TEN THINGS TO PONDER FOR 2007

# 10. Life is sexually transmitted.

# 9. Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die

# 8. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection,
make him a sandwich.

# 7. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the internet
and they won't bother you for weeks.

# 6. Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help
but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

# 5. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing

# 4. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

# 3. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax
cut saves you thirty cents???

# 2. In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and
people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

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DAMN, YOU ARE A SEXY ONE-skipthisone

I beleive in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and I beleive in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. Kevin Costner/Bull Duram

"Your body as well as mine has needs. This is juat a little foreplay to highten our desire for each other. If we play out the game of love to it's natural conclusion, you'll experience fulfillment. Give yourself up to me and I'll guide you along the path to pareadise. Together we will be like fire and ice, love and hate, life and death." Virginia Henley

WANTED: a moment when you kiss someone and eveything around you becomes hazy. And the only thing in focus is you and this person and you relize that he is the only person your suppose to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment you get this amazing gift. You want to laugh and you want to cry. Cause you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared it will all go away at the same time.