06-21-2006, 09:33 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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Nudity...cause and effects
I live in a situation that I'm pretty sure is uncommon to most.
Mrs. WI hates clothing. Once the kids are in bed (around 8), she sheds her clothes. Now that summer is here, and with it the hot weather, she doesn't even need a throw/blanket. Don't get me wrong, for I'm not complaining, but she just doesn't understand what that does to me. I love her, and her body excites me. Her breasts are beautiful and they're just sitting there commanding my look. I can't take it anymore. I get horny and I want to touch them, to nuzzle them, to suck her nipple into my mouth and feel it harden against my tongue. She gets annoyed with me, because apparently...she should be allowed to sit around naked without being subjected to my manly reaction.
I've tried everything from coming right out and telling her "Please cover up, because I can't help but get turned on by your body and it annoys you." to sitting next to her on the couch naked and stroking my cock while watching the tv (pretending she's not even there). Nothing helps.
I don't know if I'm looking for suggestions as much as I'm looking for some kind of insight into her thought process.
Women - Do/would you do this? How do/would you handle his reactions?
Men - How do/would you react?
Please tell me I'm not the only one this happens to...every fucking night.
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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06-21-2006, 09:39 AM
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Loungin' Around
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 30,587
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(((((WI))))))
If I am naked and in between tasks (say...showering and getting dressed) sometimes I do rebuff Mr Osuche. I am so damn Type A that if I am in the middle of something...it's often hard to distract me. However, if I am naked and parading around in front of you, you can be sure that I have sex on my mind.
One thing that *will* get me annoyed, however, on certain occasions....is too much nipple play. My nipples are very sensitive (like every woman's). And depending on the time of the month, over-stimulation can be a very big issue. And too much stimulation *hurts* and gets me out of the mood.
One way to seduce me...always...is to caress my skin, kiss me, nibble my neck. But stay away from my boobies unless I indicate that attention is warranted there!
Perhaps trying a different (non-boobie) approach works? Damn....if you sat next to me and stroked your cock I couldn't think about any TV show!
__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney
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06-21-2006, 10:33 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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The issue is not nipple play...it's attitude. When she gets naked each night she's not looking for sex, she's getting comfortable. I'm supposed to just understand that she's nude as a preference and not seeking sex, and curb my desires. While I do know that her nudity is not meant to entice me...I can't help but get aroused.
What bothers me is that she's allowed to be naked...and I'm not allowed to get excited by that. And the fact that I can't help it is my problem, not hers.
So is this a sane thought process for her to have or is she being extremely selfish?
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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06-21-2006, 10:43 AM
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pixie of the wood
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 10,575
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i think your wife has a point. i realize it's torture for you and of course any involuntary reaction on the part of a certain...erm...prominent protuberance is unhidable. but you’re wife just doesn’t like clothes. and you know she doesn’t feel turned on just because she’s naked. and she doesn’t get naked to turn you on. it's a function of comfort, not foreplay.
at the same time, it isn’t exactly fair to you. and for there to be issues about you getting turned on...may i be frank? that's crap. and you should tell her so. can't help it. get used to it. period. end of conversation.
so compromise, maybe? if your wife could stay clothed and comfortable, she should – at least every once in a while. and when she MUST be nekkid but doesn’t want your advances, then you should keep them to yourself…and that includes diddling yourself next to her on the couch or going on about how sexy she is all nekkid like that and you jus' wanna jump her bones.
for the part about her frustration when you tell her that her body excites you...dude, that's tuff cause you just can’t get her to see that it’s true. i know how much she turns you on, and how much you tell her she turns you on, and how uncomfortable and provoked that makes her feel. perhaps you could tell her in a less overt way. use subtlety and hold back on saying stuff like, “you are the sexiest woman i know” too much. they’re pretty intimidating words, imo.
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06-21-2006, 11:23 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wyndhy
so compromise, maybe? if your wife could stay clothed and comfortable, she should – at least every once in a while
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It's simply not going to happen. She will remain naked and I will be treated like a bad puppy for thinking she is sexy. Compromise only works when it's more than one party participating.
