05-09-2002, 05:40 AM
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Orgasm question
I enjoy sex ... a lot. But I have a problem cumming during sex. I can only seem to cum if I'm masturbating at the same time.
Its not that the sex isn't good ... but I can't seem to cum without my interference. Its not that much of an issue for me but I think its hurting my boyfriend's ego a little. He says its okay but I don't think he really means it.
Any advice?
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05-09-2002, 07:42 AM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,568
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For many women clit stimulaton is the the way they are brought to orgasm. This sounds like it is your case. With exception of a few positions it is not easy for your clitt to be stimulated during intercourse only. I think if he is explained how the anatomy is situated maybe he can see why you need to be touched during penetration in order to have the big O. Keep talking!
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05-09-2002, 02:55 PM
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Member
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: At my apartment!
Posts: 64
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You're not alone...I hear that over 50% of women can't cum from intercourse alone
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05-09-2002, 07:21 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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I only cum during intercourse if I'm on top!
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05-09-2002, 07:31 PM
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words work wonders
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Darwin, Australia
Posts: 1,399
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My experience has shown me, that most women don't cum with penetration. I generally prefer to start with a gentle massage and then follow up with oral. This produces an orgasm and it's not that hard to keep her at boiling point. The clit has been stimulated and already to burst again with orgasms. When I penetrate, the next orgasm is that much closer for my partner. Shaved lips help to keep the whole area sensitive and the juices lubricate to heighten the sensation.
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05-10-2002, 01:56 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,687
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Take joy in the fact you can achieve orgasm during sex.
From what I've read, many women rarely achieve orgasm.
Trying to improve on good sometimes is bad.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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05-10-2002, 02:30 AM
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Member
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: a hole in a tree
Posts: 69
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matbe have him try placing his thumbs on your clit during sex.This way you can get clitoral stimulation but be recieving it from him which will boost his ego.Also lets not forget the toys it can be very fun and exciting making your woman cum over and over again without any penitration at all.though caution should be used with vibrators as I here over stimulation can do the opposite.Also you can try having him tie you to the headboard so you cant touch yourself and let him tease you for a long priod of time bringing you to edge again and again untill your screaming for it and when you finally feel the head brush up against you there should be no need for you to masterbate.Food for thought anyway.
__________________
It was me,I did it.....
I killed you with buttons and bows....
all those clothes......
while you slept.
Rodger Waters
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05-10-2002, 02:59 AM
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Thanks everyone. Both of us know that t probably isn't something that can be fixed but I was hoping that maybe there was someway I could surprise him one day. Never mind.
When he goes down on me it is great and I tend to multiple so I guess that is something. I didn't realise that so many women find it so difficult. Must be why so many fake it.
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05-12-2002, 11:17 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: uk
Posts: 142
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It is difficult and also hard to explain that sex is still great and mind blowing even if there isnt a discernable orgasm. Even when i do have one with out extra stimulation i cant remember what we did different - i suppose the best thing is to try everything and enjoy everything without preconceived expectations and pressures - good luck ict
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adults are just children who owe money
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05-12-2002, 12:07 PM
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yet seldom member
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: below the whitesausage equator
Posts: 1,853
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Talk and relax. Relax and talk. And donīt fake it.
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If every material thing is gone, my smile and my tears stay left.
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05-17-2002, 03:11 PM
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I think therefor I cummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!
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05-18-2002, 07:24 AM
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Gone with the Wind
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: some place new, and interesting
Posts: 862
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"Sex in between your ears, not between your legs"
I don't remember who said that, but I agree with it.
I love sex, and I do orgasm frequently, but I DON'T come every time. Sometimes it is me, sometimes it is him or her, and sometimes, who knows? But I love the feelings, the tastes, the emotions and everything about sex, and wouldn't stop even if my orgasms did, (I think).
You men are funny, in that so many of you think you HAVE to be the one to make your partner cum, and that our using our hand or a toy to orgasm is some how disrespectful or otherwise insulting to you.
I know this is not true of all men especially the dear men I have found in here, in Pixies, but it is true of so many of the men I meet in Real Life.
This is one reason sex with other women is more... thoughtful? I am not sure of the word I want here, mental, or emotional, maybe? Even in a one night/ one time encounter.
I have avoided "faking" it, I hate lying to anyone.
I have learned that if I realize I am NOT going to cum this time, or again, or whatever, to simply announce that I want him to cum in my mouth, or on my boobs or where ever, is a nice, pleasant (for both of us) way to end the encounter. Sometimes this has even made me orgasm unexpectedly.
Men also need to realize that we don't always have a monster orgasm everytime. I treasure the "little ones", the ones that make me feel warm and flushed and released, as much as the extreme, explosive, screamers that leave me limp, dazed, dizzy and nearly unconcious for several minutes afterwards.
I DON'T want every orgasm to be like that.
I WANT variety! It doesn't mean you aren't a good, satisfying lover if I don't scream myself hoarse, and drool out of the corner of my mouth! (that is soo embarassing, too)
OMG! This soap box got really tall really fast.
It frightens me a little to think there are so many women who never orgasm. I wonder why, wonder if they are unhappy, or confused, or sick, or just not wired to really enjoy sex, or what?
Hon, you come with multiple orgasms when he eats you! I think this means that you simply require more clitoral stimulation, as several others already said in this thread...
Now, how to get off this damn soapbox!!???
Someone help! And then make love to me afterwards?
"in vino, veritas"
(yes I am very buzzed right now)
Wanda
__________________
"I wondered, am I a lesbian, am I straight, or bisexual? Then I realized that I am just a slut.
So where's MY parade?"
---Margaret Cho
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05-18-2002, 08:28 AM
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Turn it up!
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: Music City
Posts: 9,293
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It's ok, Wanda, I've got ya... just put your arms round my neck, & I'll pick you up & carry you to my car... I like driving women to Ecstacy
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Plug me into somethin'
If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.
No good deed ever goes unpunished
Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.
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05-18-2002, 10:24 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,687
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And don't forget your seat belt, Scotz.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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05-18-2002, 11:40 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: Rochester N.H.
Posts: 4,134
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I realise that everyone is different.To me;sex;like most things;is
about honesty with each other.For myself;if I learned;that my partner;was faking;and not being honest with me.I would never
want to be with them again.I;personally;do not enjoy myself;
unless;my partner is also.I'm not 15 anymore.Getting off is not my
main priority! Irish
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Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)
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