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jseal
12-20-2010, 10:39 AM
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to the people here at Pixies Place, but it is difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my brother (who practices law) yesterday, and on advice I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the Winter solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2011, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that my country is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Best Regards (without prejudice)

Name withheld (Privacy Act).

GusAspar
12-20-2010, 01:45 PM
Dear Name Withheld

Receipt of your message (Subject: That Time Of The Year) is acknowledged. Senior Pixies today initiated the formation of a Pixies Oversight Committee for Kissing, Masturbation And Rear-end Kicking (POCKMARK), which will consider an appropriate response.

This acknowledgement should not be interpreted as in any way anticipating a response favourable, unfavourable or anything in between. Claims for compensation on the grounds that such a response, if it is ever issued, may be received after Christmas, Eid, Divali or the birthday of Jimi Hendrix will be treated with the contempt they deserve.

I have already been advised that some members of POCKMARK plan to table an agenda item opposing sending out an email response on the grounds that some Pixies may print it and increase the fire risk at this cold time of year.

Yours faithfully

Lottie Cobblers
Committee Clerk

Lord Snow
12-20-2010, 06:18 PM
Sounds to me like you both consulted the same lawyer. H.M.R. Blockhead.

dicksbro
12-21-2010, 07:41 AM
Cute. Same wishes in return. :D

Pita
12-21-2010, 04:59 PM
Right back atcha Jseal :x: (I sure hope my kissing you doesn't cause offense, but if it does....tough....sue me.)

sodaklostsoul
12-22-2010, 01:40 AM
Merry Christmas