My hand and I have a romantic little ditty that makes us all warm and fuzzy inside:

GG Allin - I Wanna Fuck Myself

I pull my pud until it bleeds
I masturbate on toilet seats
Girls can't give me the satisfaction
I fuck my fist to the rage of passion

I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
Fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself

I like the way it fits in my hand
Feel the cum through my burning head
I like to fly it on my chest
I fuck myself 'cause I'm the best

I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
Fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
And no one else

I love myself
I wanna fuck myself

I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself

I beat myself until I'm raw
Come and come 'till there's no more
My hand is my favorite whore
Stick my finger up my ass, beat it some more

I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
Fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself
And no one else
And no one else
I wanna fuck myself
I wanna fuck myself

__________________
I want to know everything
I want to be everywhere
I want to fuck everyone in the world
I want to do something that matters