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View Full Version : What is he thinking???


Kaelynn
05-01-2005, 08:25 PM
Ok everyone... I need your help... There is this guy that lives next door that I really like. We have talked to each other a few times here or there and decided we wanted to watch a video together. I didn't hear from him for awhile until I suddenly received a drunken phone call out of no where. I laughed at him cause he was wasted and then made plans to get together again to watch Halloween, my favorite scary movie.

Well a few weeks go by and I finally make it to the library to pick it up and I call him and tell him I have it till Sunday so we need to get together sometime that week. He suggests that night. I was like ok, sure why not. So he comes over, he is sooo sweet kisses my cheek and holds my hand while I am curled up in a ball on my bed squeezing the life out of my pillow. Which by the way he took the floor until I pulled him up into my bed. Anyway, we started making out and he was really respectful of where he put his hands avoiding certain areas and keeping his hands on my shoulders or my back. The best part is he was an excellent kisser, definately on my top three list. He has the whole hair pulling thing down to a science... ANYWAY

A week passes, I call to see what he is doing and he is at another party getting wasted and I tell him I am going to watch a meteor shower and asked if he wanted to join. He said he would meet me there and he never showed up, he was so wasted he lost his cell phone for a little bit. When he found it he called and I was already at home in bed, he told me he had something for me. So I told him if he wanted to come over he could. An hour later he comes over, he brought me beer... Why did he bring me beer you might wonder... well a week before I told him I needed one cause I was stressed... so it was his way of providing a need I guess. Anyway we ended up having sex, after which I told him that it was a mistake cause I wanted to do things differently with him. I wanted a relationship...

So there was the background now here is where all of you come in...

A week after we slept together, we are talking online. He tells me we need to talk, but not then cause surprize surprize, he was drunk. Well I go for a three hour walk cause I was hot and sick. When I got back I instant messaged him and asked if he was upset with me. He tells me that he was so wasted he doesn't really remember what happened last week. I was like ok... Then he accusses me of telling everyone that I slept with him. Apparently he thinks everyone in his dorm knows, everyone in his frat knows, and everyone he knows, knows.

THIS is a crazy thought... I told 3 people, My roomate, My co-worker, and a friend who lives in the house with me. Now I know none of them talked and the only reason I told them because I wanted their advice, I was ashamed of what I did I wouldn't go shouting it from the rooftops, we had only hung out twice and then I slept with him, I wasn't exactly proud of myself.

But here is the kicker of how I know that none of the people I talked to told him anything... He apparently was called an Ass for inviting himself over and forcing his way into my bed with me, and for taking advantage of me. I wouldn't say this! WOULD NOT! Everyone I talked to I only said good things about him, I was just ashamed of myself...

So... what do I do now... I still like him... I want to hang out when he hasn't been drinking. He is a good guy that has a low self esteem at points, for example I would playfully tease and it would really hurt his feelings. Any suggestions would be appreciated, I understand this is a long one thanks for your time...

~K~

Sharni
05-01-2005, 08:33 PM
Honesty...like it or not...my opinion

He's a pisshead sowing his seeds

Kaelynn
05-01-2005, 08:39 PM
Basically you think I got used...

Would you believe me if I said he isn't like that? I have heard from several sources... internal spies lol, that even though he is in a frat, he doesn't do the random hook up thing...

He is really hurt by whoever said this to him but won't tell me who said it... so I am left clueless. He told me his oppinion of me hasn't changed and told me to drop it and let us be friends... He still thinks I did this, how do I prove I didn't??

Sharni
05-01-2005, 08:49 PM
His seemingly constant state of drunkedness would concern me...As to what i think it really doesnt matter....i'm not the one interested in him

Prove it...not really sure you can

Spies can be double agents *LOL* dont forget that

cherrypie7788
05-01-2005, 09:07 PM
Would you believe me if I said he isn't like that? I have heard from several sources... internal spies lol, that even though he is in a frat, he doesn't do the random hook up thing...

It sounds to me like maybe you're in denial about that. Looks like you did get used. Staying away from him is probably the best thing you can do.

And, by the way, I'd be more concerned about his drinking problem (yes, it is a problem) than anything. If he supposedly cant remember what he did (I find this EXTREMELY hard to believe), then do you really want to be in a relationship with this boy?

He needs some time to grow up, because he's not ready for a relationship.

You deserve much better.

imaginewithme
05-01-2005, 09:08 PM
I don't think you'd want a "relationship" with someone who is more worried about drinking and what his friends think he's doing.

I'm sorry you're having to go thru this.

Best wishes!!!

Lilith
05-01-2005, 09:39 PM
(((Kaelynn))))

I'm so sorry but he was a poor choice. You deserve someone who does not play games and make shit up to escape something he started that he is obviously not man enough to finish honestly. We have to kiss a few frogs before we find a prince. Let yourself heal then start smooching again ;)

Mercury_Maniac
05-01-2005, 10:29 PM
he obviously said something that he shouldn't have to someone when he was wasted.


happens all the time.

