Sexual Awakening?

[osuche]

Was there a moment in time....or a series of moments...that transformed you from someone who was indifferent about sex to someone who was focused on mastering the art?

Was it a person? An inner journey? Pixies? Something else? What took you from an indifferent lover, to someone obsessed with slaking their need?

How long did the process take? Or is it a cyclic thing with you ~ when you like it, it's good....but you're often indifferent?

I'm very interested in your responses....especially responses from the guys. I am trying to understand my own sexual journey ~ through exploring others' ~ and I am also trying to find a key to sparking someone else's journey.

Thank you for your responses! ;)

[IAKaraokeGirl]

For me, the quality of my sexual experiences with the men in my life has depended upon my emotional relationship with them. I, unfortunately, began the sexual road at an early age, and, more unfortunately, did not have a good "teacher." When I first *really* fell in love--I *knew* I was head over heels--I *immediately* wanted to make myself the most desireable person I could be. I read books, worked on my mindset...and it shows in a *total* change in attitude both in and out of the bedroom.

I'm not sure this helps you, osuche, but I do understand.

[Casperr]

Was there a moment in time....or a series of moments...that transformed you from someone who was indifferent about sex to someone who was focused on mastering the art?
Yep, puberty!!
But actually I've always been a sexual person, ever since I can remember. I can rememebr in primary school looking at the 'human body' books in the library and giggling at the naughty bits!

CasperTG

[Lilith]

The beginning of my sexual awakening came when I first found this place. Until then I was, well I was a prude. It's through talking to people here that I began to see that it was not only ok to like sex but to explore more to find out what I do and don't like. I had a "no list" a mile long but now I just have a few firm boundaries. I had also quit my job and began to live my dreams around that time. I am not sure whether my awakening was purely sexual or if that just happened to be one aspect of a complete spiritual awakening and time of greater self-awareness.

[Oldfart]

Agree with CTG, puberty.

[Pita]

I have been a sexual person since puberty too. Being married to Stud has only made that grow since he is very sexual and has always expected me to be also.

In fact I thought we were fairly kinky in our sex life until I started coming to Pixies and a couple of other sex boards. It has been a very big education for me and I have been on a renewed sexual exploration now for almost a year.

It is also very satisfying to be able to approach hubby with a new idea and have him look at me in surprise. The poor man don't know what has got into me lately. Things I never would consider doing now turn me on. :)

[imaginewithme]

There was a period of time when I didn't want to have sex at all, which put a strain on our marriage, (luckily he is understanding) but it was health reasons. After a surgery to clear up some of the problems, it was almost like the doctor left the switch "on". It was completely different and I couldn't get enough of it. Coming to Pixies helps too, mostly the stories for me.

[Cobalt]

I have always been veeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrry, sexual (at least I wanted and tried to be) but the ones I was with were not. This in turn led to alot of frustration on my part and haveing to abuse Rosy and her five sisters to a point to where it is a turn off most of the time now. Now it is just for relief when I really need it. I am still mentaly very sexually minded but in the last couple of years have had thoughts of trying things that I never would have. I have this theory, You can;t say you don;t like something unless you have tried it. I am very open to trying things especially sexually. I love anything to do with sex. To my limits that is, and there is only a few of those.

[WildIrish]

I didn't enjoy sex until I was around 19. The two experiences I'd had prior to meeting Mrs. WI were technically sex but not sexual at all to me. I'd always been interested in sex, and from the looks of things in movies and print...I knew I'd like it, but it wasn't until I found someone I loved that I really discovered just how much. But then again, I was 19, and having sex with someone that cared about me...not really an awakening.

I consider myself to be an open-minded lover that is interested in trying it all, but care about my partner's hesitance not to push too hard. The advice forum I was a part of for three years prior to Pixies helped me to draw parallels between other people's sex lives and my own that put my thoughts and desires into perspective. Pixies, however, woke me up. The people that comprise our online family showed me that it's ok to be me. I'm sure they're regretting it by now, but it's too late...the cat's out of the bag. :D

I am comfortable taking pictures. I feel able to speak freely about my wants and needs, both online and with Mrs. WI. And I understand that just because things I'm interested in trying aren't part of mainstream sexual desires, doesn't mean they're weird.