I understand that she's naked because she's more comfortable that way. I understand that just because she's naked doesn't mean she wants sex.
She doesn't understand, and I have to believe she doesn't understand because the alternative is that she doesn't care, that her nudity excites me, and she's unwilling to acknowledge it. She thinks it's unreasonable that I get turned on (at all or ever) by her constant state of undress, and that I really should be more mature than that. I've even gone so far as to tell her I refuse to apologize for finding my own nude wife sexy.
Sorry for what sounds like a rant, but some days it bugs me more than others. My intent for the post was more of a request for a peek into a woman's brain.
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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06-21-2006, 11:29 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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I'm less interested in reserving the right to rub one out than I am in not being thought less of because of my finding her nude body attractive.
Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe I really should be able to see my wife nude and not get excited unless I know she wants sex.
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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06-21-2006, 10:36 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 302
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I'm inclined to take your side of it.
You shouldn't do unneccessary things you know will arouse desire in your partner if you're not prepared to follow through.
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06-21-2006, 10:44 AM
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is not this trim anymore!
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: New England
Posts: 21,709
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I think part of the problem is that she doesn't acknowledge my response as reasonable.
I'm not saying that I paw at her everytime I see flesh, but her nudity does not go unnoticed, and it leads to more of a sexual tone for the evening than there would be if she were dressed.
__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.
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06-21-2006, 10:47 AM
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Loungin' Around
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 30,587
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I'm still stuck on the thought of you stroking your cock while sitting on the couch....
I think she has a right to be comfy in her own home, but I also think that you have a right to be turned on by her body. Plus...if I were her, I'd be flattered that I was so irresistable! I suspect the root of the issue is a mis-matched sex drive....you are ready and she is not.
Perhaps you can work out a compromise with her? On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays she can lounge nude unaccosted. Tuesdays and Thursdays her ass is yours.
Or maybe a series of quickies will do it? I am *always* up for a quickie!
__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney
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06-21-2006, 10:53 AM
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Loungin' Around
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 30,587
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BTW....in this (at least ) your response is very reasonable.....nakedness turns most people on! (((WI)))
__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney
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06-21-2006, 11:15 AM
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gurly gurl
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Reality
Posts: 33,683
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Wow....
I would love to be sitting watching tv naked and knowing my husband couldn't control hisself just by seeing my naked body. I think I will cry right now knowing that that won't happen here. I think it's awesome after so many years of marriage (not sure how long) that just seeing your wife sitting there naked turns you on is awesome!
Sure, I can understand her side to, she's getting comfy, but let me tell you this much. If she was with a man that would say "why are you lying there naked, someone might see you thru the windows".....she'd appreciate your longing for her more!!!!
And like Osuche said, if I saw my man pull it out, hard and stroking, oh man would it be on!!!!
Wish I could help....honestly I wish I could
__________________
~Tainted Love~
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06-22-2006, 09:11 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 302
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Quote:
Originally Posted by osuche
BTW....in this (at least ) your response is very reasonable.....nakedness turns most people on! (((WI)))
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True, although one can grow used to it. I've seen other naked people without being turned on by it but seeing my partner naked is another matter.
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06-22-2006, 05:48 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Home.
Posts: 22,127
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Quote:
Originally Posted by osuche
Or maybe a series of quickies will do it? I am *always* up for a quickie!
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can I volunteer for that job?
__________________
If someone offers a penny for your thoughts and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny??
Don’t let the hardship of the past, take away from the joy of the present
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06-22-2006, 09:42 AM
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Loungin' Around
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 30,587
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Quote:
Originally Posted by musicman
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Anytime
__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney
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06-22-2006, 11:45 AM
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Manwhore
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 15,495
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I would react much the same as you do WI.
Anytime my wife is naked I get turned on... but she doesn't tend to lounge naked. It's either in the shower or getting ready for bed. There is a bit of a difference in that my wife is more understanding of my sexuality, or so it seems. Not that she accepts my advances, (she playfully pushes me away), but she doesn't make a big deal about it.
I wish there was a compromise the two of you could reach.
__________________
Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.
Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien
In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these
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