Next please

[Booger]

when you are surfin porn what the biggest turn off. The things that makes you just stop watching it and find something else.


One thing for me is when they have the cheesey sound track. I don't have a problem when they have music playing. It's when it only music or the music is the main track and the sounds of sex are in the back ground. Also when the sounds don't match up with what is happening. You can tell they went back and recorded sounds after and add them on.

[Lilith]

prolonged monotonous head.

[Aqua]

Yeah, prolonged monotonous head is fast-forward waiting to happen.

And I also agree with Booger and the dubbed in sound after the fact. Ugh. Or the same moans over and over. Not like a loop, but it just sounds the same.

Guys turning into werewolves is not good either. Not literally, but sounding like it. I've seen more than one where you would swear that was happening, what with the grunting and howling he is doing.

[CunningLinguist]

Guys turning into werewolves is not good either. Not literally, but sounding like it. I've seen more than one where you would swear that was happening, what with the grunting and howling he is doing.

In College, I bout this video based on the screencaps I had seen on Usenet. It was Little White Chicks Big Black Monster Dicks Vol. 5. While the actresses and the actual action was pretty hot, the screencaps did not mention that the audio was dubbed over with men saying "MONNNSTERRR! GRRR! RAWR!" while the actors would growl and roar having sex with petite white women.

The net result. This video made it's way amongst my friends on the college campus as the funniest video of 2000.

My turn offs (besides the obvious):

-Fake breasts, nothing ruins the look of a woman like a bad boob job.

-I usually fastforward through the monotonous and repetitive foreplay. I'm not in college anymore so I don't have all day to be wanking people!

-I don't like any vintage porn. Sorry, but I think 80's and 90's fashion is too funny to be sexy.

-I think wearing a mask is stupid. I can understand it if it's a fetish video or a one time thing, but there's this one gangbang site where they have half of the guys wearing a variety of masks, and it's in every video. Hell, I understand it's hard to hire the heterosexual men for a gangbang film, but really when I see that they have a bunch of guys in video after video wearing a dumb mask it means I should have put in my application. I mean I'll show my face, use my real name, and it will be even more hilarious when I run for public office in Louisiana.

-Cuckholding. No seriously, when the hell did every interracial site and forum become over run with this fetish of the weak white hubby servicing her domme wife and her black master(s). One of my fantasies is to watch a woman I care about get serviced by a group of hung men and even join in the fun. I try to collect porn to reflect this, but lately most of the genre has this lame backstory of husband is a wimp so she goes to the "ghetto" to find her a real man.

And so endith my rant. Does anyone know if I can post this on a blog with adsense? I need to publish to my blog more.

[Steph]

Great thread, Boog!

I've been surfing porn a lot lately & recently realized I love the look of a certain brand of porn (office or hospital setting with the woman in charge). What drives me nuts is the inevitability that they all ruin it with stilted dialogue towards the end.

Also, I rarely watch FMF porn but am dying for more MFM clips!

[Oldfart]

"I don't like any vintage porn. Sorry, but I think 80's and 90's fashion is too funny to be sexy."

What makes you think that 80's and 90's porn is vintage?

The turnoff? Plastic people having plastic sex.

[jseal]

^^ True

[Lilith]

Especially on plastic furniture covers :D

*covers her ears*

[rtctfield]

Crazy, humungo fake boobs. I don't mind a little enhancement, but I can't stand boobs that are the size of my head and look like the implants are filled with plaster. I also can't stand to see the obvious plastic surgery scars.

[gekkogecko]

Repetative looping. I've already seen it, do something else!

[VeryLonelyMan]

Lets see, where to begin.
First off I will third the sounds not matching up, lame music doesn't bother me but if I girl is grunting on screen when she is moaning on audio it is a turn off.

Second, I will also agree with the more than humongous boobs. Now I have known some large chested women, but when they are like a damn beach ball a piece than that is a bit much.

Third, I dont know what it is with porn lately where the guys are slapping their wang on the girls face. How is that sexy, I mean if it is a gang bang scene then sure leave it there but dont whack her face.

Fourth, I again concur with the excessive head comment. I mean i like watching a bit but eventually it does get boring.

Fifth, now let me just say I like being with a "dirty girl" as much as the next guy. But unless you are in a "scene" don't sit there a degrade a woman just cuz you are in a porn. I mean if she starts it or encourages it that is one thing, but I have seen lots of porn lately where the guys are just a$$holes. Not even being kinky just wrong.

Sixth, sex just for the fact that you are getting paid. I mean I know the whole "porn isn't real sex" thing. But the least you could do was to put some effort into it a little bit. I honestly don't like much "professional" porn anymore. Usually don't look like they are having any pleasure what so ever. Am a big fan of homemade/amateur porn. If you are enjoying yourself, then why do it (yes I know money).

[Pita]

I am totally disgusted and will stop watching when there is an anal scene, with no condom mind you, and then a sudden switch to her sucking his cock. Ewwwwwwwwwwww!! :eek:

[Vicious Tease]

D. All of the above


I'm also not a big fan of shaving. I just think grooming should be done before hand. It's like asking someone to brush your teeth for you before you kiss them. Just silly.

[rabbit]

Biggest turnoff is a guy who cannot get hard, despite her best efforts. Why is the guy in the movie?!? Get someone who can get hard!

[Concubine]

Boring women!

it amazes me the amount of flat out uninteresting women they have in porn clips nowadays.

Personally I perfer it when the women are more "into" it, where you can see the girl fucking back against the guy, That and I like loud sex, if I can doze off during the scene, the makers have failed

[CunningLinguist]

"I don't like any vintage porn. Sorry, but I think 80's and 90's fashion is too funny to be sexy."

What makes you think that 80's and 90's porn is vintage?

The turnoff? Plastic people having plastic sex.

No, it's more along the lines of bad hair and lots of it.

I actually like the shaved and/or trimmed look. I personally hate my own body hair, hate getting hair balls when giving head, and if I were in a sexual relationship again I would shave down there again.

Of course, the rest of my body is covered in hair too. I'd get it removed as well, but that would take too damn long.

[CunningLinguist]

Biggest turnoff is a guy who cannot get hard, despite her best efforts. Why is the guy in the movie?!? Get someone who can get hard!

I thought it was the need to be able to get erect and also ejaculate on cue while people were watching that keeps most men out of porn. Heck, I'd love to do my own porn with my average sized penis, but there is the whole being able to get hard on cue and finding actresses willing to do a porn scene with me that's hard.

[VeryLonelyMan]

This may sound a bit silly but one thing that gets me in porn is when you get a movie and it says it has X in it. But you get it and X is not in it or is so short you blink and you miss it.

[sodaklostsoul]

This may sound a bit silly but one thing that gets me in porn is when you get a movie and it says it has X in it. But you get it and X is not in it or is so short you blink and you miss it.
Yup, that sucks!!!!

[VeryLonelyMan]

Again I know it is porn, but i think there should be fairness in all advertising. Including porn.

[osuche]

Any porn video where the sex is *less* interesting than at my house. I mean...I want to learn something or observe something *new*

Else I'd just do it and not watch it! ;)

[Teddy Bear]

I'll also go with... D. All of the above!

The bad music (do they ever play any current, known artists?), the talking/moaning not matching the scene (like those ole black & white spagetti westerns but naked?), the fake boobs, hair, nails, too much make up, and the anal to mouth definetly ewwww!!

And high heels in bed?

Saw one where the guy had white socks on and there was a hole in the heel. Realistic maybe but ruined it for me.

And does she ever do anything besides moan?

[WildIrish]

I've decided that tongue studs turn me off. Especially when they play with them by sticking them out between their teeth.