Possession Being 9/10ths And All That Horse Shit.
 

Are you a possessive person? How do you feel about sharing someone's affection? I am not so much speaking of jealousy as I am of personal preference. Curious as always about your views...

Depends on how you define "sharing affection". If he's sharing with his children or his family, I expect it and am very proud of this sharing and of him for being that close with them.

As for other women.... he can have fun with, flirt with, and be friends with... but genuine affection should be saved for me.

Re: Possession Being 9/10ths And All That Horse Shit.
 

Please clairify.:confused:

Re: Re: Possession Being 9/10ths And All That Horse Shit.
 

Do you mind sharing your lover's affections with another?

I don't see it as posession really. It's more a case of devotion. As Sharni said when I'm involved with someone I give my all and expect the same. So far I haven't seen the same returned. Some days I wonder why I have faith I ever will.

Possession implies that you have a right to exclusivity.

It's not a right, but a shared gift.

Like most gifts, if it's shared too widely, it loses it's impact.

My SO and I have friends of various affection, but so long as we

are at the centre, it's OK.

That isn't approval to go out and run riot, just an acceptance that

there are other people on the planet.

Very inciteful comments. I find it interesting how I can understand a feel similar to almost all the posts at the same time. Exclusivity, and shared genuine affection have been on my mind a lot lately, and I am not sure that they have to be opposing views for me. Although I completely understand why they are for many people.

Some people are comforted by absolutes and simplicity.

When things are black and white, judgement and moral

strength are not challenged.

i cud share ....... not love of course, but otherwise, and not on a regular basis but evey now n then ......

~nikki~

I love my wife dearly. Is there someone else out there that I am capable of loving as well. Yes. Absolutely. But that's not what you're asking.

Can I love them at the same time, in the same way? I honestly don't know. I think I could share my wife's affection if the other person was the kind of person I could never be for her. That wasn't easy for me to say, by the way.

The question is a mystery to me....when talking about having your mate sharing their affections for another are we to mean love/sex or a special friendship kind of affection?

If it is of friendship, then I can whole support that. Compassion for another is a special thing that too few of us express to others, and I am just as guilty as the next person.

As to love/sex well that is a difficult matter to think upon. I like to humor myself that I am an open minded person believing anything is possible. Though I suspect, it would matter about the circumstances and understandings of the relationship.

All I know is that for myself, I could not accept either a friendship love or a romantic love for another without my mate's approval. But then I would not likely seek out another person to have feelings for.

No,Not at all,Jealousy is a disease and besides it has the word lousy in it.heh heh

Ok, your last statement has certainly struck a chord. I don't think I could love 2 people in the same way but I can love them in different ways, appreciating the differences that exist. I completely understand how hard it is to say you could share if she needed something that you were not. I don't believe in changing people and so it is certainly quite posible I may need/ want something that he is not. Do I want him to change? Never. So it seems plausible that a person like me to be drawn to and share affection with someone who may have those qualities he does not. Hmmm.... damn now you got me thinking too hard:p

Good...after all the times you made me think? We're still nowhere near even!