I think this was a Steph one, but in case it's new, here goes.

Fifteen days ago, I read that smoking can kill you;

The next day I stopped smoking.
Twelve days ago, I read that too much red meat can kill you;

The next day I stopped eating red meat.

Eight days ago, I read that drinking can kill you;

The next day I stopped drinking.



Yesterday, I read that having sex can kill you;

This morning I stopped reading....

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Calm, quiet, smooth, devastating