Breastfeeding: Would you be offended/ would you care?

[mikaylasmummy]

I don't want to seem like I am putting breastfeeding down in any way at all, but I want to ask do you get offended by mother who breastfeed there child in public.

The main reason that I am asking this is because today I went to our local shopping center and I saw several women breastfeeding there children, now this was not the issue the thing that I could not understand, is that there was a baby change room within 10 meters of all of those women.
So my question is would to be upset/offended if you saw something like that???

Don't get me wrong I am all for breastfeeding every mother has a right to choose how they feed there child so I do not want anyone to think I am against it...

[mikaylasmummy]

I put this exact same thing on a parenting forum and things got really nasty, so please try and keep it clean all...

One women even told me to take my stepson out blindfolded so he didn't need to see tit's flopping out everywhere

[dm383]

I don't want to seem like I am putting breastfeeding down in any way at all, but I want to ask do you get offended by mother who breastfeed there child in public.

The main reason that I am asking this is because today I went to our local shopping center and I saw several women breastfeeding there children, now this was not the issue the thing that I could not understand, is that there was a baby change room within 10 meters of all of those women.
So my question is would to be upset/offended if you saw something like that???

Don't get me wrong I am all for breastfeeding every mother has a right to choose how they feed there child so I do not want anyone to think I am against it...

It doesn't offend me at all, and never has. I always think people who do object to women using their breasts for what God actually devised them for, i.e. feeding a baby, are total hypocrites. After all, it is very rare to see/hear these self-same people spouting forth about Page 3 of The Sun or the Daily Star, for example (tabloid newspapers here in the UK, who have pics of topless women every day, for those not "here"!) and how 'obscene' it is to see pictures of these nearly naked young girls. Which pictures are, by the way, accessable to anyone able enough to open the paper!!

In my experience, women who breastfeed actually show less of their breasts than you can see on the average holiday beach - with the possible exception of Baghdad's main beach............. anyway, as regards there being a babychange facility within 10 metres - So?!?! As you say, it's a babychange; why should these women lock themselves away til junior's finished, just because some neanderthal can't handle a baby doing what comes naturally? (Not a dig at anyone here, btw)

Oops...... a bit Non-PC there!! I feel quite strongly about tjhis, as youm may gather. In point of fact, it is now illegal in this country to discriminate against mothers who wish to breastfeed in public - though I haven't heard of any woman "pushing" this anywhere - yet!

DM

[Casperr]

I'm with Dm on this. I really can't see why people get botherred by it. I never even notice it when I'm talking to a mum and she plugs a baby in mid-conversation. I only get awkward about it when the mother is awkward - and then it's more sympathy for her rather than offense.

Breastfeeding a grown adult, now that's a different story. Where to I queue up?

[IowaMan]

Nope, not offended by it. Definitely not something you would see everyday in the area where I live but when I have seen it it hasn't bothered me. Just sort of a momentary, "Whoa.... is she?????" and then it registers with me and I go about my business.

[wyndhy]

nope, don't care, not offended.

and i wouldn't want to eat in a bathroom either.

[Lilith]

I would not want to eat in a public restroom so I would not expect a baby to.

[scotzoidman]

Never been offended by a woman using her breasts for their intended purpose, nor should I or anyone else be...of course, I'm not offended by breasts showing for any reason, but I do get offended by people who think that all nudity should covered up, like we're somehow born clothed & that should be the default...

I remember a few times some minor discomfort when we were among friends who were breastfeeding, but that was about my hangups, not theirs (it also might have had something to do with the fact I had had secret fantasies about some of these women, but again, not their prob)...when my wife nursed my firstborn, I felt a certain pride at being able to observe such a loving and natural moment...& also was amused at the discomfort of both of the grandfathers, who both took great interest in our wallhangings suddenly ;)

[gekkogecko]

Hey, yesterday, I was in a bookstore, a very publci bookstore, and in the children's section, there was a woman sitting in a chair breastfeeding her baby.

I thought it was so cool that nobody around seemed to have a problem with it. Maybe there's some sanity in the world after all?

[Lilith]

I remember a few times some minor discomfort when we were among friends who were breastfeeding, but that was about my hangups, not theirs (it also might have had something to do with the fact I had had secret fantasies about some of these women, but again, not their prob)...when my wife nursed my firstborn, I felt a certain pride at being able to observe such a loving and natural moment...& also was amused at the discomfort of both of the grandfathers, who both took great interest in our wallhangings suddenly ;)


That was a beautiful thing to say about the Mrs.


ha ha I remember that pained look on my F-I-L's face :p

[scotzoidman]

That was a beautiful thing to say about the Mrs.

It was a beautiful thing to see.

[WildIrish]

I've never been offended by having someone nurse near me.

Like everything else, it's a matter of how it's done. If one is discreet and considerate of the discomfort nursing may cause others, then it shouldn't be an issue. Mrs. WI nursed everywhere we went. In the shopping malls, in the high school halls (sorry...bad Rush quote), wherever we were when the baby needed to eat. She'd use a baby blanket for some privacy and though people knew she was nursing...we never got any stares or comments. Nothing but respect.

[cherrypie7788]

It doesn't offend me as long as the woman isn't all "in your face" about it. Like showing off, "look at me, I'm breastfeeding -- in PUBLIC". I came across a lady like that back home in a mall and she looked like she was just daring anyone to say anything to her, and she wasn't being discreet about it at all.

That attitude offends me, the act however does not. I doubt I will ever breastfeed in public but those are my own hangups talking.

[WildIrish]

That attitude offends me, the act however does not.


I guess that was the idea I was talking about. Thank you for stating it the way I was thinking it. :)

[PantyFanatic]

I hardily encourage the offended to inhabit locations with berka protection.
:starwars:

[PantyFanatic]

....I thought it was so cool that nobody around seemed to have a problem with it. Maybe there's some sanity in the world after all?
I believe that when the 'offended' most likely choose to have somebody else read their thinking TO them, it is unlikely you will find them in a book store.

[Aqua]

I concur with the statements set forth before me by my peers.

Breastfeeding is how babies are intended to receive nourishment. I think it's silly for people to get up in arms because a woman is feeding her child.

They better watch out... you don't know where these breast feeders will strike next! :rolleyes2

[osuche]

I'd not be offended. I might look the other way out of politeness - not sure most women want people ogling them while they try to take care of business. But I would not be unhappy that they were breastfeeding.

Most baby changing areas are disgusting - I would NOT want to feed my baby in a place like that!

[Loulabelle]

I've just finished breastfeeding, and the reason I used to be quite happy to do it in public was because:

a) I was usually with someone else who didn't necessarily want to sit with 135490984 other children while feeding in a parenting room, and in some cases there wouldn't be enough chairs for the other person to sit, as other Mums were feeding their babies

b) nappy change rooms stink of other babies nappies - would you want to eat smelling that smell, or would you want to sit for 45 minutes smelling that when there was an alternative of a nice cafe

c) they are often VERY busy with no spare seats

d) I often tried to do it around a mealtime for us, so that the whole day was not spent sitting down feeding either us or him - you don't get much shopping done when that's the case.

e) I was immensely proud that I was determined and disciplined enough to breastfeed for the first 6 months of my baby's life. I only gave up because it became clear that he was no longer interested in feeding from the breast and was becoming increasingly miserable on the little milk he was taking from me. I wanted people to see that I was doing what is undoubtedly the best thing for my son, and exercising my right to do it wherever the f**k I pleased.

f) I believe that more women would breastfeed if they saw more other women doing it, rather than them thinking of it as somehow 'weird' or sexual.

h) I think it's vital that children (especially boys in fact) get to see women breastfeeding, so that they learn about how wonderful a woman's body is and how much respect women deserve. It's important that boys/men don't just see women's bodies as sexual and that they aren't such a mystery. If boys get to the age of 13 and have never seen a breast, they are going to be far more interested in them as some kind of 'forbidden fruit' than if they've seen them plenty of times before and regard them as just part of life. Children who are shielded from all kinds of nudity are more likely to grow up with body hang-ups and awkwardness when it comes to sex etc, than those who've grown up seeing the human body as a normal, natural thing. If your child asks questions about it and you are embarrassed then it's YOUR problem, not his. Maybe it would be good so that he grows up with a different viewpoint from your own?

[wyndhy]

myyyyyyyy moooommy milkshake makes all the babies jump...
:D

[lizzardbits]

AMEN Lou!!!!

I breastfed both of my children and I will most definately be feeding "Little Mayhem" the same. I had no qualms about breastfeeding in public, in fact I had a sling style baby carrier that acted quite nicely as a cover while I breastfed. I was able to walk around with my baby in America's largest mall, while feeding her, and no one was the wiser.

When I was in university, my sociology class required us to write a paper on us doing something that was out of the social norm (without breaking the law, of course). I was still breastfeeding my 15 month old (The World Health Organization reccommends breastfeeding to two years old) So I chose to breastfeed in public and record peoples' reactions. One middle aged woman looked away in discust, however I got several nods of approval, and a few giggles from a group of pre-teen girls. I think that I had a very good expierience. I also got a high grade on my paper.

I would rather see moms breastfeeding in public, comfortable with their bodies, and comfortable in knowing that their babies are getting fed the best!

[Loulabelle]

Great for you Lizz!

Oh and just a footnote - until you've actually done it, you won't know how hard it can be to be discreet at times - you have no control if your baby decides to pull from the breast and look around leaving you exposed, or if you are very large breasted and your baby is still very tiny, his head might not cover much of your breast. I also found I had to support by breast with my hand, and no amount of rolled up towels, balled socks, etc would do the trick. I did TRY to be discreet, but I imagine there were probably times when others around me thought I wasn't. It's HARD to be discreet with F cups at times as poking your breast through a tiny space of fabric in a nursing top can impede the milk flow and cause blocked ducts/ mastitis and that's NO fun.

In my experience, I fed in front of a few male friends who seemed slightly unsure of themselves at first, but I'd either make a self-deprecating slightly apologetic joke about having to strip off or just chat normally so that they didn't feel they were interrupting some terribly intimate mother/child moment and they instantly relaxed. My brother-in-law and father-in-law used to keep their distance at first, but eventually they got to the point where I genuinely believe they didn't even notice what I was doing. My f-i-l even patted my little one's head on occasion during a feed, probably without even realising what was going on.

I never got anything other than respect from people while feeding, but I do believe that an air of confidence is key - if that seems like doing it with attitude, that's probably because, some of us women HAVE attitude and that doesn't change just because we're Mums.

[Jax]

I am good with it as long as it is done in a way that is at least an attempt to be modest.

[Oldfart]

Fine, so long as it's not that aggressive "fuck you I'm doing this and here's spit in your eye" stuff.

A discreet drape's not a bad thing if you're walking and feeding.

[Cheyanne]

I too used a sling with my youngest. I could go anywhere and no one knew what I was doing, or if they did, nothing was said. I breast fed her until she was 1 1/2. She would let me know she wanted some 'ninny'.

To me there is a difference between being discreet and 'flashing' because you want to be defiant of other's expectations of what is appropriate or not. I don't like it when people stare at me when I am eating, why should a baby? LOL.. just as I won't eat in a bathroom, I didn't feed my daughter in there too. The sling and a receiving blanket worked wonders!

Oh, I wasn't small breasted during that time (nor am I now) and with the appropriate top worn when out along with nursing bras I didn't have to unbutton or fling a boob out either..

[LixyChick]

I just hate that this is an issue. The hang-ups of some people are way too deep. It's a breast for crying out loud! It's a food source...NOT A SEX TOY! Mommy isn't out there moaning and groaning and cumming! She's feeding her hungry baby! She isn't flashing "you"...she's nurturing her child! PUT YOUR EYES AND MISGUIDED THOUGHTS BACK IN YOUR HEAD!!!!!!

The people who have issues with breast feeding need a shrink!

[Loulabelle]

((((((((((Lixy)))))))))))

My thoughts entirely - who cares if people are even doing it in an 'in your face way'....if it didn't offend you, you wouldn't consider it to be 'in your face'. It's a fact of life, why should we be made to feel ashamed or embarrassed about doing it, or feel that if we can't do it discreetly, we shouldn't do it where anyone can see. Yet in society it seems fine for a 15 year old with a great body and a 'nice rack' to be walking around a shopping mall in hotpants and a bikini top -an underage girl using her sexuality to get attention - now THAT'S obscene.