I need HELP!!! too

[jennaflower]

hmmmm...

I thought that maybe if I posted a HELP!!!!! thread, Aqua would be so kind as to post more of his delicious pics for me too.. LOL


please... post away... I am in desperate need of your help. LOL

[LixyChick]

LMAO Jenna! I think Aqua has kindness for all of us "Damsels in Distress"

You are too funny G/F!

Now quick.......lay across the railroad tracks with, what appear to be, ropes binding you!

[jennaflower]

LOL... believe me.. if I thought it would help.. I would locate the nearest railroad tracks so that Aqua wouldn't have to look far!!!

Okay... since I have no clue where those specific railroad tracks would be located... how about.. I just sit here.. hold my breath.. until I am in desperate need of CPR.. in which case.. maybe one of the wonderful Pixie Boys will help me out... hmmm... Aqua?? Skipthisone?? Clint?? Come on boys.... I am waiting... LOL... the blue is setting in (I didn't realize us females had a blue problem, but believe me.. we do.. or atleast I do). LOL

[Lilith]

OMG!!!!!!! What a coincidence!!!!!! I need help too........ he is a Superfriend and always knows when we are in need of a hero......

Oh where oh where has my Aquaman gone???
Oh where oh where can he be??????
(I think that was UNDERDOG but hell it might work *shrugs*)

[LixyChick]

Oh woe is me..........I am stuck in this tower and I can't get out! I will extend these long locks and hope with all hope that a sweet prince will use them to climb to my rescue........(knowing all the while.....once he get's his sweet ass up here.....I am gonna cut all my hair off!)

[jennaflower]

notice... no one has offered to help me :( waaaaaaa.... I guess blue is gonna be my typical hue forever :( I thought for sure one of the kind gents would come to my rescue.................

[Lilith]

Sorry I heard Lixy has them all trapped in her turret...:D:D:p

[jennaflower]

LOL... maybe I can smoke em out... LOL.. anyone got a match?? :))

[LixyChick]

Oh woe is me.......I am about to be shoved in this oven by this old knarled witch! I do so hate the heat........but I have left some bread crumbs as a reminder of my path! Maybe a strong, handsome (Pixie God) will follow them and come to my rescue soon!

Hurry....it's getting hot in here! And I am running out of stories!

*Authors note: I don't think Aqua posts on the weekends...things that make ya go hmmmmm!*

[LixyChick]

*Hands jenna the whole box!*

[jennaflower]

LOL... what a horrible thing for Aqua to discover on his return Monday morning.. .the whole darn place in ashes.. .LOL We gotta get the guy some sort of connection of the weekend.. a whole 46 hour absence is enough to turn us horny Pixie women into raving lunitics... well.. I can only speak for my self.. but for me it is an accurate discription. LOL

[Lilith]

I have bad news......... Please try to restrain yourselves....the wailing wall is over there-------------------------->

I have it on good authority that Aqua has Monday off :( sooooooooooooyou know what they say.....

while that cat's away... all the mice get alllllll the pussy:p

[jennaflower]

well ya know... maybe you need to publicize that information... I think maybe that all the male pixies believe that they are forming a line behind Aqua.. and thus since Aqua isn't around :( they are all standing still waiting for their turn...

Okay Guys.. Move ahead.. keep the line moving in an orderly fashion.. no pushing.... no line cutting... there is enough action to go around :) But for heavens sake... get MOVING already.. this pixie is losing patience. LOL

[LixyChick]

Oh woe is me..........I am on this bridge and it seems as if it is about to crumble..........

*I "bloody" well hope not....lmao! This is really a stretch...I know! But as I said...I am running outta stories! OK...back in character...........*

Oh, whatever will I do if this bridge falls down while I am crossing? I am but a "fair lady" and I just know it will be my demise. I sure hope some Pixie man/men come/s to my rescue! I would be ever so grateful!

[LixyChick]

*checking to see if there even is a line??????*

[jennaflower]

I dunno Lixy.. I am beginning to think that the topic I chose what not obvious enough for these men here at Pixies.. Typically I think that these men are very good at picking up hints... like "Help" for instance.. but I am beginning to think that the recent full moon has resulted in the need of using a club over their heads.. LOL.

I have already posted an easily understandable sign for them to read before they proceed.. you know.. like the ones you find just before you enter the line for the rollercoaster... you know the the ones... hold on tight.. those with weak hearts and bad backs may not want to proceed... take off all jewelry... take off all clothing... be prepared to get wet!!!!!!!!!

[LixyChick]

Oh woe is me.......I am walking through this forest with my picnic basket and I am heading towards Grand-Mama's house.

*oops! Did I forget my panties again????* (Pumping up the volume here ladies!) OK...back in character.........

I just know she'll love these goodies I have prepared. Holy frieolies! *making the aghast look*......Is that a "Big Bad Wolf"?.....(or is my ass a piano?)

OK....these stories are pretty boring without my narration.......back in character again......

I do so hope that a Pixie type lumberjack will come and save me before the Big Bad Wolf comes and eats me all up!

WAIT A MINUTE!!!!!!....."Hi ya wolf, buy me a drink?"

Hey.....a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do! In other words......Any port inna storm!!!!!!!

[LixyChick]

OK.......Well.........let's try this then!

Oh woe is me...........I am sitting on this......um....this tuffet thingy (whatever that is...I don't think I ever sat on one!) and I am eating this delicious.......ah...um.....curds and whey stuff (Blah!) and lo and behold I see a great big spider suspended from what looks like nowhere spindling down from this silky string coming out of his ass (as far as I can tell). Oh I do so hate spiders...they scare the bejesus outta me. I hope a big, strong Pixie type farmer (?) will come along soon and save me from running away before I can finish this really delicious goop I am munching!

I gotta tell ya...I love this thread! Now help us damn it!

[dicksbro]

Not wanting to see any of our fair damsels in distress,
I hop in my trusty vehicle and race to the rescue.

All aboard! :D

[dicksbro]

Just to show the depths of my concern, I set up this special "aid station." See, there is caring left in this world :D

[Aqua]

*Narrator*~ Is Aqua too late to save the Pixies' Damsels in Distress? Will he be able to post in time? Has Dicksbro already saved the day?

(Sorry, I know Superheroes generally don't take days off... but most Superheroes don't have families either... :rolleyes2 )

[Lilith]

*Lilith feigns fainting*

[Aqua]

This might help...

[Lilith]

I was thinking mouth to mouth but that would work too ;)

[hot9000]

here comes your superhero girls!!!! what can i do for you? uups oh i see aqua was here already, so i better leave again. :)
however if i can help you in the future just call me and i be there (if im online) *g*

..your wish is my command..your superhero aka hot9000

[Lilith]

oh a girl (or girls) can never have too many superheroes.....:p

[dicksbro]

Well, ladies, it looks like my job is done. I'll be riding (in my rescue vehicle) off into the sunset leaving Jennaflower waiting at the "aid station" for ya' Aqua.

(Picking up his trusty air guitar, Dicksbro leaps for the rescue vehicle's door ... which, unfortunately ... wasn't open at the time. Stumbling to the driver's seat, the crowd at Dicksbro Dick's listens as he cries out ... "Hiyo Ohio, Toledo, Oh My...O ... here I come.")

[LixyChick]

Oh woe is me!........I can see all the other damsels have had heros cum to their rescue but...............................


*Feigns fainting....backhand attached firmly to her forhead!*


Oh woe is me.........Here I am in this gigantic (really stinky ) boot with all these children running around (as if I am the "Kool Aid" mom) and I just don't know what to do! However will I get a babysitter for all of them so that I can go carousing? OH!....I mean....so I can go to work to make money to feed them all? I think I need some kind of Superhero too!

And BTW Aqua...........that curve you got going on!....Oh babe.....you got it going on! *truly faints (ever so conveniently) onto Aqua's lap, ass first, high above the trusty sword!*

[Aqua]

This trusty sword??? ;)

[Aqua]

Or is it a skin flute for Jennaflower?? :p

[LixyChick]

MY HERO!!!!!!

*THUD*!

[dicksbro]

Fortunately, Dicksbro carefully avoiding the sunset he was riding into, had his CB on and overheard the plantive cry of Lixy.

Woulds't (or however they spell that stuff in the stories) thou seek a brave rescuer. One who is noble, honest, ... and horny as heck? :)

[jennaflower]

oh MY......... I think you all arrived a little too late.. and I must have died and gone to heaven... cuz all I can hear is the wonder sound of flutes...

YUMMMMMMMY........... I REALLY need CPR now... be still my heart!

[dicksbro]

Screeching to a stop by the aid station, the noble hero runs in and takes Jennaflower in his arms, reviving her with a tender kiss and a stiff cock.

"Now, fair one, play the flute as never before!"

[LixyChick]

Gotta say.......I am ROFLMFAO! I have tears streaming down my face! I can't stop laughing! I am gonna pee these knickers! (a Bo-Peep reference).

db.....I am so glad you didn't ride straight into that sun! OMG! (still laughing) And it's amazing the range that there CB get's way out here in Nursery Rhyme land! (still laughing) Oh and what a resume.....Noble, Honest AND Horny as Heck! (still ROFLMAO!)

OK.....omg....here we go again!

Oh woe is me.........Here I am standing knee deep in sheep poop and nary a sheep to be seen! Whatever am I to do? Poppa will kick my butt when he finds I have lost the whole flock!

*Startled look....off to the north* What the heck is going on over there? (Realizing all the sheep are down on the North Fourty and all the farmhands and Poppa as well are having their way with them!) I really need a hero.....One who hasn't dipped his wicket into a sheep!.....To heck with the sheep...I just want a hero again!

[dicksbro]

Having completed the flute tune, Dicksbro stands up ... gives the fair maiden a mushy kiss and says, "Harken, I hear yon plaintive call from a damsel in distress (distress is another word for sheep poop). Her knickers are drenched and need changing and her feet need washing."

Driving next to that yucky pond, Dicksbro uses the super hero crane to reach out and pull our fair Lixy to safety. (He sure didn't want to wade in :D)

"I've solved the problem of your father. Once we've celebrated the rescue, I'll pad thy lovely bottom with this finely crafted pillow." The pillow is much like a chastity belt, but with a one number (four) combination lock. It was safe from dad, he could only count to three.

Turning on Bolero in the rescue vehicle, Dicksbro proceeds to celebrate the rescue. He's heard to say, "I love this hero stuff!"

[LixyChick]

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!.........I can't pee anymore! If I do I just know I will be hospitalized!

It's so amazing that you have a time machine and can retrieve all these new fangled, fancy, machinery thingy's, db! And, WHEW! TY for remembering Poppa could only count to three.......after that farm accident cut off his thumb and index finger on his right hand and his entire left hand as well! (OMG........Pee break!)

What a big....."backhoe" ya have! (Imagining you saying..."The better to pluck you with my dear!")

Hey db...nice tunage! What is that confounded thing that plays thy harp so well? And does it make toast?....I am starving! Not to mention I am.....multi-dimensional....flipping from Fairy Tales to Classical Bolero!

OK.......I have another........(ain't I just a pain in the chastity belt?)

Oh woe is me...........Waaaaaaaaa! Here I hang all the way up in this Giant Redwood in my cradle! I have been here so long I have developed breasts! I wonder if a big strong Pixie type (arborist) is ever gonna come along and get me outta this tree top! These hurricane winds are getting on my nerves and the birds have made so many nests from my basket-like cradle.......I am gonna fall in a week or so since I know this limb I am on is weakening. That's if I keep getting fed these plump worms! Oh my.....I need another hero!

[dicksbro]

The flute player was Jennaflower, she's the first to yell help, looking for Aqua. (Had to do something).

You are lucky, the Dicksbro Care Car becomes erect at times and curves up .. just barely reaching the top of the Giant Redwood and your cradle.

First thought ... "nice breasts." Sorry, that's just a man-thing.

Couldn't help much with the nests, but did line each with newspaper. Dang birds were pooping all over the Care Car.

Either you can climb aboard and we'll wait for a cold shower (makes the erection fade), ... or ... I can catch you when the limb breaks. (Every good hero has a backup plan :) )

(Are you sure that was a worm you were eating?)

Hugs ... :D

[Murphy]

From the Ozarks comes the thunder of mighty hooves and a hearty "Woah Mule! Wooooahhhh!" *Wham* "When I says woah, I means woah!"

*Hopping off the now-dazed mule and striding to the tree, spurs clinking on the ground* Where's this damsel in distress? looking up into the tree and spying her in her pricarious perch..."Fear not Fair Maiden IIILLLL save you!" and using his spurs as spikes he begins climbing toward her lofty bower....

[LixyChick]

As the bough breaks........I seem to float to the ground! Ever so grateful.....(yet skeptical that an erection can reach to the top of a Giant Redwood).....I don't look a gift-hero in the mouth! Instead, I drop to my kness to check out this magnificent "Readwood plucker"!

MY HERO!......(music expanding......."Is that Bolero I hear"?

[LixyChick]

OMGGGGGGGGG........ROFLMFAO Murphy!

*Kissing db and quickly climbing back into the tree......(huffing and puffing as these are mighty big trees)....I lay in my cradle as if I have been here for years!

Oh....alas! A hero with a mule! How can a damsel be so *flippin* lucky? HELP!!!!!!!!

[Murphy]

Climbing faster (Damn this here tree is BIG!) our bearded hero finally reaches the lofty nest....climbs inside and presents himself, bowing and doffing his black 10-gallon hat. "Hear I am to save the day!" then, looking down at her, "Damn, what knockers!" His jeans bulging to mulish proportions.....

[dicksbro]

Allowing the Care Car to return to normal proportions .. Dicksbro fades from the scene to wait for the next rescue call. As he leaves, he once again uses his now famous call, ""Hiyo Ohio, Toledo, Oh My...O ... here I cum."

To which the mule replied ... "hee haw, hee haw" (which, roughly translated means, "those d... birds are missing the newspaper and plastering me.")

A hero's life and that of his mule is not easy.

[LixyChick]

"Hark! ( I sayeth).....I hear the familiar call of Mighty Mouse."

Yep, damn straight bucko! That...."Here I come to save the day" thingy is most assuredly that of Mighty Mouse! And may I say, Mighty Good "mulish proportions" you have there honey pants!

*Tying the last of my infantile blanky on the "mulish proportions", I lower myself from the Giant Redwood in style!* Oh, and um...Murphy.....MY HERO........if you can tell me what color my eyes are (as opposed to looking at just my "knockers")....then I shall grant thee a choice of three keys to my chastity belt (of which I know there is a combination and it is NOT a key entry....and I also know.....only db knows the combo..........and I am pretty sure......he can be bribed!)

[dicksbro]

Oh, FOR shame; super heros can't be bribed. We stand FOR good ... good food, good clothes, good sex. There were really FOUR things we stood for but I can't remember the FOURth.

(I will give you a clue, it's the only number on the combination lock.)

If you're still having trouble, send $5 money order and a SAE in care of Pixies. Make the MO payable to DICKSBRO, SUPER HERO. (Note, all proceeds are donated to the Trojan Rubber Tree Farms Preservation Society but are sadly not deductible ... only withdrawable.)

[LixyChick]

Narrator:

"Is this the end to the saga of our Damsels? Can we possibly be out of antiquated but very malleable Nursery Rhymes? Are our sagacious Super Hero's in the unemployment line? Who will feed the mules? And the big question...........Are mules actually jackasses incognito?"

"For the answers to these and all of your ever arising questions........Stay Tuned!"

JENNA?????? Are we done hun?

[dicksbro]

Gee, Jenna and Lixy, thought you'd like to see the nice note I got from the Trojan Rubber Tree Preservation Society. Just goes to show that good works yield results.

---

From: Trojan Rubber Tree Preservation Society
S.E. Asian Jungles and a Drugstore Near You

Dear Dicksbro, Super Hero ..

Just a note to thank you for cumming to our aid with your recent donation to the Trojan Rubber Tree Preservation Society (TRTPS for short).

We had encountered a rise resulting from our new "For Play" promotion and, given the ups and downs of such a program, we were in dire need of help with containment. The situation was truly climatic.

Your donation in the form of the $5 check was very generous and represented the equivalent of purchasing ten of our new, brightly colored lubricated models done in a fashionable fairy tale style. (The fairy's actual tail costs extra.)

As a token of our appreciation we're enclosing a package containing 2 reconditioned products.

Sincerely,

Fu Kin Hey
SE Asian Pres of Vice

[jennaflower]

LOL.... dicksbro... your good work ALWAYS yeilds fabulous results ;)

I think I might be in need of your expert help again later tonight... afterall.. it is HUMP day....

[dicksbro]

No problem, Jennaflower ... glad to oblige :D

[jennaflower]

okay... as I expected.. I had a hell of a day... never-ending whining from custodial/non custodial parents... (i.e. "Where is MY money", "I Lose my job", "That ain't my kid", "Why'd ya take my taxes?"... etc) UGGGGG...

I would ohhhhh so enjoy some attention from the male gender... and maybe.. just maybe.. I might even reward ya :) PLEASE!!!!!!!!

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dicksbro]

OMG ... a cry for help is heard. Up in the sky a bright circle of light shines on the low-hanging clouds. Is it the famous Batman bat? No. It's the sign of the phallus. This can mean only one thing ... Dicksbro, Super Hero is once again being summoned by a fair damsel in distress.

Checking first his emergency supply bag ... yes ... K-Y Gel; reconditioned condoms from TRTPS; a six pack of Fosters .. a six pack ... where did that go ... how can the rescue mission go without ... okay, there's a bottle of White Zin ... that'll do.

Next, the white mesh muscle shirt; the green tights (donated by the cast of "Robin Hood-Men in Tights"); the bright yellow pouch; and the Nike air-cushioned shoes. Looking into the mirror, DSH mutters to himself ... "I've got to get a new tailor, this looks ridiculous."

No time for that now, it's to the rescue vehicle; where, after a quick run-through the car wash (Super Hero rescue vehicles must always look spiffy :) ); Dicksbro plugs in the fair Jennaflowers address into the autopilot and off he goes.

The crowd down below the speeding vehicle looks up in wonder ... "Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it Superman? NO ... it's a huge prick inside a hot dog bun! Huh? Oh yeah, it's Dicksbro, Super Hero!"

[dicksbro]

The shiny prick ... er ... rescue vehicle glides slowly into the parking place next to Jennaflower's location. A knock is heard at the door ... "Yes," responds Dicksbro in true Super Hero fashion.

"Hey buddy, ya' gotta move this hot dog bun with a big cock in it. Can't ya' see it's a no parkin' zone."

Moaning in disgust, Dicksbro again starts the engine and backs across the lot to a different spot.

Now, ready for action, he leaps from the car and races to JF's front door ... "I'M HERE. Where are those unruly kids and rude parents? Where are those that woulds't (more of that dang story book spelling) spoil the maid's day."

JF points to the adjoining room and DB opens the door ... "Okay, people, we've had enough. What's it to be ... you want to be sprayed with Mace? Shot with the AK-47? or, should I put you all on the premium overtime rate and start charging double for each additonal minute you're here!"

In sheer panic, the throng flees through the back entrance and soon, only JF and DB are left.

Looking at our Super Hero, JF says, "Thanks DB for coming," she says frowning after noticing the damp patch on the front of the tights and pouch. "BTW, where did you get that ridiculous costume?"

What will happen next? Will JF strip our super hero bare and force him to do many depraved and sexy deeds (oh, I like this one)? Having already stained the front of his tights, will he be able to achieve another erection and orgasm? Will he have to use Kleenex to clean up the resulting mess (where is the creativity in that)? Will he get his green tights back (they were autographed)?

Jeanna, go ahead, share what you have in store ...

NOW A PAUSE FOR A SHORT COMMERCIAL

[LixyChick]

db.......Me thinks thou haseth entirelyth tooeth mucheth timeth on thy handseth!!!!! (spell check, damn it!)

I really don't think I have enough water content left in me to pee anymore!! ROFLMFAO.....all too long!

(outta character..........db.........you have missed your calling! You have got to share this humor with the world! I haven't laughed so much in so long........ok...since the days of doing windowpane acid! That's been a longggggggggg time! And this is funnier than anything I have ever laughed at back then!)

Here we go..........

Oh woe is me! What the hell is this plum doing on my thumb? All I said to Momma is, "Oh dear Momma, I would so love to have a plum pie!" I remember Momma handing me a slice and all of a sudden I have this plum stuck here on my thumb. And what the hell does S&M mean? What time is it anyway? OMG.....My butt is killing me! Holy Moly.....that ain't no plum! Oh gawdddddd.....I need a superhero to figure this out!!!! Momma??? Am I still a good boy???

(outta character...........ok...I did say earlier I was running out of tales!) LMAO!

[jennaflower]

dicksbro...

ROFL.. you had me.. the whole time.. waiting on the edge.. ready to take the plunge and pleasure you endlessly.. get on my knees and give thanks for you coming to my rescue.. by taking your cock in my mouth.. feeling it harden under the attention of my tongue...

that was until... you called me by the wrong name.. it isn't Jeanna... ROFL.. it is JENNA!!!! LOL

Today.. part of my day consisted of helping PUSH a friends car onto a car dolly.... lets just say that I would have loved for the man in green tights to have swooped down and offered me a hand.. LOL

[dicksbro]

OH NO, our lovely Jenna heard Dicksbro speak to his niece Jeanna (who was riding in the back of the Care Car). Jeanna had stepped out at the wrong time, wanting to share what she had put in storage, and when asked to share that, Jenna overheard and thought Dicksbro had mis-spelled her name. (Jenna was very perceptive having heard the silent "a" being used in saying Jeanna.)

Frustrated by this, Dicksbro complained bitterly to Jeanna, "I tolds't thou that you should have called yourself Frank ... now ... what am I to do. Thou has't sullied my reputation and the fair Jenna has turned from me."

Suddenly, the air erupted with loud wails and lamantations from Dicksbro. "Damn," Dicksbro was said to have cried, "whys't (?) do theys't plant thorn bushes so close to the parking lot where I coulds't lean against one?"

Jeanna, realizing her failure to change her name to Frank caused the confusion, apologized and promised to start the paperwork immediately to get her name changed. "Should I also-eth seek gender re-assignment?" she asked.

Moved with compassion (all super heros have that in abundance), Dicksbro said, "Nay, twill not be necessary. Unless thou goes't to yon 'Blue Oyster' bar, the name Frank should not cause thou a problem ... unless, of course, you order an ale using that silly German accent. I can hear it now, 'I'm Frank, ein stein bitta.' " People always grab their pitchforks and stuff when you do that."

Having straightened that out, Dicksbro moves quickly to find Jenna and explain this unfortunate mistake.

[dicksbro]

As Dicksbro began his search for the fair Jenna, he noticed a petite young maiden sitting on a nearby bench. Stopping in front of her, he hears her say, "Oh woe is me! What the hell is this plum doing on my thumb? All I said to Momma is, 'Oh dear Momma, I would so love to have a plum pie!' I remember Momma handing me a slice and all of a sudden I have this plum stuck here on my thumb. And what the hell does S&M mean? What time is it anyway? OMG.....My butt is killing me! Holy Moly.....that ain't no plum! Oh gawdddddd.....I need a superhero to figure this out!!!! Momma??? Am I still a good boy???"

Not wishing to leave her in such turmoil, Dicksbro responds. "Aye, young Lixy (her name was't embroi ... sewn ... on her blouse), tis true that tis no plum. Yet, it too can quencheth thy tormenting thirst," he said pointing to the abundant stain on the front of his tights. "And, thouest silly fair Lixy ... thou are not a good boy ... but, thou can surely have all the good boys thou wishes for. Especially if thy quencheth thy thirst on purple nobs like mine."

"And do not worrys't thou pretty head about the time, twill only takest thou a very few minutes to satiate thou thirst, I promiseth thee (damn it's hard to talk like that). For thou sore bottom, per chance thou woulds't like to move over a bit so thou are not sittingeth on the branch of thorns laying there on the bench. Verily, I say to you, that woulds't certainly help alleviate the pain in thou butteth."

Finally, fair maid, S&M is a question that takes much time to explain. Perhaps, once I find the fair Jenna, we can take time and really "tie" into that discussion. Here, takest thou these soft silken cords and go to my residence. Undress and position thyself on the bed with thy fair arms near the bedposts at the head of the bed and thou legs spreadeth and positioned near to the bedposts at the foot of the bed. I'll return most directly to explain all of S&M's finer points. While thou waitest, spend time 'S'avoring and 'M'editating on all thou horniest thoughts and desires."

Think alsoeth of the old saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones ... but whips and chains excite me." :D :D

[dicksbro]

Turning his attention back to finding Jenna, Dicksbro applies his keen, super-hero insight and walks back up to her door and knocks. Soon, his eyes are captivated by the radiant glow of the beautiful Jenna making herself ready for yon shower.

His purple nob, so recently drained, suddenly responds to this vision of loveliness. "Fair Jenna," Dicksbro begins, handing Jenna a package filled with green M&M's, "forgivest me that in talking to my niece Jeanna, I woulds't have caused such great doubt and sorrow." Adding, "Fear not, the problem will soon be solved as Jeanna has her name changed to Frank. Here, accept my again rigid sword of satisfaction as a sincerest form or apology. Could any niece, soon to be named Frank, compare to thou, fair damsel. And, be confident that the next time you want something pushed into thy friend, Dolly, I will truly swoop down and offer thou my hand and my purple nob."

"Now, lettest me bathe thy tender parts with my moist tongue, and fill thou with my moist dick, and fondle thou with my moist ... er ... gentle fingers."

Removing his now sopping wet green tights, yellow pouch and mesh muscle shirt, Dicksbro proceeds to demonstrate his great concern for the lovely Jenna. (Saying "I'm sorry" can be such fun.)

Throughout the evening neighbors keep wondering, "What for is all thatest oooohing and awwwwwing?" Super heros never tell. :D

[dicksbro]

CAUTION ... DUE TO THE STRENUOUS NATURE OF BEING A SUPER HERO, IT IS ADVISED THAT THESE DRAMATIC RESCUE FEATS NOT BE ATTEMPTED AT HOME.

[dicksbro]

Time slipped quickly away. Finally, the lovely Jenna slipped off into slumberland, a small grin on her face, Dicksbro's now flacid cock resting in her hand.

Carefully rising up, Dickbro replaces his cock with a softly vibrating dildo marked with the shining phallus symbol and a note saying, "Hiyo Ohio, Toledo, Oh My Oh ... here I cum ... er ... came."

His clothes way too soaked to wear, Dicksbro planted a light kiss to Jenna's forehead and away he went, jumping into the door of the Care Car. "Damn," he mutters as he realizes the door was shut again.

A lone couple walking down the sidewalk looked up and Dicksbro naked and carrying his soaked clothing heard them say, "Boy am I glad he shed that costume, it looked ridiculous. Even more so dripping all that spunk!"

Staggering into the Care Car, he set the controls and soon was coming to a rest at his residence.

The lovely Lixy was positioned naked on the bed; legs and arms spread wide with the satin cords resting beside her. The moistness between her legs suggests the meditations went well and were truly savored.

Moving around the bed, Dickbro picked up the satin cords and began to secure Lixy's arms and legs to the bed posts. She never moved. Dicksbro was heard to mutter, "Dang, she really savored those meditations. Look at all those juices. Look at those pouty lips. Look at those firm nipples. Look at this boner I'm hosting."

Leaning over the foot of the bed, Dicksbro in his unflinching dedication to helping fair maidens, begins to clean the moistness from between Lixy's legs. Having no towel, he's forced to use his lips and tongue .. but that's okay, he, too, was thirsty. As his tongue probbed the soft recesses, Lixy suddenly clenched her lower muscles and woke up."

"What's happening?" she asked.

"Immm ah hott ah ongue beun helda byum ya lips ..."

"Oh (tee hee)," she chuckled and relaxed enough to free his tongue. "Oh dear me, my hands and ankles appeared to be fastened and I'm forced to just lie here naked with my legs and arms spread."

"Yes, my dearest," replied Dicksbro. "Noweth we can begin the lesson on S&M."

(OMG ... what can possibly come next???? How much spunk can one guy have??? Where are Aqua and Murphy? Doesn't DB's keyboard ever run out of ink??? Don't light emitting diodes ever fail??? So many questions ... so little time.)

[LixyChick]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can hardly typeth...............tears streameth from my eyes!!!!!!! Oh TY my hero!!!!!!


(outta character...........I will BBL..........I have to stop laughing......it is a gut wrenching laugh....and I think the men in the white coats are coming to get me soon! Too F'ing funny db....You have got to start a new career!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

[Aqua]

*Aqua is being held captive by his nemesis, the dark temptress Lilith... and enjoying every minute of it! ;) *

[dicksbro]

DB rests, awaiting the return of Lixy and Jenna.

As he rests, he ponders the likely movie and book rights to this tale of heroism, courage, danger and wanton, unconstrained sex ... especially the wanton, unconstrained sex. Damn, another erection.

(I wonder if Shrek and Donkey will be available? Hmmmmm. Donkey may cost too much, I wonder if Murphy's ass is still standing under that tree getting pooped on by the birds?)

TV serial rights ... yeah ... think of it, a weekly tale of rescuing damsels in distress. Flying cocks in hot dog buns. Green tights, mesh t-shirts and yellow pouches. Tongues caught in tight crevasses ... well ... maybe not on the TV version. (Dang, that was so much fun.)

Hmmmmm.

Hark, was that a posting by Aqua? Yes, it tis indeed. Does he want to be rescued? Surely not. (Quickly double checks the cross-dressing thread.) This is not likely. Especially not when being restrained by the beautiful Lilith, dungeon mistress. Must ponder this new situation and see what develops. Hmmm.

[jennaflower]

I awaken from my deep peaceful sleep.. well rested.. and still a bit sore from the pounding that DB bestowed upon my soft flesh. *sigh* what wonderful things that took place.. on the floor.. on the counter.. between the blender and the food chopper.. oh la la (note to self, better wash those mixing spoons)...

But much to my disappointment.. DB is gone again.. like the super hero he is.. only sticking around long enough to satisfy the needs of the damsel in distress. Oh.. how I would enjoy rewarding him for his efforts. I wonder if he would allow me to do such a thing... I think this Super Hero is in need of a little sexual rescuing himself....

I must figure out away to place myself in danger once again.. to see his super hero self appear just to rescue me again.... looking for any excuse I am... any at all will due...

[Lilith]

* Lilith laughs wickedly and continues to cast her evil spell over the kind and fuzzy Aqua.....:p*

[dicksbro]

Hark, does't Dicksbro sense a maiden pondering a new tramatic situation?

Does't he hear a wicked laugh?

Is there another bottle of White Zin handy?

Did the Fosters get restocked?

[dicksbro]

Did the tights get washed in time to celebrate his 1800th post ...

YES!

[jennaflower]

DB....

as a reward.. not only for your bravery and ability to keep an erection far longer than your nearest competitor... I have indeed restocked the Fosters... but in order for you to get to them... you must get thru me.. and the only way to do that... well... will require you to press your limits... to achieve more orgasms in any one session than ever before... (which will require enough time to allow your tights to be washed). ;)

are you up to the task kind hero???

[dicksbro]

Hmmm. Fosters being held by Jenna. This is a mission of a somewhat different erection. Fortunately, our Super Hero with his close connection with influential people is privileged to have access to an, as of yet, un-released drug called "V to the MAX" made by a certain "blue pill" maker.

A test run is in order. Moving to the men's room, DB takes one of the new VMAX pills. A sudden stirring in his loins takes place. An enlargement of epic proportions; a firmness like that of a cannon barrel; swollen balls like water balloons. OMG ... will he still be called Dicksbro or will he magically become ... yes ... DICKSPRO!

SUPER DOOPER HERO.

Lucky for DB, he's standing before the urninal that's hung lower on the wall ... since lifting his magnificent tool high enough for the other may be a challenge too great.

Testing the ejection mechanism, DB slides his hand over his mammouth member. What control. He senses the choice to ejaculate is now his and can be mentally or physically controlled. What a breakthrough. Electing to try this new power, our hero wills himself a climax. As he begins the thought process, a song comes to mind (to the tune of "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" ...

Take it out of the pants front
Take it out in your hands
Rub it and rub it and let it spurt,
A gallon of cum just won't be any work
For pump, pump, pump little hands do
Making it strain and contract
And there is one, two, three major squirts
From the cock's small crack.

The test is a success. Even more than that, the erection remains and the balls are quickly refilling. Looking at the bottle label, the manufacturer suggests no more than one pill every few hours as each erection is good for five with as many as ten climaxes!

(Hey, it's a fairy tale, ain't it. Could have said infinite hours and infinite climaxes)

Now, time to go visit Jenna.

[dicksbro]

Slipping on his tights, mesh shirt and yellow pouch ... DICKSPRO moves out to his trusty rescue vehicle. Remembering previous experiences, this time he opens the door avoiding his previous tendency to crash.

However, in his glee, he trips on the step and falls forward.

Luckily, the new erection is firm enough to catch him and hold him upright. Saved by his member, he moves to the captain's chair.

"Dang, I can't sit down with this erection," he thinkest to himself. Standing, he lowers the front of his pouch and tights and uses the tip of his cock to enter the location coordinates of the fair Jenna and presses "GO."

"Hey," he thinketh, "that wast fun. Wish I'd washed off that cum before I used it to enter the coordinates though."

The great vehicle immediately begins the trip to Jenna's house. On the way, DICKSPRO carefully washes the excess spunk from his tool. The vehicle slows and it's programming remembers the no parking zone. Choosing a valid spot, the Care Car is carefully parked.

Pulling back up his tights and pouch, DICKSPRO opens the door and disembarks walking up to Jenna's door. Pushing the doorbell he hears the melody ... 'Ding Dong, Here's the Schlong, from a Cute Boy, with a Wicked New Toy." (One must admit, this is quite an unusual doorbell.)

Opening the door, Jenna's thrill was apparent: "OMG, OMG." She reached out with both hands and taking DICKSPRO by his cock she quickly pulled him inside. "OMG, OMG," was her steady refrain. Grabbing the pouch and tights by the waist she stretched them until they finally passed over the erect phallus pointing straight at her. "OMG, OMG. Hurry ... step out of these, I'll throw them into the washing machine."

As DICKSPRO steps from the tights and pouch, Jenna takes them in her hand and tosses them towards the sink. Unfortunately, she didn't look at where she was throwing them as her attention was fixed on the cock in front of her. "OMG, OMG."

Landing on the floor, the tights and pouch just lay there (not much creative and independent thinking when it comes to tights and pouches).

Not so with Jenna. "Hurry, let's go to the bedroom," she said. "Let me ride," she asked, hopping up onto DICKSPRO's rigid cock. "OMG, OMG."

(the sceen changes now to the bedroom)

[Sugarsprinkles]

Originally posted by dicksbro
(Where are Aqua and Murphy? )

Alas, Poor Murphy is being held hostage by the Evil Villain - Telephone Company Man!!

He's being held for ransom...more gold than he or any of us can possibly pay! Woe is me!....Woe is Jenna!....Woe is poor over-worked DICKSPRO!...........OH HELL!! WOE IS ALL OF US!!!!!

[dicksbro]

With Jenna implanted on DICKSPRO's magic wand, the made it into the bedroom and promptly fell onto the bed.

Our super hero pistons his cock in and out, in and out, keeping up the tempo until Jenna shouts out ... "OMG. OMG. (easy lines to remember if this becomes a movie) I'm cumming."

With that as his signal DB lets go with his first climax.

"OMG. OMG. I feel like I've had an enema at the wrong place," moaned Jenna. It was apparent why. Streams of creamy cum oozed from her well processed opening. Rubbing herself, Jenna gets some of the lotion on her finger and takes it tentively to her mouth. "OMG, OMG," she says. "This is great. It's like butter pecan ... no, french vanilla."

DB hadn't considered this possibility ... that the taste would be altered by VMAX. Carefully he also takes a small amount and touches it to his lips. "OMG. OMG. Me thinks this is the secret to Baskin Robbins success."

"I know," Jenna replied. "Damn, this is good. Can I get a bowl?"

"Sure, thou mayest go forth and retrieve said vessel."

Hurrying out to the kitchen, a small liquid trail follows. Jenna returns, concerned that the dripping is slowing down and there won't be any left.

Sensing her fear, DB reassures her. "Fearest thou not, fair maiden. I can replenish that bowl with ease. Woulds't thou care to stroke said member pointing towards that large vessel."

"OMG, OMG," replied Jenna, reaching out to stroke the DB's firm cock. "Cans't thou fair and noble prick really produce more."

"Aye, lass." And, with the fair Jenna's stroking, DB contracts his loins and new gushers erupt. Squirt after squirt.

"Damn, that's really amazing," said Jenna.

"Yes, my lady. Even I am somewhat surprized." Pausing for a moment, DB then asks, "Dids't thou bring two spoons?"

The evening wore into night and the night into morning. Two more VMAX pills were taken and the series kept repeating ... fuck, eat, stroke, eat, suck, eat." Finally, as the sun began to rise on the horizon, the two lovers found themselves exhausted. "Dids't thou enjoy, my lady?" asked DB.

"OMG. OMG."

"Woulds't thou like breakfast," asked DB.

"OMG. OMG. I'm full," rejoined the sweet Jenna.

"Yeah. Me too."

"Can I have the Foster's now? I came ... er ... eight or ten times?"

A soft chuckle from Jenna. "Hee hee hee hee." The chuckle becomes more pronounced ... "ha ha ha ha." Soon, she's ROTFLHAO.

"Does't that mean aye or nye?"

"Nye, dummy, not until I figure how to bottle that stuff."

(What will happen now. Will DB be able to retrieve his Fosters. WIll he want to with such a lusty, beautiful maiden still naked and beside him? Don't miss the next exciting episode.)

Oh wowest ... fair Sugarsprinkles beckons. What to doest. Does DICKSPRO have any more VMAX pills. Is there a CVS Pharmacy close by?

A true super hero must not fail ...

Stay tuned!

[DildoDiva]

LMAO OMG OMG OMG!!!!

BASKIN ROBBINS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *deep gasp for breath*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!


CAN'T BREATH!!! :eek: :whiteghos :redghost:

Heehee *gasp* HAHA *cough* BWAHAHAHAHA! *faints*

[dicksbro]

With the cry of "Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo, O my O ... " our superhero grabs his clothes which are still just lying around on the floor not doing a darn thing for themselves, slips them on and dashes to the Care Car. Entering, he quickly checks his supply of VMAX.

A look of concern spreads across his face ... fear shows in his crystal blue eyes ...

What can be the problem? Nothing has caused this kind of reaction before. What is it. Is he out of VMAX? Is he suddenly having a negative reaction to all the events of the past few hours. Has he lost all desire for ice cream? Is he planning to sell his stock in Baskin Robbins?

He starts to mumble, "OMG. Therest still 10 pills in thus pouch." The message is clear, that means as much as 50 more hours of erections ... and hundreds of climaxes ... and gallons of cum. Bowl after bowl of french vanilla. And with a loud sob ... "NO FOSTERS ."

Even for a super hero this seems ... ahhh ... exceptional?

This is a question of great import. Looking up at the framed document on the wall of the Care Car, DB reads the world of the "Super Hero's Hypocritical Oath" (no, it really wasn't mis-spelled :) ) Tears welled up in his eyes. A lump formed in his throat. His tummy feels a gut-wrenching tightening. Almost by magic the radio comes on (the radio is much more intuitive than those damn tights) and a in a rising crescendo, the chords of Neil Diamond's "Solitary Man" fill the vehicle.

"I must go oneth," DB thinks to himself ... gradually coming to attention. "I must sacrificeth for the sake of fair damsels everywhere. Woulds't I fail, woulds't I do less ... nyeh ... tis not my lot in life. Besideth, what the f**k would I do with all those VMAX pills ... jerketh offeth all day?"

The birds outside begin to sing. The orchestra (where the heck did they come from?) begins to play. People stop on the street and look admiringly at the Care Car ... now erect and shining before their eyes. It is a new day! A new day when good will again triumph over evil. Where sexual satisfaction will reign supreme among human emotions.

(Damn, doesn't it just make you teary-eyed thinking about it!)

Even Jenna has come to her door and with words of encouragement. She's heard to say, "Sure go off and leave me with the dishes and mopping up all that gunk I dribbled on the floor."

[dicksbro]

"First," DB thinks to himself, "I must help Aqua from Lilith's skilled hands."

Programming the Care Car for Lilith's dungeon the shiney phallus in a hot dog bun gracefully slides into the morning sky. (It is, of course, a mystery for you long-time readers, just exactly when this 'car' learned to fly. But being that as it may, it has ... so JUST GET USED TO IT ! :) ) The people watching below wave joyously (they get their parking spot back) and Jenna is seen grabbing a mop and bucket mumbling something about ... well ... never mind).

(Editor's note: Jenna will be surprized to learn that 2 gallons of "french vanilla" have been carefully stored in her freezer with a loving 'fare-thee-well' note attached.)

DB hasn't generally come to the aid of males but for Aqua, already a plan has formulated in his clever mind. He knows he must do something to allow Aqua's pleasure to continue and to allow Lilith to complete her daily dominating repititions done to the accompaniment of one of many daily exercise shows.

Soon the proud prick glides to a halt outside Lilith's domicile.

Entering, DB announces, "Harken Mistress Lilith; harken Aqua ..."

... he pauses ...

"Dangeth, those are mighty fine whips you have there, Lil. Genuine leather?" Several minutes pass by as Lilith and DB discuss the fine craftmanship and where she shops for her dungeon equipment.

