
10-03-2003, 10:04 AM
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Bastard of Member
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Illinois
Posts: 6,029
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Things you probably won't see on a Hallmark card:
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk
But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.
9. Our love will never become cold and hollow
Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.
8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store
In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.
7. This feels so good, it feels so right
I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.
6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class
Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.
5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished
But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!
4. Through all the things that came to pass
Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.
3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie
I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".
2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny
So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!
1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister,
you should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
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Love...the slowest form of suicide.
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10-03-2003, 10:22 AM
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~*Geeky Girl*~
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On the farm
Posts: 47,960
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OMG ROTFLMAO
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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author
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10-03-2003, 11:19 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: T.O.
Posts: 20,828
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Are these lines from Skip's diary? 
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10-03-2003, 11:54 AM
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♦*♥Moderatrix♥*♦
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: on top of it all
Posts: 50,568
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TY skippy~ I know someone who has a birthday coming up and some of these express my sentiments exactly
5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished
But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMMICH!!! 
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10-03-2003, 04:59 PM
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yada, yada, yada
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Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 2,805
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LMAO!!!
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10-03-2003, 05:19 PM
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<----Snappin' Pussy
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Queensland, Australia
Posts: 106,936
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LOL
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Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.
*~Sharni~*
If you go hunting tigers....be prepared when ya catch one!
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10-03-2003, 06:04 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 547
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Quote:
Originally posted by Steph
Are these lines from Skip's diary?
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Sounds like they're from someone's diary.
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10-03-2003, 07:07 PM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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Those are terrific, STO.
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10-04-2003, 10:51 AM
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Ethical Epicurean
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Santa Monica California
Posts: 1,570
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Idea for a new greeting card business....
__________________
Sex is one of nine reasons for reincarnation.The other eight are unimportant...Henry Miller
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10-05-2003, 12:57 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 12
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hahaha!
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10-06-2003, 11:06 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Souther Cali
Posts: 160
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there needs to be hallmark cards to say those things. if card are supposed to represent the things we want to say...arent we thinking some of those things anyways.
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10-16-2003, 12:10 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,687
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I was sent by a friend last year (on re-cycled computer printout
folded to look like a card)
Times are tough, things are hard,
Here's your fucking Xmas Card.
This year I plan to send him one with a Nativity scene on the front
and the line "Jesus loves you", and inside:-
Everyone else thinks you're an arse-hole.
Just as well I like the bloke lol.
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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10-16-2003, 01:10 PM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Maryland
Posts: 541,353
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skipthisone,
Good lines! Wish I was young enough to use them...
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Eudaimonia
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10-16-2003, 03:15 PM
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Bouncy Bunny
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,252
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10-17-2003, 12:58 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: TX
Posts: 176
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I like these, I might just have to use a few of them.
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