What I've learned from watching porn...

It's a great way to get your mother-in-law to call on you.

It's a great way to encourage your grand daughter to pop up out of her cozy bed and come downstairs to say "HI GRAMMA! What're you and grampa watching?? It sounds like a FUN movie and can I watch it with you guys?"

Never watch porn if you MUST get the picture OFF the screen real fast...

Never watch porn in a VCR that's been giving you troubles lately.
NOW will be the time you'll get the *movie* stuck in the machine and you'll be forced to take it to a repair shop to have the special little *movie* extracted.....screw the VCR just GET YOUR MOVIE back!