A little boy went over to his grandparents' house and his grandfather was smoking a cigar. "May I have a puff of your cigar?" asked the boy. "Does your dick touch your asshole?" asked the grandfather. "No." "Then you can't have a puff of my cigar."

A few hours later the grandfather was drinking a beer. The little boy asked, "May I have a sip of beer?" "Does your dick touch your asshole?" "No." "Then you can't have a sip of beer."

After dinner the little boy was eating cookies and milk and the grandfather asked, "May I have a cookie?" The little boy responded, "Does your dick touch your asshole?" "Yes" replied the grandfather. The little spoke up and said, "Then you can go fuck yourself Grandma made these cookies for me."

__________________
"BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Will he offer me his mouth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his teeth? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his jaws? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes. GIRL: Again, will he offer me his hunger? BOY: Yes! GIRL: Yes. BOY: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses? GIRL: Yes. BOY: I bet you say that to all the boys!" -Meatloaf