Thank you all for bringing some clarity to my dirty little mind. ha ha

[osuche]

All I can say is wow....Thank you for sharing a little bit of you with me. :)

I should have known that you were all naturally sexy....that it was an inner journey getting there....and that maybe Pixies helped out a little. And I must say that all of you have turned out wonderfully sexy. Even you, WildIrish. :p

IAKG ~ Your experience most closely mirrors mine. I was in love ~ and I wanted to make sure that he *loved* having sex with me. I wanted to become the best lover on the planet....and I've done LOTS of research to get where I am. I am sure I'm not the best, but a lady can dream. :)

Lil ~ Your expereince is closest to Mr. Osuche's. And I have seen him relax a bit, now that he is persuing his dream career. So maybe he is awakening just a bit. :hot:

Either way, I think sex is a good emotional barometer -- both a reflection of your internal mood, as well as your relationship with your partner.

[wyndhy]

i have never felt indifferent about sex or sexual pleasure, giving or receiveing. i've always been kinda hot under the jeans, if ya know what i mean. ;) the discovery of orgasm was pretty early in life for me and once i tasted it i was hooked. even anal pleasure was an early discovery. i just plain like sex. i like the exploration that goes with it, and i love the pleasure i can give and the need i can create. pixies helps me get over my shyness about it discussing it. i used to just *do* things and listen or feel for those bodily responses that would tell me i was doing it right. but now it's a bit easier to communicate, to say it out loud... "like that?" or "can i?". who knew that such little questions could make sex even better. so i guess it's been more of a journey from shy sexuality to confident sensuality...and...i'm still on that road.
interesting question, osuche.

[joys]

I was pretty conservative in my high school ages and regret it.

The summer I graduated high school, a friend of my elder sister came to visit us from UK - Margareth. I took her to Cappodocia and we shared a tent. I had no sexual ideas when we went but she gave me a lesson of sex that changed all my thoughts about it.

But still, i was conservative from now here i speak.... until i met this Lebonese nypho girl whom i had a group sex with. That opened a new wide thing to me.

This is my 2nd marriage and my wife knows my interest although we have not tried yet. She was willing when we dated but seems not like so now and i dont want to be pushy..

[BigBear57]

I've always had a zest for sex but late in my marriage health reasons caused a pretty severe crimp in my expressing it. I've had several partners since but emotional ties or lack thereof seemed to limit the length of exposure. The last couple of years has been a sexual nap... I'm hoping for another awakening soon.

[Scarecrow]

I'd have to say the '60s, you know make love, not war. :sex:

So I had to try both :rolleyes: LOL


Much more fun to make love.

[flutelady]

I've always been interested in sex, but not even close to where I'm at now. In my younger years, I enjoyed it just fine, but was ok with having it just occasionally.... if at all.

Then I hit my 40's. I met up with a man who had been very dear to me decades earlier, and although I didn't engage with him, that was the moment that my true awakening began. Feelings, needs and desires surfaced that I wasn't even aware were within me. I'm very hands-on and love to love and be loved... but I can't do it without an emotional connection, it just wouldn't work for me. Thankfully I've got a strong emotional connection with a man who means the world to me. Now all he has to do is kiss me and I'm ready... poor baby :hot:

[Aqua]

I was sexually aware well before puberty. I remember being excited (not aroused though) when my ass rubbed against a girls' as we scooted past each other between rows of desks. The thought 'we rubbed butts' kept echoing through my head (seems I had a thing for asses very early on, lol). A year or two after I was sexually abused by a male babysitter and that continued for a few years and that seemed to increase my desire for a sexual encounter with a girl, though I was very shy, so while I didn't have sex with a girl until I was 15, I had been thinking about it for several years. And as it turned out, my first time was a 3-way.

So I guess for me it was a series of events that awakened me sexually, although I don't think I was ever all that much asleep... :p

[osuche]

The first time I had sex I was 13...almost 14...and I did it because I was in love, and curious. It was a pretty good experience ~ and I picked the right guy, he is wonderful ~ but I didn't really begin to *crave* sex until I was in my 20's. Before that, I craved kissing and cuddling, but not sex....

Recently, I have been accused of being a voacious sex lover. LMAO ~ certainly true when considering my history

[rabbit]

I guess you could say that I was a late bloomer. I didn't lose my virginity until I was 19, when I went away to a college at a well-known and large state university. Through my high school years I was pretty much an introvert. I played sports and studied and that was it. It wasn't that I couldn't get dates...women found me attractive...it was just that I was shy and had a fear of rejection. So, I just kept to myself.

