Screw Management

[Jaded_Slut]

I've had a really rough couple of months. So, of course, I tell my boss, so that he understands why, if I call in, I did. And since then, he asks every now and then how life at home is going and if anything's getting any better.

Well, to add to my personal life...shit at work is getting out of control. My restaurant's grapevine is so fucked up that you could tell one server that her hair looked nice and two weeks later the story is that you two got into a fight and kicked each other's ass. -_-

Anyway, the rumors are flying about me and my boss to the point that I just couldn't handle it anymore. I really do have feelings for him and I think that's why I find it so hard to listen to what people are saying about us.

The other day, I tried to quit and we ended up talking for two hours about why and how I shouldn't and I can't really afford to start over in some new place...

This is where it gets me...My boss has that whole "I don't talk much. I'm not the whole buddy-buddy type with people" attitude...and I understand that, but at the same time it makes me feel like when I talk to him about what's going on that I'm just an annoyance or I'm inconveincing him. He says that he cares, but I can't get him to understand that I don't need an "authority figure" caring for me, but that I needed an actual friend...I don't know how to tell him and it's frustrating.

I'm not that insecure, but when it comes to him, my self-esteem just plummets. I know that I like him, but one part of me just seems to know that he doesn't feel the same way. And another part says that he's just humoring me and whatnot...I don't know what to do. I'm to the point to where I want to get away from him and that damn place, but then again, I don't want to leave, because I'm afraid that I'd never get the chance to talk to him again...

I just need some advice...I would appreciate it more than you would know...

[Steph]

It's funny, I was just organizing some papers and came across something I wrote when waiting for my boss to call back a few months ago. It made me laugh though I really wanted him to call him at the time.

Perspective is everything. You don't like the grapevine - go get another job.

Never stay at a job because you think you won't get to talk to someone from there again. If you don't keep in contact there are several billion people out there. And, you'll meet new people at your new job.

I know it sucks but it seems like you need/deserve more attention than you're getting right now.

[cowgirltease]

Hate to tell you this but, mixing business with pleasure NEVER turns out well. Been there done that. If you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen.

[Lilith]

It's not the boss' job to be your buddy and it would be irresponsible of him to be your lover. I have crushed on a boss before too but overall, your personal issues should not be permitted to affect your job performance and it's actually your boss' job to see that they don't. Hard to manage that if he's personally involved with you. I say keep work, work, and play elsewhere or work elsewhere.

[Vullkan]

First you need to decide what you want--romance or just a friend. If it is romance that is dangerious and have to endure much worst in terms of gossip--even if the boss can be fair about managing things, still others regardless will say that it is because he's sweet on you.

Better to find another place to work before going down that road. If you leave letting him know that you wouldn't mind him calling you from time to time after you leave--well the ball is in his court. If he bites and calls, alls well--but if not and he's not interested better that you findout now then be hurt latter.

[Jaded_Slut]

Thanks, guys. Perspective is everything...I just wish it was easier than this, but then nothing in life worth having is wouldn't be made better by making it a challenge.

Sad thing is...I would quit my job for him. Even worse...doing that wouldn't get me anywhere and it hurts...

[BigBear57]

JS, I'd really have to agree with the others.... just wanted to offer a bigbear hug to give you strength (((((((((((JS)))))))))))) Good Luck Hon.

[Jaded_Slut]

*smiles* Thanks, BigBear. I needed that.

[PantyFanatic]

I think we have more useful advise if you asked about where do you want to work next.:)

You don’t care for the job- Get out!
You’d like a relationship with the guy that’s your boss- Get out!

This was decided before you asked. ;)



And welcome to our group. :D

[denny]

I agree, you need to figure out where your next job will be and go there.