i know from experience that i need to be ok by myself before i can be ok with anyone else. i had found someone i thought was my "soul-mate". as far as the lifestyle i had back then maybe i did. when we started talking about marriage i tried to stabilize and she didn't seem to. anyway it blew up in my face. i moved back to mass. i felt like a shell. i started dating just to feel better. well, i wound up married with my child. the marriage was a total disaster and the divorce even worse. what strikes me as really funny is i doubt she's still my "soul-mate" given my life and the changes it's made in me. my daughter is the only worthwhile part of 6 years of my life when i tried to avoid pain and wound up with more. right now i'm lucky to know my limits (yeah i got some baggage) and to have a woman who accepts where i'm coming from. funny cause when i met her it started light with expectations of not lasting (at least on my side) and while it's still light harted and fun it's been a year and 1/2

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