Mark Vieth
05-02-2005, 12:39 AM
Well Kaelyn where to start. Ok, it would seem to me that he probably drinks to escape certain things that have happened in his life. Now if that is the case, then he has some issues to deal with before he can really make a go out of anything. I am not sure if you want to help him through that if it is the case.

If you and him like each other and you want to make something of it, then tell him on the condition that he stops the drinking. (You'd be surprised what men will do to stay with a women.) If he cares enough about you at least, he will stop. Then once he does that, you should be able to build something from that. Be weary though that he could very easily slip back into his old self and you'll be right back where you started and then you'll really think that you have been used.

Being a guy myself and seeing over the years how much my own father used to drink I have seen how it can destroy people just as much as it destroys relationships.

Personally before I went on this venture with him again, I'd ask myself some very serious questions.

1. Is it worth it?
2.Will he change for good?
3.Do I really need this sort of crap at this point in my life?

If I found myself in the same situation I'd show them the door very quickly. But as I am not, I hope what I have said helps.

fzzy
05-02-2005, 01:52 AM
Hi, like others, I'd be worried about the drinking .... I'd also like you to think about that it seems that it is you that is contacting him each time ... I was told some time ago by someone with a whole lot more experience in love relationships than I've ever had ... if he doesn't call often (or contact you in whatever way) he's not really interested in you ... might be interested in hooking up in some way, but if he's interested in you ... and you've done your part to let him know he's not going to be rejected (which you obviously have), then he'll be in touch ... in the meantime, go looking for someone who is a good guy AND doesn't mind his friends knowing that he's spent time with you!

Freya
05-02-2005, 11:56 AM
Kaelynn, Are you sure he's good for you? He seems kinda unstable.

Kaelynn
05-02-2005, 02:46 PM
All of you have basically told me what I thought myself and also expected to hear... I guess I just needed to hear it from you guys.

The only thing I regret about the situation is I feel like he doesn't even know me. He has no idea who he dicked over, or what kinda of girl I am... that's what sucks the most. You don't dick a girl/guy over you don't know... they might have been your dream, or nightmare, but you never know till you give them a chance. Wish I would have had mine.

I guess I just need to consider this a new lesson learned...

Lilith
05-02-2005, 02:59 PM
Years from now he may look back and regret his actions but for now he's just too young dumb and full of cum.

You can count your blessings for finding out his true nature sooner than later. I'm sorry you had to be hurt:(

wyndhy
05-02-2005, 03:30 PM
I guess I just need to consider this a new lesson learned...


that is a wonderful attitude! :sun:

it is often the bigest lessons in life that must be learned because they just can't be taught. they also happen to be the most painful ones.((((hugs))))

txgrneyes
05-02-2005, 04:41 PM
Sweetie the best way to show him what kinda of girl you are is to be yourself with others. When the "relationship" that you want comes along and he notices that you are happy there will be a part of him that will say "damn, I could have had that."

Regardless of what men say, they always look back at the girls they have been with and wonder about them.

Just my opinion.

Natalie

Mercury_Maniac
05-02-2005, 07:10 PM
"Regardless of what men say, they always look back at the girls they have been with and wonder about them."


True Statement

cbass1976
05-02-2005, 10:28 PM
sounds like he is a dumb ass

Kaelynn
05-04-2005, 12:08 AM
"sounds like he is a dumb ass"

well put... lol... I am begining to believe that as well...

DangerousPet
05-05-2005, 03:59 PM
aww, kaelynn!!! *hugs my dear*
ha i'm glad you are doing better now than the last time i talked to you.

Motto of my life:
Boys are dumb, throw rocks at them :) haha they even have tee-shirts made that say that. i love it!

Regards to what happened:
You're a better person for taking it as a lesson learned than a failure. because in no way was it a failure if you learned something.

Rock on sister!

~Pet

Kaelynn
05-06-2005, 11:26 PM
Well I think everyone will be as excited as I was to hear this news... I finally found out what happened with crazy boy.

Turns out that he told his Big Brother in his Frat... he (the big brother) then turned and told everyone else in his frat as well as friends in his dorm. So Aaron finds out and blames me... amazing... After which he swears he didn't tell a soul!!! Blame the girl it's always her fault apparently... NOT THIS TIME! I told him I wasn't that kind of girl!!

God I'm glad that all this happened and I am NOT with this asshole!

Belial
05-07-2005, 05:43 AM
I thought it might have been something like that...funny how "I never told a soul!" turns into "I only told one person, and they *swore* secrecy!"

Anyway, :x: and :hug: aplenty for you Kaelynn :)

Kaelynn
05-07-2005, 11:22 AM
Belial you rock my world, I love you :x:

Mercury_Maniac
05-07-2005, 11:26 AM
Motto of my life:
Boys are dumb, throw rocks at them :) haha they even have tee-shirts made that say that. i love it!


~Pet



ouch!