OMG - I can't believe I'm reading this!
I just love the idea that women are only discerning in their choice of sexual partners because they're worried they're going to come to physical harm if they get involved with 'strange men'. I can certainly tell you this is not the case for me, since the man I'm engaged to marry I met on a sex site on the internet (it's called Pixies, btw) and went up to his home town to meet him. On our first day of meeting, he ended up in my hotel room, having ordered breakfast for two, before I'd even made my mind up whether or not to kiss him! It's really not my personal safety that governs my decisions about men. It's whether I find them attractive, as I've already stated.
And as I've also already stated, whether I find a guy physically attractive or not, has nothing to do with what they look like. I can but my hand on my heart and say that, personally, I have never been in a situation where I've seen an 'attractive stranger' in a bar, and even wanted to approach them for a drink. The reason? Someone isn't attractive to me until I know them. I think physically, Johnny Depp is one of the most good looking men on the planet, but if I bumped into him in a night club, I wouldn't want to have sex with him. This is not about stigma, it's about feeling the need for such physical intimacy with a person. There are some things that you just wouldn't want to do with another person, unless you felt something for them (whether that something is love/ attraction/ whatever). If physical interaction is so casual a thing, would you be willing to stick your finger inside a man's anus? No? Why not? Oh, because you don't fancy men......well, guess what I don't fancy strangers. It's the same thing. It's not about being uptight or 'Victorian' it's about not being wet!!!!
I'm curious to know whether you've ever been in love, or even cared deeply for a woman you've had sex with, because I'm pretty sure your views on this would be different if you had been. Once you've experienced how much better sex is when you have an emotional connection with your partner, the idea that sex is just a biological function is really presposterous.
As for sex in public, as long as children are allowed out of the house, sex in publc is NOT something that's going to become the norm. Or do you think it's healthy for young children to be exposed to sex in this manner (bearing in mind that showing children pornography is considered child abuse in this country because of it's psychologically damaging effect)?
Also, with this 'Brave New World' in which we are promiscuous and children are either kept away from public or else encouraged to be involved in 'sexual play' (OMG, is this sounding like an Aldous Huxley book to anyone else?) what of HIV and AIDS? Are you seriously telling me that people will be happy to have sex indiscriminately, regardless of whether their partners may be infectious? Even WITH condoms? Because I sure as fuck wouldn't take the risk of sleeping with someone if I knew they had HIV - condoms aren't infallible.
To return to the original point, there are women out there who you can just approach for sex, and they'll go fuck you, no questions asked. They completely understand how men 'NEED' sex. That's why they charge men for it.
On a final note, Victorian attitudes. I genuinely feel that no-one on this thread has expressed any Victorian attitudes - except one. And that one, is you. Your attitude towards women is the most Victorian thing I've encountered in a long time. If you honestly think that women 'want something from a guy before sleeping with him' and that it's a case of us wanting to have sex but cowering in fear of you big strong men then you really do need to think carefully about why it is that women are not 'giving it up' enough in your opinion. Could it be that this thread is about why women are not 'giving it up for you'? In which case I could hazard a guess that it's not about fear, or prudishness or societal pressures, it's that women like to have sex with men who are respectful of our gender. Who appreciate the differences between men and women, and who realise that we're wonderful just as we are. You can make all the excuses you like about why you aren't getting enough sex from enough women, but perhaps, just perhaps you shouldn't be looking at what's wrong with us women but what's wrong with you.
Lou
x
P.S. Interestingly, I had a conversation with a group of friends last night (both male and female) and I was the only person there who thought that 'cunt' was a word you could use to describe the female gentials during sex. I only mention it so that you realise that when extolling the virtues of sex as an expression of love/ attraction, I'm not referring to 'love making' in the traditional, roses, candles and moonlight kind of way.
Finally, I've just seen your reply to WildIrish. It's good to see you have strong feelings for your mother....I wonder how you'd feel if you found out she was well known in her neighbourhood as being a really great fuck. Maybe your friends have all had a go and found she gives the best head around and doesn't mind the odd spot of anal either! If we're going to liberate women sexually, we going to be liberating ALL women, including your mother, grandmother, aunts wife, daughters etc......and it'll be them you're watching in the street when sex in public is de rigeur - won't that be fun?!