OK, true story. Yes, I know these types of thing are all true stories, but this one is:

A friend of mine was zipping through Georgia at about 70 mph (this was back when the speed limit was 55 mph). cop catches him on radar, pulls him over. Cop gets out of his cruiser, saunters up tot he car.

Cop: "What makes you think you can go through Georgia like that, boy?"

My friend: "Well, SHERMAN did it."

The cop bumped up the speed my friend was travelling at to 1 mph below the limit for immediately hauling his ass in.

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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.