Tovarisch, Comrades, friends

It is all a Capitalist misunderstanding.

Alexei Mihailovich merely attempted to light his good communist Cuban cigar, but got a little confused in the heat of the moment. He naturally screamed and dropped his wodka.

Had the woman caught the falling wodka, saving a valuable resource in the process, Alexei Mihailovich may have been saved from this added indignity.

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating