how do you get a conservative to play

[lilone]

me and my fiancee have been together about 2 years now. I am the adventurous one always wanting to try new things and experiment and he isthe conservative just happy with the same ole same ole. Anyone have some tips for me?

[Oldfart]

You don't get him to play, you lead him by baby steps.

Find something he likes a little off-beat and develop it.

Nestle an egg against his prostate as you go down on him maybe?

You know him, use that knowledge.

[dicksbro]

I don't know what "same ole" exactly means ... but I'm assuming something like the missionary position? :confused:

Oldfart has a good idea. Maybe wake him with some soft kisses in some erotic places during the night. Or, sneak up behind him when he's looking at something and wrap your arms around him, caressing him. Maybe sit at his feet while he's watching TV and lay your head in a strategic place.

Lots of fairly nice, gentle ways of maybe getting his hormones flowing before he quite realizes it's happening. (I know those ideas would work with me. :D)

[wyndhy]

that's is good advice...try passing along a sexy story or two, as well.

[imaginewithme]

I am more adventurous than my husband, it just takes talking and telling what you really wanna try. Communication is important, even in the bedroom.

[lilone]

Thanks for all of the replies and advice i will get to working on it :D hopefully things will move forward a bit.

communication can be a problem somtimes when it comes to sex. If i didnt knowany better i would say that it embarasses him.

[cowgirltease]

If all else fails get him drunk and attack him. :D

[dicksbro]

If all else fails get him drunk and attack him. :D

I like it. I like it. :D

[Scarecrow]

If all else fails get him drunk and attack him. :D


That would work for me :devilish:

[cowgirltease]

Works for me everytime! :D

[BIBI]

If all else fails get him drunk and attack him. :D

LOL....my thoughts exactly! Yet not too drunk ;)

[lakritze]

Stop what you are doing and slowly without raising suspition find the nearest exit and run to a safe shelter.Then buy a plane ticket from Fla.to Cal.and then look me up.I'm a liberal and I love to experiment.

[pfittowhimsey]

You might try using a magazine, vid, or even another conversation as a jumping off point to comment on how this or that really turns you on and then, if you'feel brave enough, ask him if he'd try doing "that" with or to you....
Another possible way to get him going would be to tell him (in a sexy and horny way) that you had "the wildest dream about you and him..." and be sure to let him see that you're really turned on just thinking about it.
Really though, if he just won't kick down with seriously intimate and healthfully unpredictable passion, you may want to reconsider your marriage plans. Some folks aren't creative themselves but a lover with a wild hair now and then is a joy to them. Other folks are a little hung up about outcomes, responsibility, being blamed/ridiculed/damned etc... They need our help learning to let go in an emotionally safe place with no judgements etc... Often we can help them by example.
But also, sadly, some folks are just lazy. They may even know the joys of uninhibited, consentual adult play but they're just not motivated to expend any energy there- neither for themselves, nor their spouse. What a pitty and a damn waste of time! If your man is one of those...warn him once or twice then if he's still a nogo, run for your life.
Good luck, good love, I'm thinking you'll bring him around ...there's no medicine for blah fuck like rocking that fuck's world!

[osuche]

I have the same problem. Mr. Osuche is very...conservative....and frankly has a lower libido than I do. Here are some things that work for me:

1. Be suggestive, not slutty. If he's like Mr. Osuche, he'll object to suggestive...but he'll keep watching because he's fascinated (his mouth indicates a complaint, his eyes will tell you to continue)

2. Describe something that would make you really happy if he tried....and then encourage him gently to make the attempt. If he loves you, he'll want to please you

3. Set up an elaborate system of quid pro quo...or do what I sometimes (jokingly) do...ask him to pay a "toll" (such as kissing you or something else) every time he does something that is a bad habit of his

4. Catch him unaware and seduce him

5. Start talking dirty during sex. It will encourage him.

6. Whisper suggestions in his ear.

7. Have a no-holds barred...."what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" weekend.


Good luck!

[Callie691]

i have the same problem as you do lilone. And i simpathize. i like the ideas in this thread.they are honest and from some of the greeatest people on this site. i particularly like this comment... If all else fails get him drunk and attack him. And would like to try it, but my hubby doesnt drink. now what? maybe i should slip him a mickey! (that is a joke! seriously) i wouldnt do that to anyone.

[acepen]

What are you trying to get him to do?

[lonelyarmywife]

maybe putting it in writing. Send him a card or something (prefereably at work...the feeling will stick with him all day...) and on the inside, write what you would like to do when he comes home...

Of course if that doesn't work, there's always cowgirl's advice. It's been my experience that enough bacardi will break even the strongest man. :devilish: