Been there, done that....
 

All great thoughts shared here but just one more to add...

time.

I think TIME often is the only solution..just being patient and waiting for your fears to lessen.

When you get low come back and re-read people's replies to you. When I've hit some low points, I let people know and their kind and personal words to me helped a great deal.

*hugs*

Steve,

All of the above.

Just adding that there is shit that must be shovelled before you can settle

back and relax. Don't let it scare you. It's just another of life's little

fun things like dentists and exams. Seem huge at the time, but time puts

them in their place.

Most of all, don't take it personally. Smile sweetly and forget it.

Silky: LOL

RG: I have a time plan, I cannot wait. But after the case I will calm down.

OF: I strongly hope it is less than it seems


Stefan

Steve, just wanted to say "hang in there". I've been through the divorce thing and I can honestly say it gets better as time goes on. So again "hang in there", my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Today I woke up with new fears. This is the worst. Not even start the day relaxed...
As I read the news from my lawyer I can say now the conditions of the divorce are becoming worse for me.

Can you tell me how a person can want to DESTROY another one that has not done more than defending himself against attacks of the other?
I´m completely fucked :(:(:(:mad: :confused: :whiteghos :eek:

GS---I can tell you from the experiences of my daughters divorce
that lawyers sometimes cause more problems then there are!
My youngest daughter& her ex-husband,figured that they would
get a moderator instead of a lawyer because they agreed on the
same things.WRONG!They say that the closest thing to love is hate!They proved it!Maybe this will help:
Q:A skunk&a lawyer were both run over at different spots.
How can you tell which was which?
A:The skunk has skid(brake)marks,in front of it! Irish
P.S.I had an older riding buddy,who was a lawyer by profession.
He told me that lawyers tell opponents anything.
9times out of 10,the people believe them because they're a lawyer and lawyers always tell the truth.(Bullshit)

Dear Steve,

I don't know exactly to which you speak when you say you are "completely fucked"......but try and remember that "IT IS ALWAYS DARKEST BEFORE THE LIGHT". This means that when it seems it is at the lowest, worst part of any particular time.......better times are coming and really soon because it couldn't possibly get any worse than it is. Makes sense too because if there is up, then there must be down and vice versa! "TO EVERY ACTION, THERE IS AN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION". It may not seem like it today.........but better times are coming Steve. It's a scientific fact!

*hugs* Hang in there sweetie......I know it's tough, but please hang in there. No one can destroy you completely if you don't let them!

Yes, it will go up again. Oh how much I wished it would be off already...
Perhaps the cause of the fears is the fantasy about the future. Because I do not know the future, the brain starts telling me stories.

She can take everything... but I won´t give her the victory over me. Already this is worth survive it.

Steve I know your a Good individual and have always been very Sincere. I hope that you can see through this and FACE YOUR FEARS HEAD ON. Lifes experiences are cruel and no one said it would be easy. As good a person as YOU are facing it up front is my hope for you. If you continue to torture yourself all that can come of it is HURTING the Ones that truly Love You and I really hope you'll not do that. I'm here for you if you need to talk.....................my one and only divorce almost devastated my health and Life.......................but through it all I maintained and was able to bring myself back from the Depths that are so easily grasped. Chin up my friend................You have friends here. ;)

You've got IT! That's exactly right Stefan! "Everything" she takes.......can be replaced.....eventually! But she can't take you! Or your spirit! Don't let her see you sweat! Be as strong as you can now...........it's almost over!

The fantasy you see.......the stories your brain is telling you.......that is your future! Let it flow! Ride this wave......and all the waves she sends you. When you finally come down from that wave.......and land on the beach............then you can relax and look back and say, "I made it! She couldn't take me down. I am still here......breathing and smiling. Today is the first day of the rest of my life!"

Hang on Steve!.............NO ONE knows the future..........we just know that the future is there for us to get to!

*hugs*

*more hugs*

*and more hugs*

TYVM Qisath and Lixy :):):)

HUGZZZZ! Stefan

P.S.....Steve?

Your sig. ?

Bob Marley?

Great tunage hun!

Lixy: :)
-------------------
Today I have made an experience about suicide. It gives me a new point of view.
I heard about the granddaughter of some neighbours of my parents that she committed suicide some years ago. I didn´t tell it to my parents, but... she was my first secret love at secondary school :(:(:(
My feelings are a BIG sadness about it. From time to time I thought, how she might be, and I had the wish to see her again. And now that.
When I imagine now being in her place... people thinking about me in this way... oh no, I do not want that.
Thinking now about it: How much would I like to help her, how much would I have tried to give her support, how much I would like to take her into my arms. But it is too late. Nothing I can do. Nothing.
I do not want that. No.

Stefan

Oh Stefan,

Such sad news hun! I am so sorry you have to experience this on top of everything.

It is said there is a reason for everthing and to everything a season and a time. I can only assume that the revelation of suddenly finding out that your first love had comitted suicide is a clear message directed to you. It's not a coincidence that you stumbled upon this knowledge at this particular point in you life.

You could have found this out long ago , when your feelings of wanting to see her were beckoning you to her. But you didn't then. And just when you needed a sign.......a realization that life IS worth living and that the pain would be gone for you but those you left behind would suffer, you discover that exact emotion in the loss of your first love. Coincidence? I think not Stefan!

I am so sorry for your loss hun! I wish I could help you through the pain in some way. I think the best I can do is say that she must have known your feelings on some level to have this knowledge fall to you in your time of need of inspiration. Take this as a true sign that you are meant to go on and that there is light at the end of the tunnel for you!

*hugs n hugs again*

Perhaps her death was good for something then :rolleyes: :( :o

TY Lixy :)

Hugs, Stefan