1. Your houseplants are alive and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the refrigerator.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up ... not when you go to bed.
5 You hear your favorite song on the elevator.
6 You watch the Weather Channel.
7 Your friends "Marry" and "Divorce" ... not "Hook Up" and "Break Up."
8 You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9 Jeans and a sweater are no longer considered being dressed up.
10 ou're the one calling the police because those %#@$ kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11 Older relatives now feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance payments go down while your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet rather than McDonald's scraps.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie are the whole date, and not just the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3:00 AM would upset your stomach, not settle it.
19. You go the the drug store for IBUPROFEN and Antacid and not for condoms and pregancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before you go to a bar.
25. When you find your friend is pregnant you congratulate then instead of asking, "Oh, shit, what the hell happened?"