>> >> > > > How to Shower Like a Woman
> >> >
> >> > > > 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned
> >> >
> >> > > > laundry hamper
> >> >
> >> > > > according to lights and darks.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If
> >> >
> >> > > > you see husband
> >> >
> >> > > > along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
> >> >
> >> > > > make mental note
> >> >
> >> > > > to do more sit-ups
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
> >> >
> >> > > > cloth, long
> >> >
> >> > > > loofah,wide loofah, and pumice stone.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage
> >> >
> >> > > > shampoo with 43 added
> >> >
> >> > > > vitamins.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint
> >> >
> >> > > > conditioner enhanced
> >> >
> >> > > > with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15
> >> >
> >> > > > minutes.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub
> >> >
> >> > > > for 10 minutes
> >> >
> >> > > > until red.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and
> >> >
> >> > > > jaffa cake body
> >> >
> >> > > > wash.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 11. Shave armpits and legs.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 12. Turn off shower.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray
> >> >
> >> > > > mold spots with
> >> >
> >> > > > Tilex.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a
> >> >
> >> > > > small country.
> >> >
> >> > > > Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and
> >> >
> >> > > > towel on head.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any
> >> >
> >> > > > exposed areas.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > How To Shower Like a Man
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the
> >> >
> >> > > > bed and leave
> >> >
> >> > > > them in a pile.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along
> >> >
> >> > > > the way, shake
> >> >
> >> > > > wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire
> >> >
> >> > > > the size of
> >> >
> >> > > > your wiener and scratch your ass.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 4. Get in the shower.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 5. Wash your face
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 6. Wash your armpits.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water
> >> >
> >> > > > rinse them off.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh
> >> >
> >> > > > at how loud they
> >> >
> >> > > > sound in the shower.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and
> >> >
> >> > > > surrounding area.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
> >> >
> >> > > > stuck on the
> >> >
> >> > > > soap.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 11. Shampoo your hair.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 13. Pee.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor
> >> >
> >> > > > because
> >> >
> >> > > > curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
> >> >
> >> > > > light and fan on.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist.
> >> >
> >> > > > If you pass
> >> >
> >> > > > wife,pull off towel, shake wiener at her and
> >> >
> >> > > > make the woo-woo
> >> >
> >> > > > sound again.
> >> >
> >> > > >
> >> >
> >> > > > 19. Throw wet towel on bed.

__________________
Irish---Better to be dead & cool,then alive & uncool!
(Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man)