Shorts

Shortest English sentence “I am” longest “I do.”

Difference between bonds and men – Bonds mature!

What do you call a man who looses 75% of his intelligence? - Divorced.

Two old ladies are in a restaurant. One complains, "You know, the food here is just terrible." The other shakes her head and adds, "And such small portions."

I was on the subway, sitting on a newspaper, and a guy comes over and asks ‘Are you reading that?" I didn’t know what to say. So I said yes. I stood up, turned the page, and sat down again.