
01-09-2008, 08:37 AM
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Registered User
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: North Australia
Posts: 17,687
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From the master himself.
BILLY CONNOLLY'S CHAIN LETTER
Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50
billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe if you send them on, a poor six
year old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it
removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak show.
And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000?
How stupid are we?
Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into
the next day! What a bunch of bullshit.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep
for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrim
stowaways on the Endeavour. Fuck 'em!! If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing.
I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow
receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.
I don't fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards.
Chances are, it's our own unpopularity. The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or
luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it's funny, send it on.
Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied
to the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive
if you forward this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous
and will consume your genitals.
Have a nice day.
Billy Connolly
P.S: Send me 15 bucks and then fuck off
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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating
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