silentsoul...

First.. your name suits you well I think...

Secondly... could it be that since your wife is aware of your bi-ness... that maybe her hesitation is caused more by a fear that once you experience that portion of your sexuality that you may loss interest in the part of your sexuality that she participates in? Just a thought.. IF that is what her fear is... I don't see how you are going to be able to convince her otherwise...

I don't envy your situation at all... denying yourself a deep desire out of loyalty and love for your wife. I do hope that you are able to continue to do so, for the sake of your marriage.... but I can't help but think that denying part of your sexuality must be exhausting emotionally thus that can't be good for odds of a long term marriage.

Can I ask... IF you were certain you were bi-sexual before you got married, why did you not choose to experiement with that PRIOR to making a long term commitment?

Good luck... and I am sorry for your struggle.