Moving back to Aqua who, in his captivity, has a strangely fullfilled smile on his lips. "Hey buddy," he says.

"And a good morning to you to," replies DB. "Don't wanteth to keep thou from your morning whipping, but thought this fine, soothing lotion might come in handy. It both sooths the welts from whippings, and, delayeth premature ejaculations."

His duty done here, DB bids his fond ado ... to Lilith and Aqua who are already back to work on their daily exercise program. "Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo, O My O" is the parting call.

[dicksbro]

During another mental lapse, our hero crashes into the closed door of the Care Car as he attempts to board. It must be something about being pre-occupied with erections and cum and sex and cute ladies and all that other stuff. Anyway, getting up off the ground, DB opens the door and steps inside.

"One more duty before Sugarsprinkles," DB thinks to himself as he operates the controls and takes the great dick-of-prey into the sky.

Soon, as he passes over DildoDiva's place he slips the one remaining share of Baskin Robbins stock into a capsule and lets it fall to the ground just outside her door. (See, super heros don't miss all those little side comment thingy's they run across :D). Actually, the capsule first hit her roof, damaged some guttering, and then fell to the ground. The noise apparently got DD's attention and DB saw her open the door, grab the capsule, look at the damage, and wave exuberantly in his direction shouting something. "Hmmm ... can't quite make it out ... G.. D... something or another."

"Another satisfied reader," he thinks to himself.

[DildoDiva]

Damn, and I was hoping he would make a pit stop. ;)

[dicksbro]

Setting course for Sugarsprinkles, DB ponders how to help. All the "Woe is's" suggest significant action must be taken. Murphy needs gold; SS needs help; Dicksbro needs breakfast; tights need washing; still no Fosters (damn); VMAX pills stare ominously at DB's crotch; the Care Car needs gas and the prices are up; Lixy hasn't thought of any new fairy tails ... er ... tales, and hasn't even offered hers :( ...

Editors note: All you Super Hero wannabes take note. Tis not an easy life you are contemplating.

What to do? Gradually a plan is fashioned. Speaking of which, still need to talk to a tailor about another costume. Green tights and yellow pouches just are not in right now. Need something that doesn't get so cum-stained so often.

While the Care Car's autopilot guides the streaking shaft, DB works diligently at his lab table located towards the back of the vehicle near where Jeanna used to store things. (See how all these stories kind of hold together .. how every detail is important to rememeber?)

[dicksbro]

The Care Carj's thrusting and pulsating doesn't keep DB, still working diligently at his lab table, from hearing the sounds of DildoDiva's disappointment. "Alas, I must remember that plaintive cry on my return from Sugar's."

The great cock has finally arrived. Would have been sooner had it not made a brief detour to look at all the sexy sports cars at "Honest Harry's Used Car Lot." Let's face it, even cars have feelings and needs. Oil, gas, sexual release ...

The concern Sugar feels for Murphys plight is apparent as DB steps down from his carriage, yet, there appears to be a glimmer of hope. She looks down at DB's rigid rod and her natural charms poke through, helped by the sheer negligee she's wearing and the still humming dildo carried in her quivering hands.

"OMG," she says before recalling those weren't her lines. "My gosh," she tries again, "look at those tented tights! Those protruding pants. That pervasive prick."

"Dids't thou needest help?" DB asks maintaining his composure.

"Oh, sweetie," she says through a series of ragged breaths, "let me look at this more closely." Moving closer to DB, SS reaches down and begins to fondle his genitals. "Take it out! Take it out!" she cries.

Sweating profusely, DB mumbles, "Coulds't thou, fair maid. I'm struggling to keep controlleth now."

Obliging the struggling super hero, Sugar bends down and yanks the green tights down to DB's ankles. The massive hard-on sprang loose bouncing alternately against his belly and her cheeks. Reaching behind her, Sugar produces an empty ice cream container. "Jenna called earlier and told me about the french vanilla."

Not wanting to disappoint, but compelled to share the reason for his being there, attention to Murphy's plight, DB restrains Sugars grasping for his dong. "My Dearest," he began. "Does't thou haves't a larger vessel, per chance?"

"OMG (I know, wrong script)," she answered, "Jenna was right, this is amazing!" She reaches back and produces a gallon container.

Using his powerful control, DB releases a flood or product from his loins into the container.

Sugar backs up ... eyes wide ... "OMG. It's golden! It's really golden!"

"Aye lass, thou speakest of Murphy's need for gold to satisfy the evil Telephone villan."

"But, but ..." Sugar stammers ... "but, golden cum?" There was a strong sense of disbelief in her words.

The prodigious flow now subsiding, DB shakes his monster meat while continuing ... "Yes, my lady, my createth mind worked feverishly on this adaptation for the VMAX wonder pill. Now, take this bucket to the Telephone villan and give it to him. His surprize will no doubt be more than most can imagine (how often have you been handed a gallon of golden jizz) and while the shocketh stuns him, flippeth the button on the right and restoreth Murphy's phone."

Amazing stuff isn't this. Sugar sat back spellbound. "Golden cum, golden cum ... OMG ... golden cum."

While she sat there in stunned silence, DB takes the quart and fills it as well, "My lady, think of this cup and remember me. After all, this bod's for you (in the background the soft sounds of a famous beer commercial begin to play)."

As DB turns to leave, he makes a parting comment ... "By the way Sugar, this has a butterscotch flavor. Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo, O My O."

Reascending the steps of the Care Car DB thinks to himself how wonderful it is to be a super hero, "Fair maid is still speechless. No doubt surprized by the ingenuity of her super hero. Now, DildoDiva, HERE I CUM!"

[DildoDiva]

Oh Alas! Myne Heroic...um...hero...is coming to save me from my...um....evil, frigid stepmother and stepsisters...yeah...okay. I musteth calleth upon thyne Fairy Godmother to maketh him a new outfit because hisith tights and patch are justeth not only a fashion catastrophy-eth, but they could be used as ninja-eth weapons at this point from the crustiness of all that golden jizz-eth. Maybe-eth.....Armani?

[dicksbro]

Sensing a twitching twat ... crusin' to a clenching clit ... the super hero speeds forward. This is serious ... no fair damsel should ever be put in position where her clit convulses without the presence of a ... well ... convulsor? Oh, heck, cock.

DildoDiva's house appears suddenly on the horizon. Shingles are vibrating to the point even little sparrows fear to land. The smoke from the chimney puffs rhymically.

Our super hero ponders the meaning of the smokey signals. "Appears to be Apache. Let's see, me wantum willing cock. Could be. Navaho, clit wants tender kiss." After three more translations DB becomes sensitive to the fact the international native american smoke signal language of horny damsels (INASSLOHD) is being used. "Boy, you just don't see that everyday," DB mutters to himself failing to used all the thou arts and whateth evers.

Bringing the shining phallus to a soft landing (soft not flacid), DB steps down and runs to the door. Looking back at the Care Car for a moment, DB is surprised by how soft DildoDiva's door is as he starts knocking. Turning back around, the reason his clear. She's opened the door and he's knocking on her knockers.

"Ooopest."

Continuing, "Where is that itchy clit? Where is that forelorn tunnel of love? Where is it that DildoDiva needs attention?"

"Oh, come on, DB," DildoDiva replies, "you don't know where those things are?"

Realizing he misspoke, DB quickly corrects himself, "What I meanteth twas woulds't thou likest to lie back and be ministered to?"

Being very sensitive, DD sheepishly grabs Dicksbro by his cock and leads him to her bedroom. "Strip off thy ridiculous green tights and yellow pouch and let me ponder that meaty manhood," DD tells the super hero.

With her hands firmly attached to his balls, DB figures this is not the time to question.

"Yes, mamm," he replies.

"When we've finished, I have a surprise for you DB!"

"A SURPRISE?"

"Yes! I think you'll like it."

Loving surprizes, DB quickly takes the fair DD into his arms and lays her back across the bed. Tenderly removing her panties, he begins to minister to her lovelorn privates.

"OMG," she starts to mutter.

(Dang, I really need a new scriptwriter. This 'OMG' stuff is getting old. Self ... I says ... CUT IT OUT.)

"Oh, golly gee willikers," she starts to mutter.

"How does't this feelith," DB asks, gently sucking on the swollen clit.

"Oh, golly gee willikers!"

"And how does't this feelith," DB asks asks using his free hand to apply pressure to her firm pubic mound.

"Oh, golly gee willikers!"

"And how doe't this feelith," our super hero asks reaching up and tweeking the lucious nipples on her ample breasts.

"Oh, golly gee willikers!"

"TIME OUT. Can't you say anything but 'Oh, golly gee willikers!' "

"Yeah, sorry. I was so into OMG that I just hadn't thought hard about an alternative."

"Okay, TIME IN ... ith." DB raises up and brings the moist head of his firm penis closer and closer to her waiting orifice.

"Is thisith whatith you hadith in mindith?"

"Huh?

"Did you want me to stick this in?"

"Oh, yeah. Already the itching is subsiding and no doubt this will help. But," she pauses and questions in a soft voice, "woulds't that stain my pristine reputation."

"Fear not, milady, this is for medicinal purposes only."

"Oh, well thank heavens." DD replied.

With that the penetration proceeded. The undulating motions of two bodies pressing together with feverish anticipation of the climatic moment. Soon, unable to constrain further their bodily demands, the two shouted out together ...

"PRALINES AND CREAM!"

(Not all of you will recognize the origins of this expression, but, suffice it to say, those in closest communication in the chat room have learned these mystical things.)

Soon, it's time to part. True to her promise, DB will no longer wear the trademark green autographed tights or the yellow pouch. Now, he stands proud in the white tights and purple pouch with the new muscle shirt reading "DB" in large letters.

MY GOODNESS, isn't that wonderful! Thanks DD.

[Sugarsprinkles]

Originally posted by dicksbro



"Aye lass, thou speakest of Murphy's need for gold to satisfy the evil Telephone villan."

"But, but ..." Sugar stammers ... "but, golden cum?" There was a strong sense of disbelief in her words.

The prodigious flow now subsiding, DB shakes his monster meat while continuing ... "Yes, my lady, my createth mind worked feverishly on this adaptation for the VMAX wonder pill. Now, take this bucket to the Telephone villan and give it to him. His surprize will no doubt be more than most can imagine (how often have you been handed a gallon of golden jizz) and while the shocketh stuns him, flippeth the button on the right and restoreth Murphy's phone."

Amazing stuff isn't this. Sugar sat back spellbound. "Golden cum, golden cum ... OMG ... golden cum."

"Fair maid is still speechless. No doubt surprized by the ingenuity of her super hero. Now, DildoDiva, HERE I CUM!"

Oh, WOE IS ME!! Our SuperHero has cum and gone leaving his tights behind....and leaving his tight behind exposeth'd to the elements!! "Be careful not to sitteth on any cold seats!!" the Fair SugarSprinkles calls after him.

OH WOE IS ME!! I needeth Golden COIN , not Golden Cum!! I tooketh the gallon of Golden Cum to the Telephone Villian. The Villian looketh't at it and asketh't
"What the hell is this?? And how the fuck do you think this will pay a phone bill?"

I began to wail "OH WOE IS ME!! MY superhero, DICKSPRO generously gaveth all this wonderous Golden Cum unto me so that I mightest bring it to thou to payeth Sir Murphy of MO's telephone bill. And now thou refuseth to accepteth it!! What's a poor Damsel to do??"

The Telephone Villian replied "First of all, quit talking in that stupid Fairy Tale talk!! Nobody talks that way anymore, especially out here in these hills! Next, get you ass outta here with that damn bucket of cum...........and bring us 10 Barrells of Golden COIN ! And don't cum, err...come back without it!"

SugarSprinkles begins to weep and wail (that's Fairy tale talk for bitch and moan). "What oh what am I to do??? I can not payeth Sir Murphy's telephone bill! The Telephone Villian will not accepteth Superhero Golden cum. Yea verily, I must continue to doeth without visiting with Sir Murphy online! I do so misseth his wonderful e-male..uhh e-mail. And on top of that, my hormones rageth out of control!! I am over-sexeth'd and under-loveth'd!! I NEEDETH some serious SEX here!!! Where oh where is a SuperHero without his tights when I needeth him??? OH WOE IS ME!! WOE IS ME!!!":( :confused:

[LixyChick]

OH woe is me...(good gawd I am tired of that too!).....Oh woe is me.........I can see that my superhero is oh so busy these days! Whatever will I do? I am juggling these balls for what seems like days now (OK....I ran outta nursery rhymes.....shaddup! damn it!) My arms are oh so tired but I was told if I stop tossing them.......then the bus will surely blow to smitherines! (Hmmmmmmmmm.....sound familiar?) I can't let this bus blow up! It has great sentimental value to me (as I lost my virginity on it when I was 14.....right here in this back seat!). How long must a girl juggle balls anyway? I am a pathetic juggler....or is that juggleler? I can barely carry a tune inna bucket let alone keep three or more balls in the air! And BTW.........who's balls are these anyway? Oh, no matter.........I just know I am in need of a superhero pretty f'ing soon!

[LixyChick]

BTW.......ROFLMFAO Sugarsprinkles!!!!!!

[Murphy]

SS and Lixychix: ROTFLMAO and LSHIPMP!

From the Ozark hills come that familiar cry of "WOAH MULE, WHOA MULE" *WHAM!* "WHEN I SAYS WOAH I MEANS WOAH!"

Leaving his broken baseball bat balanced between the dazed mules ears, our hero strides toward the damsels...."Fear not I'LL save y'all"....and sizing up the situation he takes The bucket of golden cum from sugarsprinkles and holding her hand they enter Lixy's bus, where he sets the bucket down, deftly catches the juggling balls from Lixy and drops them one at a time into the bucket. Setting Sugarsprinkles on the seat next to Lixy, and standing fully erect he declares "Now that that's taken care of, how else may I help you laides?"

[LixyChick]

Murphy!!!!!!!!!...............oooooooommmmmmmmmgggggggggggg!

My hero!

OK...I'll bite.......what is LSHIPMP? I have to ask these things.......lessen you could be rogering me roundly and I don't know it! A girl has to know........is it it or not???????!!!!!

[dicksbro]

Murphy, owe you thanks. Wasn't sure what to do with that bucket LMAO. Really struggling with the coins. Must be time for a new super hero to take over for a bit. :)

(Plus, the Care Car needs an overhaul :) )

[Sugarsprinkles]

Originally posted by LixyChick
Murphy
OK...I'll bite.......what is LSHIPMP?

Lixy...it means Laughing So Hard I'm Peeing My Pants!!



Originally posted by dicksbro
Murphy, owe you thanks. Wasn't sure what to do with that bucket LMAO. Really struggling with the coins. Must be time for a new super hero to take over for a bit. :)

(Plus, the Care Car needs an overhaul :) )

Sorry to have messed the story up for you dicksbro....:( Wasn't trying to give you something too difficult to follow up on, but I guess that's exactly what I did...OOOoops!

Don't know if Murphy will be able to help out much. His internet opportunities are far and few between, these days. :mad:

Perhaps there's a "Good Fairy" out there that can cast a spell and change the Golden Cum to Golden Coin.....

Calling all Good Fairies!! Or Fairy Godmothers!! Or even a Fairy Godfather............yeah a Fairy Godfather who'll make the Evil Telephone Villain an offer he can't refuse....LOL.....

[dicksbro]

Sugarsprinkles, you didn't mess up the story or anything. Think I was starting to run low on good new ideas. Hmmmm. Maybe once the Care Car gets overhauled ;)

[Sugarsprinkles]

Just checking in to see how the Care Car's overhaul is coming along? Doncha just hate when the garage takes forever to even look at the damn car......not to mention how long they take to finally fix it....after the parts they had to order from the manufacturer finally arrive three weeks after they promised you'd have the car back?. :D:D

[dicksbro]

LMAO...

Actually, timing for repairs is great ... got to report for Jury Duty this morning and not sure if I'll be selected or not. If I am, I might be out of business for a bit anyway. Maybe the cases will give me new ideas :)

Maybe I can help the judge.

Maybe the attorney's will want my unique perspective.

I wonder if the courts can survive this?

In any case, gives time to get the parts in and the car to get fixed :D

Thanks ... and I will return ...

Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo, O My O ...

[dicksbro]

DB, our Superhero, ponders his dilemma. The Care Car still layed up awaiting parts to complete the overhaul. Jury duty is preventing the kind of unfettered attention to his Superhero responsibilities that is so necessary. Cries for help uttered by fair Pixie damsels reaches his keen ears. DB notices a slight jump in his loins which the Judge, administering the juror’s oath mistakes for patriotic fervor (whew). Actually, of course, it was the fondling of the fair lady next to him (whoa).

