01-16-2008, 10:06 AM
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pixie of the wood
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 10,575
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all good advice above.
i have to say here i hope you don't talk to her the same way you talk about her - as if she were a trial to you. talking about her this way ... well, i must admit it pissed me off a bit. it isn't exactly understanding or loving. she needs help (if she wants it), not pressure and degradation.
it's kind of an old joke that turning on a man is easier than flicking on a light and more obvious to boot but it turns out that compared to a woman's libido, it's really true. with a man, it's usually a mechanical problem (ED) but for women it's way more complicated than that. even a low level of testosterone (once thought to be the source of low libidos in women) doesn't seem to be the only culprit. women's libidos are proving to be way more complicated than just hormones and attraction. psychological factors - like her desire to be and feel sexual and her beliefs about sex - also play a large role in shaping her libido. they call it hsdd (hypoactive sexual desire disorder) and there is not normally one cure or quick fix because sexuality is a different experience for everyone. if she's never experienced sexual passion, she may not even know what she's missing.
i hope she decides she wants to find ways to increase her libido because aside from the health benefits, sex - and i mean just the journey itself - can be such a happy, joyful, wondrous and wonderful experience that it's heartbreaking to think of life without it. plus, an orgasm (or five) feels mighty fine.
let her know i wish her luck, understanding, patient exploration and thoughtful support.
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