

and if that doesn't work, try thumb tacks.

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Have you considered the SOFA(r) Swinger, the new and improved Scotz/OldFart Appliance? This is a pair of suspenders shaped to clip to the condom and hold it on.

While this still has some developmental issues to meet and surpass, it is probably still more comfortable than thumbtacks or velcro.

It has pockets for lube and a cellphone preset for 911 (just in case).

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating

I'll need to conduct an indepth observational study. It's a close, hands on approach to therapy that's quite effectual to furthering my expertise on such matters!

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I like; a) taint brushing: b) a good cigar: c) our juices together; d) champagne: e) protein squirts; f)more of these; g)much more of these; h) Damn, slide that thing into me. Deep!
Adage: 2 things are certain in life; Death & Taxes. Therefore; God & Beelzebub had a meeting to fix the problem. A mighty storm prevailed for ages until finally they ended the storm with the agreement: From now on Anyone whom chooses doesn't have to die. "Everyone wins said Beelzebub. You get an eternally grateful bunch of worshippers praying forever for lower taxes as I goad & prod them forever with higher & higher taxation."

A man went to buy condoms....

The cashier said 'that will be $4.50 with tax.'

The man replied 'oh i want the kind that rolls on'.







(tax - tacks........ bad joke)