Anyway, DB ponders where to obtain coin since Superheros do not accept monetary rewards (preferring, of course, wanton sexual favors). And, should he receive any money, he is contractually obligated to donate it to the Trojan Rubber Tree Preservation fund.

Then, there’s the bus that wants to do a blowjob but is restrained by a fair damsel worrying about juggling someone’s 14-year old virgin balls? Damn … this really gets complicated.

Several coin possibilities exist. For example, Murphy could keep changing long distance carriers. These darn phone companies have become so aggressive seeking to move customers from one carrier to another that they’re always offering money if you only switch to their service. Recent studies seem to suggest with careful juggling (there’s that word again), people should be able to quickly move into the upper income brackets without ever actually making a phone call. I digress, but one particular story suggests a lady in Cabot Cove, Maine gave up mystery writing when she found she could pit multiple sales people from the same phone company against each other. Ends up she finally realized net profits of over $42,000 over one weekend and never actually changed carriers. Two people from “Are You Being Served” in London reportedly bought Graces department store after negotiating between two US carriers who didn’t even service their area. Only drawback of this technique, of course, is that it does take a lot of time tracking which company is the next one to sucker in and you can’t stop or someday you’ll get a friggin phone bill putting you right back where you started.

Dicksbro is also negotiating with his fellow jurors. The possibility exists that the Telephone Villan can be put away for several years without actually even realizing he was on trial. Using a little known legal loophole disguising itself as part of Homeland Security, an uninformed jury can specify penalties independent of any charges being brought, as long as it’s done in the name of “goodness.” And, a ruling initially used to document Bill Clinton’s definition of sex, “goodness” can be associated indirectly with any fornication not specifically covered in Section 5.0, Title XVIII, sub-paragraph 3 in the uniform code … a document not actually known to exist. It’s true that many legal puritans say this is not fair, but, no one’s actually been able to figure out how to prove that. In latin, this legal position is called the penile eruptus interruptus, but nobody knows quite what that means either.

In a phone call to another Superhero, the Flacid Flasher, Dicksbro has been able to take on loan Flasher’s “Silver Dong” super car. The Silver Dong was originally designed by Willy’s Jeep, but, it wasn’t until Chrysler bought out Wee Willy’s wand that the battery was added giving the Dong tingle. Now of course, with Mercedes involved the car runs making a curious ummm-paah-paah sound and takes only dark beer in cold steins as fuel.

The good news for Sugarsprinkles is that the Silver Dong is quite capable of stimulating the clitoris until DB gets off jury duty while sitting in neutral. Tough part is rolling the bed onto the driveway and positioning it appropriately. (Nothing good is ever easy.) Meanwhile, DB, or the lady next to him, will keep massaging his own powerful phallus during court ... getting ready for what can only be described as the “FF” (Festive F***).

The bus now is a different problem. It’s getting late and our Superhero must call it a night very soon in order to maintain his shrewd legal perspective on things. So, until tomorrow evening … here’s to happy auto erotica and a powerful, (yeah, you guessed it), ‘Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo, O My O.’

[Aqua]

Alas, what Foul Fiend™ could produce such a diabolical plot involving a juggling bus and fourteen year old balls? Could it be Evil Man... or perhaps Sinistario... or even *glances from side to side and speaks softly* Herbert Humphmore. :eek: So what can a mild mannered Superhero of the sea do at times like this? Well for starters, Lixy needs a break from all that juggling and I need time to think! So I dash to the shore on my purple seahorse, and quickly hop in my Aqua-mobile traveling at subsonic speeds to the abode of the Lix's.
Upon arrival Aqua notes that Lixy is almost unable to stand any longer and he quickly snatches the juggling balls as they continue their rhythmic, infinite flow allowing said damsel to collapse to her knees, (how convenient... ;) ), in front of him. Eager to show her gratitude, (or perhaps she just didn't have the strength to do otherwise), Lixy's face leans forward into Aqua's cock which is somehow now freed from his tights. (Hey, I am a Superhero...) Her tongue reflexively darts out to slide along the length of Aqua's rock hard shaft until reaching the tip, where her lips engulf the head while her tongue continues to caress the underside of his stiff member.
Meanwhile, Aqua continues juggling as the bus continus it's breakneck crawl down the parkway. (It doesn't have to go fast, these balls just need to stay in motion...) Speaking of balls in motion, Aqua's balls are now gently being fondled as Lixy takes more and more of his cock between her lips. He concentrates on his juggling act, but can't ignore the incredible sensations of what Lixy is doing to his manhood. Just as she completely engulfs his cock and touches her lips to the base, she gives one more firm squeeze to his balls and is rewarded with a cascade of cum squirting forth from Aqua's cock. As his balls are drained of their fluid he notices his juggling balls are shrinking. As the last drop of cum is sucked into Lixy's mouth, the balls disappear. A look of panic fills her face upon seeing this, but Aqua quickly confers with his worldwide crimefighter pocket database tool that the bus is no worse for wear! Lixy, in her moment of gratitude, had unknowingly figured out how to defuse this sinister, diabolical plot of... Hmmmmmm???????

[dicksbro]

TA RAH ... TA TA RAH

The trumpts blare as the newly reconditioned Care Car backs out of the garage. Dicksbro, watches the big prick ... er ... vehicle roll slowly into the brilliant light of the afternoon sunshine. Dressed now in his white tights, purple pouch, and muscle shirt reading "DB" in large letters, the Super Hero looks magnificent.

Emerging from the Care Car. Bill Joe Ray Bob, the mechanic, emerges followed by his trusty (and buxom) assistants ... Mary Lou, Billy Jean, Susie Mae, and Miss Prissy.

"Damn, Billy Joe," DB stammers, "You'st got more pussy than any ol' Super Hero."

"Yeah," Bill Joe Ray Bob answers. "Ever since them damn Yankee folks stuck them damn ol' puter thingy's into cars, we became pure classy good ol' boys in the car fixin business. And classy good ol' boys get lots of pretty pussies wantin' to spend time wit ya."

"Billy Joe, what's these repairs going to costeth me?" a sudden sign of fear passing over DB's face.

"Hey, DB, ya' ol' mudderluckin' hero type ... ya' gotta ask ... ya kaint' ford it .." Billy Joe Ray Bob laughs. "Dontcha worry, ya' ol' corn whisky drinkin fool, dis one's on da' big Billy Joe."

With a great sigh of relief, DB responds, "Thankest you, Bill Joe. Thankest you greatly. Your name willith shine among the saints."

"DB, ya' ol' pussy licking, cuny probin' sonna gun, you all just drop off my card whenevers ya' done rescue one dem Pixie babes ... k man?"

"Billy Joe, your job is doneth ... I must now race to the beautiful SugarSprinkles aid ... Hiyo, Ohio, Toledo ... er ..."

Billy Joe interrupts. "DB, cut da crap and get goin'"

DB's mechanic in his own, quaint, colorful way cuts off the Super Hero, wanting him to focus on the hard work ahead rather than the formalities of Super Herodom.

[dicksbro]

*** BUMP ***

I re-read this and had a ball doing so. Thought maybe the rest of you would enjoy as well (Gotta read the whole thing!!!!)

DB

[Aqua]

DB... thank you for resurrecting this one... LMAO... good stuff!

[LixyChick]

OMG!

db sent me a PM that he had been rereading this...and I asked him if he bumped it, so he did so I could re-enjoy it too!

That was last night. As I sat and read it again from the beginning, lmfao and tears streaming down my face (literally), my in-laws came into the house...took one look at me and ran over and hugged me. They thought I was crying in sadness. I could hardly explain what I was doing...just that I was on a site and reading something really funny!

People...trust me on this! It's a long thread...yes...but it is so worth the read (I say this on behalf of all my cohorts who contributed to it)!!!!!!!!

[Cheyanne]

OMG!!!!!!!!!! ROTFLMAO!!!!!

...........I can't believe I read the whole thing!!!!

You guys are great! LMAO<snort>LOL<snort>LMAOPMP

[Master Scribe]

After reading this whole thread I wander over and hang up my trusty mask, vacuum up the cloud of dust and put my pick'em up truck away in the garage......To dang many Super heros about for me. I guess I shall just wait till the ladies of Pixies need a not so Super Hero.....one with a belt of trusty toys..one with somewhat ok timing....
LOL

Great thread


Robert

[dicksbro]

Glad you all enjoyed who read this. I'd forgotten some of the exchanges our merry group had, but it was sure fun while it lasted. :)