premature ejacultaion...please help

[24mnj]

ok, my g/f and i are in a long distance relationship. we're having sex about once or twice a week, and i can't seem to help cumming too soon. i've seen all kinds of dumb methods and products on the internet, but they all seem like scams.

does anyone know of any actual methods of stopping, or at least improving on premature ejaculation?

[Wicked Wanda]

I have encountered this in date a time or 20.

I view it as a minor issue at worse. I acept the first "quick" orgasm as just that, a quickie to get things along. If it is someone I know has the issue, I go down on him untl he has cum the first time, and then we play, (tongue fingers, etc.) for a while until he is ready again. Pretty much every time the second time (or rarely the third) is more relaxed, and lasting.
If he is first date and I am caught by surprise, I accept it and then see above.

The worse thing to do is for either of you to make an issue over it. I don't feel particularly put out that I turned on someone so much that they came quickly the first time. It's sort of a compliment.


The creams and so on are problematic, and I have had them affect MY sensation as well. Condoms do decrease penile sensation, and you probably should be using them anyway.


WW

[Loulabelle]

I feel like that too, WW. I find it almost a turn on that a guy is so aroused by me that he can't control himself. That's not to say that a guy has carte blanche to be selfish and inconsiderate though.

I've heard it said that if you feel you're getting too close, it's good to stop and change position or change to an alternative activity (like pull out of her, and go down on her for a while, or something like that) but I suggest that if it's an issue for your missus, you should chat with her about how she'd prefer you'd deal with it.

[Irezumi Kiss]

Every time I've felt myself coming close to popping my cork fast, it's gotta be because I'm REALLY wired and feeling it. Because condoms take care of that sensitivity issue right away. And most times it's good enough to feel through them...but the times I've gone bareback haven't been the "instant explosion" sensations of vagina-to-penis that we boys are taught ad infinitum will happen. The first time I entered a girl I really didn't feel anything special that would make me lose my marbles, nothing like the way I felt when I masturbated myself to cum.

It's first and foremost in the mind, I feel. And your mind can dictate control over your cock. For me, if I mentally focus slightly off of my partner and the "event of fucking," I can stay hard without feeling the urge to cum. Then after a while I focus back on myself and start those internal gears going. Sometimes I might be really wired to get off and selfishly keep riding that wave of ready-to-burst energy as holding back doesn't always mean a better orgasm. But if I do that, I know that I'm capable of getting hard again within a good amount of time...and she never need worry about me rolling over to go to sleep. If you get off fast the first time and stay hard longer the second, it can only be a good thing, I reckon.

Masturbating more and finding your own personal mental and physical rhythm to climax is a real can't-miss deal if you want to condition yourself towards having better ejaculation control. And it's one of those special "practice sessions" that no one ever DISLIKES doing, either! :cheerlead

[citrus]

An early bf of mine long had that issue. I thought I could make a difference for him. After a quick bj we'd relax a while. Then we'd try to get him up again. Sometimes he could and sometimes not. I was ultimately frustrated because I wasn't getting my end serviced the way other guys could do it to me. I didn't last long with him. At the time I didn't care and it didn't matter to me. Looking back, I was a bit hasty myself and a greedy fuck. Remember, I'm male. Nowadays I jo a lot with my bf or gf. We are in no hurry. Sometimes when I'm in her pussy I cum instantly. I've learned that if I worry about it it doesn't help.

[Teddy Bear]

Masturbate often and practice holding back. Worked for a guy i know.