WE NEED MORE GRANDMOTHERS IN COURT!!!
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>Why Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't
>prepared for the answer:
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>In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his
first
>witness to the stand . . . a grand motherly, elderly woman. He
>approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know
>me?"
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>She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
>since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big
>disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate
>people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big
>shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to
>anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
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>The Lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
>the room and asked, "Mrs Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
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>She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was
>a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.
He
>can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is
>one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife
>with three different women, one of them was your wife Yes, I know
him."
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>The defense attorney almost died.
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>The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in very
>quiet voice, said:
>"If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your
>sorry asses in jail for contempt."
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