USA RECESSION

The
recession has hit everybody really hard... .....................

My
neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

Wives are
having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.

CEO's are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off
25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered her
with rolls
of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon with only
one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient
Funds," you
call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted
a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies
and learned their
childrens' names.

My cousin had an exorcism
but couldn't afford to pay for it, and
they re-possessed her!

A
truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.

A picture is
now only worth 200 words.

The Treasure Island Casino in Las Vegas is
now managed by Somali pirates.

__________________
Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating