The Letter: Dear Soandso,
 

You are to write a line or two of a letter. What you post must flow on from the last post and make sense. Write as if doing a letter to someone. We shall call this person Soandso. You may talk about things, places, events and people.

I start:


Sorry to tell you this, but your dog ate some bad meat and died.

At least I think that's what it died of. Can't be sure since the water had a funny smell, too.

We were wondering if you'd like a puppy to replace it.

Perhaps a Shitzu, or a Poodle? Both are aptly named.

We must warn you about the possibility of rabies, however.

As the Shitzu puppy named Fung got lose in your yard and ate all your chickens.

Please do not misunderstand. We are not implying that the chickens may have transmitted rabies to the shitzu. It is not possible for birds to have or to transmit rabies. Tests for avian flu are still being performed on the chicken carcasses, and the results are not back from the lab yet.

But don't worry the tests will only cost $500.

We accept MasterCard, Visa and American Express. Sorry absolutely no personal checks will be accepted.

We will also accept cash and money orders, if you would like.

So, what's new with you?

Oh that reminds me. Beki Sue ran off with the Postmen.

Her husband was just devastated until that lovely widow Mrs. Doyle came by from next door with a home cooked meal.

Not only is Mrs. Doyle a superb cook (and quite a looker), but she also has a very unique and erotic way to serve the meal...

Of roasted chicken. She was in her French Maid outfit. You know the one she wore at the New Years Eve party. When she fell in the pool.

The ladies are still gossiping about that over at the LaDiva Beauty Parlor. The way Mrs. Doyle's maid outfit clung to her body when she came out of that water had every man's mouth hitting the floor.

The dentist was very happy that their mouths hit the floor, though, since the chipped teeth resulted in a windfall for him that he spent at Madaam Nina's Attitude Adjustment House.

OH! Before I forget did you know that they opening up one of them new adult book stores right on the corner next to the Starbucks and Daisy Flowers Emporium

Maybe if you don't spend all of your extra cash in testing the puppies for rabies, you might pick up a few dirty movies for us to watch together.

Mrs. Doyle says that Paris Hilton does Dallas is a good one to get. There are so many new stores in town, they have had to put in new street lights! By the way to fix the water from smelling will need new pipes. The hole in the roof has also been fixed.

So, I do want to hear all about what is going on with you. Did you get that little problem of yours fixed? I know you said it was just a little rash but you should still have it checked out.

The men were a little disappointed to see she was wearing panties under the French maid's outfit, but we all cheered up when we saw how they turned transparent when they were wet.

Perhaps you could have the rash taken care of by the people testing the dead chickens. They may give you a cut rate on it. Mrs. Doyle is not the only thing that has been wet here.

Another possibility is that you might have the rash looked at by the correctional department physician. Assuming of course, that the appeal of your sex abuse case falls through. It is still not clear to me whether or not she really was 18; I mean, was that just before , or just after midnight? It really does make all the difference.

I just don't see how anyone can blame you for making an honest mistake. Everyone in town new that girl was no good. Why those short skirts she would flaunt around in and those tight shirts. Why I heard she almost caused an accident at the corner of First and Colonial Rd.

And that was another reason why they put in new street lights.

Later I must go to the garden center today for some new rose bushes. That Mr. Brown got drunk again and drove right through my prize beauties. I don't care that his brother is the judge the man is a menace and should not be allowed to drive!

I just hope that doesn't lead to them putting traffic lights in my front yard.

Hyram, your youngest (you do remember him don't you?), is really becoming quite a pain in the butt. It always amazes me how much he reminds me of you.

He came back into town and started dating Marcy Dawson from the diner. You know how she will spread her legs for any man in town.

I was so absorbed, admiring her smoothly shaved pussy when she bent over to get something from the bottom shelf, that I didn't realise her sister was watching me stroke my cock through my trousers.

You remember her sister, don't you? The one that stripped completely and ran through the greased pig wrestling contest at the county fair last year?

She was fast, but those 3 brothers who immediately decided to enter the contest created quite a spectacle, the likes of which haven't been seen in this county ever before.

That must be why they all joined the army not long after. The brothers I mean, not the pig.

Marcy served up the pig as the special dish of the day at the diner the next day. I watched when she had a portion of it herself, and the way the juices dribbled down her chin made me wonder just how wet she was.

It took a lot of cleaning to get the stains off the floor.

Especially after the tapioca-wrestling orgy.

And speaking of which, we're all so proud. This year they used Grandma's secret tapioca and custard recipe for the orgy. All the participants said it was the creamist and smoothest tapioca they'd ever felt.

And I understand you are preparing for next year's orgy and are now using TWO hands!

You will need them has they have booked the scout hall to hold the orgy in next year.