My low point of pathetic: I ended up taking my first cousin to my senior prom since I didn't have the nerve to ask anyone else. Predictably, it was a miserable experience.

So through my high school years, outside of "making out", it was just me and Mr. Hand...and we got along just fine. :p

Then, went I left home, something happened. I began to come out of my shell. Perhaps it was the fact that I lived in co-ed dorm...I dunno. I just became more at ease with myself and others. By my second semester, I decided to join a fraternity. This introduced me into a social circle that was new and exciting...unlike anything I'd ever experienced before.

The way I lost my virginity was a mistake. We knew each other only for a couple of hours before we ended up back at my room, both of us really smashed. To this day, I do not remember her name.

For months thereafter, I had deep feelings of guilt and stupidity. But, over time, these feelings passed and I became more confident in myself and who I was as a man. I went on to experience a wide variety of sexual situations with women much older and younger , of differing ethnic backrounds, and even group sex. I even slept with a man once, though I learned that being with a man isn't for me (I'm just too damned hetero)...I was still glad I tried it.

All of these events during my college years helped me to grow as a sexual person and a lover.

So, I suppose there wasn't any one event...my awakening happened over time.

:)

[Cheyanne]

My experiences with sex started when I was 18. Like a few mentioned before - sex was linked to my emotions of wanting to be loved and feel loved by the person I was with. There was no exploration or experimentation - just straight sex. I wasn't in a position where I could express my desires to try certain things - wasn't confident in myself or my relationships to even express any desire to do so - even though I had those thoughts, I guess I felt like a "bad girl" to even think of those things.

The relationships that I had ended badly - I was cheated on by each and every one, emotional and physically abused as well - and that was a blow to my ability to trust anyone, much less express any hidden desires to them and exposing myself to even more emotional pain.

It was a leap of faith for me to enter into another relationship, but the one that I have with Cobalt is all that I have ever wanted and hoped for. I can be me, and I am not afraid of sharing anything about my secret desires or exploring and thinking of new things and letting him know. Pixies taught me that thoughts that I had aren't bad, but pretty normal and to talk about them is an ok thing to do with your partner. The fact that Cobalt loves me to distraction really helps too! I feel confident enough in our relationship to tell him things that I might be interested in trying - he tells me things too and gives me room to mull them over without any expectations on his part. He will even make suggestions or give me new ideas to think about - he is much more "worldly" than I am.. lol

LOL - and the fact that when I tell him his eyes light up and he groans a little makes me shiver... I anticipate my sexual awakening will continue because of his encouragement and love.

[cherrypie7788]

I was a virgin until a few months ago, actually. I've always been sexual, I gave my first blowjob when I was in 8th grade and was addicted ;)

In high school, I was with three guys that I gave blowjobs to, made out with and let them finger me a few times, but I'd never let them have sex with me. I was also with a girl several times in high school, she's the one I had my first orgasm with. I'm no longer really interested in (most) women, so she doesn't really talk to me anymore :( :( I don't know if she feels bad about what we done or if she just moved on to better things, either way I feel bad about it.

Also, in high school I was in a horrible relationship that turned me off to sex and "love" in general until I met the man I'm with now. I love him, and I don't feel bad about telling him what I want and I shamelessly do what he requests ;) He waited a LONG time to have sex with me (until I was ready) and I really respect and love him for that. He taught me an entirely new view on sex.

[Loulabelle]

For me, I have always been a sexual person....and I mean always......for as long as I can remember, I have played out sexual fantasies in my mind, when I was very young (four or five years of age) it was based on snippets of things seen on TV (just a scene of someone kissing etc would intrigue me) and as I got older these fantasies and scenarios became more and more complex. Once I'd had my first orgasm, aged eight, I have been fascinated with all things sexual, and read voraciously to gain as much information as possible on the sexual act.

However, in my last relationship, for the first time in my life, I began to lose my sexual curiosity.....I was bored by the kind of sex that was on offer to me, and I lacked the trust in my partner necessary to make our sex life more exciting. He didn't know how to respect a woman as sexual as me, so subsequently, I became a less sexual person, in a subconscious attempt to maintain his respect. This, of course, failed as did the relationship eventually, when another person entered my life who simply re-awoke the sexual side of me, which had been dormant for about three years by this time.

