Dear staff,


Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of economy in US since last Christmas, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age on early retirement. This scheme will be known as



RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).



Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW scheme (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.



Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants or Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by management.



Persons staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of SHIT it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring to the attention of your Supervisor. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.



Sincerely,



The Management

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In other countries like Far East Asia women are still held in LOWER esteem BUT in China, it’s a different story. Chinese women are much more aggressive and outspoken and held in Higher esteem.” I love Communist that provides males and females Equality and WOMEN’S Rights in China.

Cute!

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"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, then let it, and if you have to wait for what you really want, take the time because nobody said that life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it." ~ Unknown author

LOL @ CP!! Very funny!!

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Put me on wheels and I'll turn tricks.

Clever? Nah, I ran out of that years ago. But if you find this, let me know, k?
"The road goes ever on..." ~ Tolkien

In memory of my friend skip...
Go then, there are other worlds than these

ChinesePussy,

Yeah, I used to work there.

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Eudaimonia

hehehe

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In other countries like Far East Asia women are still held in LOWER esteem BUT in China, it’s a different story. Chinese women are much more aggressive and outspoken and held in Higher esteem.” I love Communist that provides males and females Equality and WOMEN’S Rights in China.

LOL @ CP!! Very funny!! TOO TRUE!!

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Thank god I'm only 24.

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"...I won't be your winter...and I won't be anyones excuse to cry."

"Even heroes have the right to bleed."

"I'm wakin up at the start of the end of the world

Boy howdy.................good thing I'm only 28. Holy Sheeeeeeeet

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