02-26-2003, 02:29 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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Sexual drought
Well, well, well . . . I'm a frequent poster here but lately, the sex gods have been working against me and my guy. I know a lot of people here are in long-term relationships and must experience times in their lives when sex isn't happening . . . as some of you know, T and I work opposite shifts - I'm still in bed when he leaves for work and when I get home from work he's struggling to stay awake to say hello . . .
Anyway, he spent a week visiting family around Valentine's Day. When he came back, we were facing house problems with no water and no heat . . . the stress was too much for me to think about sex. After Simon and Garfunkel's beautiful opening to the Grammys, I realized it was that time of the month and it was one of those cycles where I don't want any . . .
So . . . . . we're packing for a move AGAIN (granted, it's just a few blocks away but a move's a move!) and it looks like we might be going almost a month without any nookie!
What's the longest time you've been without sex with your s/o? And why? What was it like when you got back together?
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02-26-2003, 03:41 AM
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Wishful Thinker
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Augusta, Georgia
Posts: 3,234
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Dang Hon a month? I've seen 6 months and then got back together and it sucked. Of course this is different.... all I could see when we were together was her and that bastard she was screwing around with. Truthfully within a loving relationship, when threre is a lul for reasons of timing or whatever the loving is only that much better when it resumes, or so I've found. Not everybody has my luck. Just be sure to make the best of the time you have together, let him know you're concerned about it and talk about ways to make time for yourselves. We unsuccessful loves always know what we shoulda done. LOL
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As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates
Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
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02-28-2003, 01:33 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
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LOL Thanks so much, BigBear - you put it in perspective. I'm sorry to hear you were with someone who was screwing around
We're both concerned about it but the timing's been off. I was curious as to how long other couples have gone without sex and why.
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02-28-2003, 04:32 AM
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Wishful Thinker
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Augusta, Georgia
Posts: 3,234
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Thanks Steph, shoulda just deleted that part. Big tiff with my current has had me in a terrible funk of late. We shall overcome, right?
__________________
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will. He will be sure to repent - Socrates
Love is not looking in each other's eyes, but looking together in the same direction - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
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02-28-2003, 06:18 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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We definitely will!
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02-28-2003, 06:42 AM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 25
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hmmm..the longest me and my hubbie have gone without sex was about 3 long agonizing battery draining months.
The reason why was a combination of two things. The first was our work schedule. Like you, he was working nights while I worked during the day and we had opposing days off. I worked mon-fri but since he's a cop, his days off were during the week and he was subject to unexpected call backs even then.
The second reason was our major problem though. He had been assigned as lead investigator to the Sexual Assault Reponse Team and after hearing about rapes and child molestation all day..well...lets just say it took a while before the little trooper felt like reporting to duty again.
However, once we got the train back on track, it was wonderful. The sex was mindblowing and intense for quite some time.
So dont worry too much, once things get back to normally I'm sure you'll be back to your regular scheduled 'programs'...
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02-28-2003, 09:50 AM
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Turn it up!
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: Music City
Posts: 9,293
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jilly Jill
..well...lets just say it took a while before the little trooper felt like reporting to duty again.
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I didn't want it to seem like I find anything funny about someone's personal troubles, but...
that line had me ROFLMAO!!!!
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If the theory does not conform to the facts, then the facts must be discarded.
No good deed ever goes unpunished
Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level, & beat you with experience.
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02-28-2003, 10:38 AM
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Magic Clit
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: scotland...brrrrr!
Posts: 369
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The longest I've had to go without was 9 months, like BigBear, I had to watch my (ex) man screwing around with some STI riddles whore.
it took me 9 months to get over him and move on, did I hell go back to him. He screwed me around, and only spoke to me when his girls wasn't around. The tables turned the other day when I met him in the street, he invited me over for 'coffee and a chat'. The rat answered the door naked. presuming I wanted him.
The look on his face when I said no was priceless, then went home and got some real loving lol!
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I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.
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03-07-2003, 01:21 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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Woohoo!!!!! We finally had sex last night! It was fantastic! It was a long time cumming but it was worth it. I'm not going to retire the Oral B, though
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03-07-2003, 02:04 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Culver City, CA, US
Posts: 226
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I went through a 3 year dry spell!
At the end of an 18 year marriage, we just plain didn't like each other. Add 10 hour a day jobs, two small kids, a mortgage, and two people who didn't know each other, and you get a lack of attraction.
I took care of myself, and I guess she did, too (I heard the Oral B buzzzin. on occasion LOL).
Funny thing is, after the separation (and sewing some wild oats!), I hooked up with a woman who for her own reasons had had a dry spell, too. Together, we were dynamite!
In the future, i will beg, plead, lie, or pay for sex so I don't go through another dry spell! Life's too short!
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seriousfun
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03-07-2003, 05:51 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: USA
Posts: 139
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Hubby and I have gone through lots of dry spells for one reason or another. After our second child was born, we didn't have sex for many months...due to health issues on my part, a move and sick kids. Recently, our oldest child was seriously injured and we went over a month just because of circumstances. Most of the time our dry spells are just due to life...long days at work, tough days with the kids, family issues and everything else life throws at you. We both understand when one of us doesn't want to have sex and we just wait patiently until we are both ready.
I think that if you truly love each other, you both can wait until you are both willing.
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03-08-2003, 02:13 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
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Thanks, guys. Sweet, I know exactly what you mean. We've been patient and understanding but when I read your post it made me think of all the men I know who say they cheat because their wives hate sex.
We all know the stereotype. Men like sex more than women (hey! it seems to me more women are frequent posters to pixies than men - do we have stats on that?).
When do people cheat on their sig. other? When do people know that the 'spark' isn't coming back?
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03-08-2003, 10:21 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 1,449
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I'm going through that now myself. I've been spending a lot of time on pixies, masturbating to the naked pics of all you beautiful people, and showers have taken on a whole new meaning.
Our problem is that I teach in a not-so-great Jr. High School and I'm so exhausted by the time I get home from work that I'm in bed by 9:00 and asleep by the time he comes in a 11:00.
Also, we've just been out of sync. When I try to wait up for him,
I'm so tired I'm not in the mood anymore. And when try to do it earlier we risk the kids hearing us, because they're not asleep yet. I think we need to get away for a week-end by ourselves,
or the next time we tell the kids we're going out, hit a motel that
features short stays............................................. .....
Masturbation is a quick fix, but it's no substitute for the real thing !!!1
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Only with the heart can one see rightly.
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