Since then I have learned not to take my sexuality for granted......I cherish it and nurture it (something Pixies is instrumental in) and make sure it's something I always make a lot of effort with. I do have worries about the sexual side of my current relationship, since I know how much effort is needed to maintain a good sexual relationship in a long term situation. Keeping sex interesting and exciting once the novelty has worn off is not as easy as it may sound, and takes commitment from both sides.......for me it's an ongoing issue.

[dicksbro]

I think even when I was young (grade school), I was curious about sex. I remember in Baltimore back in the fifties (7 or 8 years old), some of us boys would walk home from school and there was a construction site on the way and we'd peek into the shack they had on site and marvel at the nude pin-ups on the wall. It was somehow very exciting.

By high school, I think I hoped for a first sexual encounter but the furthest I ever went was petting ... even with that wonderful girl that became my wife in 1963. She was my first true sexual experience and I'm glad. I have no regrets that she has been the first and the only girl in my life.

But, I still enjoy flirting and the fun-loving nature of Pixies. Pixies has really been liberating by making it okay to have fun and share with others about sex. And, while my wife doesn't use the computer at all, I do share with her a lot about the site and some of the terrific people I've met here. She thinks of a number of you as friends, just as I do.

[lizzardbits]

When i was rather young, i snuck into my older brother's bedroom and snooped around. i came a cross a Penthouse, or Playboy, that he had stashed. There were these beautiful women that were naked and showing off their privates and touching themselves. so from then on, i had it in my head that to be beautiful, i had to touch myself like that. That in turn, lead to the discovery of orgasm. I was only 6 at that time, and didn't even know what it was called. I remember thinking that i shouldn't do "that" anymore because if i ever had to go to the doctor that i would be found out.

I had sex for the first time with a guy i barely knew, but i just wanted to lose my virginity just to get it done. That was 2 weeks before my 16th birthday. It was ok, but i knew that there had to be more fun to be had. I went on a sex spree then, to find a guy that could bring me to orgasm during sex. All were disappointing experiences; they just wanted to get in, get off, and be done. I then got pregnant at 19 and we got engaged and moved in with each other. It was then that i had my first orgasm during sex. It was great, and i wanted him all the time, and i was lucky if i got it once or twice a week. 6 months after our son was born, we broke up and i moved out.

It was then that i had a good friend from High school move in with me. One night, as we were driving home from work, she confessed that she was a lesbian, and she had a crush on me. I had never thought to sleep with another woman, but that night we kissed. It didn't feel dirty or wrong like i thought it would, it felt good actually. We became lovers and it was some of the best sex i have ever had. I fell in love with her, but living in a small Iowa town where there were many "Upstanding church going folk" that wouldn't understand us. It wore on our relationship. We were tired of being secret, but we couldn't afford to move to a bigger city where we could walk hand in hand down the street. We broke up and i moved in with my parents for a while.

Meanwhile my son's dad wanted me back, so i did the rebound thing and much later became pregnant with our daughter. Again that didn't work out, and i became so jaded about sex and love and all that mess that i didn't want to find anyone else. Oh, he and i would have sex now and again when we were horny, but i stayed away from any possibility of finding anyone, because i had it in my head that i wasn't worthy enough to be in a relationship. So i would develop crushes and became very good at fantisizing about them. of course they would never know. I got very good at pleasing myself with the stories i created in my head.

I shared one of my stories with a gal pal of mine once while we were drinking, not expecting anything, just doing a round of truth or dare, and the story wasn't even remotely related to her. That ended up as a good 3-some with her, her boyfriend and myself. And then again another several months later. :D

And then, THEN, i was introduced to Pixies (again, thank you Lost!) and i found myself coming back to life! Sex isn't such a blase' thing for me anymore. But more than that, i found that i was interesting to people. All of my friends here have been so hot, i mean welcoming, and that i am a sexy woman again. I have so much fun here! And the biggest bonus of it all, is that I found a wonderful, sexy Pixies man who takes my breath away! (Kisses and hugs to you, Babe!)

So for sexual awakenings, i have had a few, but i went back to sleep again, but now, NOW, I am fully awake and ready to take the bull by his horns! And show off my boobies every now and again, tee hee

Love you all, Lizz:D