wATS THE SCREAT??

[Violator]

Hey all im a new face (well always read the posts but never bothered to register) this question is for all you ladies out there. i need to know if what im doing is wrong or not.
Well im 18 rite now but dnt let that fool you people thimnk im way older 4 my age well fact of the matter is that I cannot make my gf orgasm, and ive been tearing my hair out because is it me or is it her. Ive had experiences of making a female orgasm before by just real close stimulation. but for her ive tried every thing and it still can not seem to work. We talk about sex and every thing we r close and open. every thing is there in the relation ship apart from that help pls. Tell mee the secret!!!!!!!

[Lilith]

First off wtf is a SCREAT?

[cowgirltease]

LMAO I think he means secret. :D

[Lilith]

Oh fuck! :grin: :rofl:

[Lilith]

And I'm going to be a teacher, I should have figure that one out!

How are you stimulating her...fingering, oral, intercourse?

[cowgirltease]

And I'm going to be a teacher, I should have figure that one out!

How are you stimulating her...fingering, oral, intercourse?

Oh gawd you got me laughing so hard i got tears in my eyes.

I'd say to an 18 year old......... Don't try to rub the paint off the barn. :D

[Violator]

Oh fuck just made a fool outa my self didnt i?? on my 1st post ahhh well, Ive done it all. Fingering ive found the spot she likes best and i use that to my advantage when i really wonna excite her.
Oral: I could eat her out for hours on end coz i love doing it and she loves it too. i make circular motions around her clit and then lick her clit whilst fingering, or i just go out and give her a tounging action.
Intercourse we can go for ages and ages untill our bodies are sweating coz im more determined to make her cum than i am 4 me, if u know what i mean. and maybe im inadaquate but is 8inches enough??

[Cheyanne]

OMG!!! ROTFLMAOPMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like CGT said...keep it gentle.

And, as you say, your communication level is good - perhaps investing in an egg or bullet for her and let her experiment on her own at first and then introduce it into your lovemaking sessions. Sometimes part of not being able to orgasm isn't in the stimulation but rather in the mind- she may be holding back because the sensation is so very new to her. Be patient with her too...she needs to get to know her own body and responses without feeling your frustration at her lack of orgasm...

Also, not all women orgasm by penetration alone but need additional stimulation on their clit. It really doesn't matter if you are 4 inches or 8 so don't worry about your size.

[cowgirltease]

Maybe you need to quit bragging and start asking what feels good to her.

[Violator]

seriously i dnt think im bragging im very nieve and i really dont know what is right or wrong as i said before communication is what we have best and what i do is what she wants me to do. I feel that i dont know ne thing and I read other posts alot so i just want to find another way to approach the situation like cheyanne kindly told me

[Lilith]

I would suggest she get herself off for you and show you how she does it.

[Violator]

ok thanks but she does that but she cnt make her self either. so r they things i can say or do to improve the situation??

[Lilith]

Nope...sounds like she is going to have to get this one sorted herself. Best thing you can do is just love her and be patient and not make a big deal about it.

[Violator]

;) thanks alot, its me loving her that makes me want to do it soo bad coz i really want to make her happy. I dont make soo much of a big deal about it but i know at the back of her mind she does

[cowgirltease]

a vibrator will help her. Tell her to use it on her clit and to RELAX. I think she may be self conscious if you watched. I know would if it was my first time. I'm sorry if you think I wasn't being kind but when a guy starts tellin me how big his dick is thats a turnoff for me.

[Cheyanne]

If you continue to say and or do, you may find that she will become more frustrated and that can hold her back. She needs to learn that she shouldn't worry about pleasing you and your expectations of her and start concentrating on what she is experiencing and feeling. Again, I would get her a bullet and let her experiment with the sensations alone without you hovering over her. She needs to learn about her body with out being pressured by you... believe me - if she is more relaxed and understands how her body works it will be good for the both of you in the end.

[Violator]

I would take that in mind sorry if i turned u off i wasent using it as a bragging tool, there is a myth about sizes ect and i donno if it is true or not or what sizes women prefere as i have never spoken about size to another guy. I just trying to find ways in telling my gf that i luv her :)

[Shadow_Kitty]

Nope, it really makes no difference as to your size unless it's smaller than a finger, but then I suggest you see a doctor about that one...:p

On the topic of your girlfriend's lack of orgasms, I think CGT has a good idea that she needs to relax. If that doesn't work, I'm not sure...it could be biological...:(

[Violator]

Dam dnt scare me like that :(

[cowgirltease]

I would take that in mind sorry if i turned u off i wasent using it as a bragging tool, there is a myth about sizes ect and i donno if it is true or not or what sizes women prefere as i have never spoken about size to another guy. I just trying to find ways in telling my gf that i luv her :)
Honey it's NOT the size that counts. It's how you use it. All it has to be is HARD.

[Violator]

Yes mam
Btw id like to say thanks to all u lovely ladies for helping me out. Thats y I love women always here to help a guy out in a time of need. Wot would guys do without women

[Cheyanne]

Why is it, when some men feel as if they are unable to give a woman an orgasm that sometimes they feel there must be something biologically or physically wrong with the woman, especially if they feel that they have a larger than average cock????

Women aren't light switches that can be turned on or off by a flick of a finger.

[cowgirltease]

Well darlin I'll say somethin for ya. I think you're a pretty good guy for taking us 3 women on tonite. Welcome to pixies. :D

[Violator]

Lets not get too personal now but im sure men do think its their problem aswell but well their "macho" tendencies lead them into covering it up by blaming the woman
(im on no 1's side ne way, coz ive got the problem)

[cowgirltease]

What do you mean too personal???? You just asked us how to get your girlfriend off????

*walks off scratching her head*

[Playful1]

Not all guys feel they are too small length wise. Besides if you get too long its just going to hurt her. Width is a nice thing to have (or so I have notice).

As for her...beleive it or not she may simply not feel comfortable with you. Even if she says it, Even more so if you are getting anoyed that you can't get her off.

Stop thinking like a guy where we can hump a tree and get off, women need to relax and work up to it.

[Lilith]

* having a visual* omg LOL

[Cheyanne]

* having a visual* omg LOL


OMG!!! ROTFLMAOPMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[cowgirltease]

Omg Roflmao!

[Shadow_Kitty]

That reminds me of something an old friend from home used to do. His slogan was "go hump a tree" - hell, he used to even have a SIGN that he'd wave at you that said GO HUMP A TREE. LOL.

Anyway...if anyone misread me and thought I was blaming the girl, sorry again. I wasn't...I was saying that if she couldn't make HERSELF cum, then that's either psychosomatic or biological...

[Cheyanne]

Anyway...if anyone misread me and thought I was blaming the girl, sorry again. I wasn't...I was saying that if she couldn't make HERSELF cum, then that's either psychosomatic or biological...


Or could be that she is just new to the sensations and needs to learn about her body which is totally natural and nothing to get scared about...

[fzzy]

It is not at all uncommon for a woman under 25 to have difficulty in having an orgasm .... there are many possible explanations for that, including that her body may still be maturing internally .... but my guess is that if she's not been able to bring herself to orgasm yet that she needs the time to get comfortable with her body and the sexual expression of her body. Maybe she's not comfortable with being "out of control" or maybe there is a moral code that is deeply etched into her being and it feels "wrong" to her currently ... the best advice I've heard so far is let her experiment on her own, get comfortable with herself without having to worry about you or your feelings or being watched, etc. so that she can figure out what works for her ... and that may not be a days, weeks or months kind of answer ... it will take her as long as it takes her ... I wish you well in the process.

[Violator]

awwwwwww shit :whack:

[WildIrish]

Rubbing the paint off the barn and humping trees? Sounds like a party to me!

[LixyChick]

Welcum to the nutty world of Pixies, Violator!

18 is very young...even if you think you're more mature. Most peeps your age think they are "more mature beyond their years". We can't live beyond our years unless we experience the many things that older, more mature people have already experienced. Experience makes for maturity. And, even though you didn't mention your g/f's age, I suspect she is quite young and rather inexperienced as well...correct?

With that said...I have this advice for you. Live and Learn! There is no one magical secret to make ALL women orgasm. No decoder ring, no secret handshake, no prayer to the gods, no dance in the light of the full moon...none of that! All women are different. Like snowflakes, we might have the same physical properties but, no two are exactly alike! Even identical twins can have discerning differences that set them completely apart from one another.

With time and experimentation you'll discover that one thing, one day, will make for a good orgasm...and then the very next day she might not like it anymore. It's not all about the final goal (though the final goal is precious and good). It's about what feels good in the moment and how comfortable and enjoyable it all is in the moment. If you put pressure on yourself, and then therefore her, to "make her cum"...it's not enjoyable anymore. They tell couples who are trying to have a baby, but can't get pregnant..."relax and it'll happen". Sorry to use that example...fore lack of a better one at the moment...but, RELAX and she'll eventually orgasm. Believe it or not, we [women] can enjoy making love even if we don't have a "grand finale". The more comfortable we are in a moment...the more enjoyable the final outcome...no matter the outcome.

Just go with the flow hun...relax and enjoy every part of your g/f and let her enjoy every part of you. Drink in her beauty and appreciate all of her. Tell her that her touch feels "sooooooooo good". Touch her tenderly, till she tells you "harder". Touch her firmer at times, tills she tells you "softer". Tease her pussy with your tongue, and then move along up or down her body...till she tells you to get back to it. If it's lasting an hour and she isn't enjoying it any more than in the beginning...move along! Go fast...then slow down...or vice-versa. Ask her if you are going too slow or too fast. DON'T pressure her to know, and then tell you, what your next move should be. She may not know till you do it. Instead, ask her if what you've already done is something she'd like you to continue. Look for body language that says..."that feels good" or "I wish he'd move on" or "OUCH" or "mmmmmmmmmmmmmm". She may not be able to verbalize some things for her own personal reasons (shyness, religious upbringing, never having experienced it...etc.), but her body might tell you anyway. Observe, experiment and enjoy...without pressure on yourself and/or her to "make" it happen.

In essence...DON'T TRY TO BE A PORN STAR TILL YOU'VE ACTUALLY BEEN A PORN STAR! Might surprise you, just how much you have to learn!!!!!!

Hope this helps! And may I say, I'm happy to see you posting and hope to see you round the boards!

[scotzoidman]

Sorry, I got hung up re-reading Lixy's post over & over...mmmm...oops, hello...now I'm back again...

All I can say is to confirm a lot of what's been said here already...in my experience, many women take a while to get comfortable enough with their bodies to have that total mind-blowing orgasm...sadly, some never do...but that doesn't mean that any of them can't enjoy sex with a loving caring partner...while the "big O" is a wonderful & desirable thing, (again, just my experience) most women seem to enjoy the journey more, as opposed to some guys who think the destination is the key...

[cowgirltease]

Eloquently put Scotz! :thumb: