My wife and I are in a polyamourous relationship and she was actually the first one to bring this to our relationship. She had a friend online that wanted to take their relationship further and we talked about it (she could have hidden it and I wouldn't have known for Goddess-knows how long) and we decided to open our relationship that way and have had fights due to it (the guy said he loved me more once we started to edge along the poly lines and eventually said he wanted me to leave her for him, not happening).

We've also had a lot of breakthroughs in our relationship because we are willing to talk things out and take care of each other as best we can.

I think the things to ask about would include why she wants to experience another man, is there something you're lacking in (not trying to start trouble but there are things I want my wife to do that are great if she likes it and torture if she doesn't), is it just the 'trying something new' angle? As with any changes to a relationship, communication is the key to this.

I truly believe in my heart that a relationship doesn't only mean two people together forever, but everyone has to define what they feel and what they want in their life. If you need it, be willing to brave all of hell and half of heaven to get it. If you don't want it, be willing to talk to your partner about it and learn more about it. Often there are ways of doing things you don't like yourself so that your partner can still have fun. Understand that there are exceptions; if you want to tie someone up and do some pain-play, your partner not liking it makes it little better than torture. If you want torture, then remember I was here to help you and use the cane like I like it!

One rule for some of the scenes I like is simple and applies to just about everything in life, Safe, Sane, Consensual. If you can use communication to enforce that rule in your life, then you're doing something right.

Best of luck and I hope you find what makes you both happy and makes your life work in the real world, just remember that if anyone ever tells you how you should live, that you can always tell them they should go pound sand.

(Btw, hate to add to the wall of text but if you ever want to talk more about anything, PM me. I'll get back within a day or so. )

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