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Grumble
02-28-2004, 06:45 AM
Have you ever picked a time that was a real turning point in your life?

For me I think it was when Curvy Pm'ed me. The chain of events from that has restructured my life,

Anyone have a similar experience?

jseal
02-28-2004, 06:54 AM
Grumble,

Good one!

Yes sir, I have. I was sitting at a desk in the IT department at a bank (another phrase for nowhere) when I received a telephone call from someone I had met in college. When I commented how poor the connection was, he replied that he was calling from Saudi Arabia, and would I like to work over there.

That pulled me out of my rut!

BigBear57
02-28-2004, 07:49 AM
I think my most soul searching turnaround happened when I was 31. I remember well walking down the hall of that hospitol, nervous and hurried. I just happened to see the nursery window as I headed for the nurses station. There laying naked for all to see was one lone child, my first born. Light colored wisps of hair with a pink bow clasped to a brownish blonde curl she lay there quietly content looking out at the new world around her. I stood in front of that window awestricken by the moment. I could see my own reflection lightly in the glass partition between us and as I stood there it seemed my whole life passed through my mind. I wondered if I was ready to be the man she called Daddy. I made several decisions right there in that moment. I knew my priorities had changed. I wanted her to see a better man than I felt I had been up to that day.

Lilith
02-28-2004, 07:54 AM
I think the thing about turning points is that you can't actually tell you are experiencing one necessarily til a good deal of time has passed and you reflect on how that event changed your previous path. Otherwise what you see as a turning point may have been nothing more than a speedbump.:D

Catch22
02-28-2004, 08:30 AM
Every day is just another day to me.

Teddy Bear
02-28-2004, 08:33 AM
A speedbump or a detour. Time will tell.

(((BigBear))) That is beautiful! Have I told you lately how sexy you are? ;)


I either haven't had a major turning point in my life yet or if I did I just chalked it up to 'life'. Several life changing events have made me who I am: marriage, kids, 'stuff', but I wouldn't call them 'turning points'. I guess I've still got 'the big one' coming. :) :D

LixyChick
02-28-2004, 08:44 AM
I sat in a chair by her bed and held her hand, even though she didn't know I was there.....or did she? I could hear voices around me but I didn't pay much attention to the conversation. I leaned towards her ear and started the Lord's Prayer (she taught me it when I was 2), and I recited the whole thing without crying this time. I whispered, "I love you mommy" (we always called her mommy....no matter our age). I could hear her best friend, Doris, telling her it was ok....that she could let go and rest now. I didn't want to believe it, but in my deepest senses I knew it was happening. My older sister was saying something similar to what Doris had said, and I squeezed my mother's hand and leaned to her again and kissed her cheek and repeated, "I love you". Her chest rose in a heavy sigh and then lowered.......and never rose again. No matter what I logically knew.....I was stunned! There are no words to describe the overwhelming feeling that rushed through me. I continued to hold her hand and in an instant, my life, as far back as I could recollect, raced though my mind. My mother was in every part of those memories. No one is ever prepared to say goodbye to their mother. Now, my life would change forever.



This wasn't meant to bring anyone down, and if I have....I am so sorry for that! Yes.....it was one of the saddest moments in my life.......but since that day I have found out who "I" am as a woman. My mother helped me to become that woman. The day I lost her is the day I found out just how strong I am! She would always tell me that, but I never truly believed her till that day! I should have known it to be true.........Mom's are ALWAYS right! :heart:

P.S. BTW.....My mother would never allow anyone to say goodbye to her throughout our life, even if we were going on a long trip or if we were only just going to the store. She'd say that it sounded too final. So I never did say goodbye that day........I just said, "so-long, I'll see ya later".......and that would have made her smile!

Teddy Bear
02-28-2004, 08:55 AM
((((((Lixy)))))) TY for sharing that with us.

jennaflower
02-28-2004, 11:09 AM
Oh my...

First.. BigBear57... you are a fabulous man.. a father that both of your children will live their lives being proud of. I have no doubt that they are both aquitely aware of the unconditional love you have for them... as long as they know that.. they are promised a wonderful life... knowing that your parent loves you unconditionally makes all the difference. ((((BigBear57)))))

Secondly... Lixy... I want you to know... your above post.. made me cry... not out of sadness... but because I feel blessed to know you. Reading your post was like a premenition (sp) for me... for I have not lost either of my parents yet.. and it is one of my deepest dreads... that it will happen long before I am ready... because I don't believe I will ever be ready for such a loss.. (((Hugs)))) you are a remarkable woman... and if that is because of your mother... then we all owe her a debt of thanks..

My turning point...... goes back to when I was 18... sitting in my white volkwagon rabbit... listening to the boy I had dated since the 7th grade tell me that he loved me.. but that he had made a "mistake"... that he had slept with someone we both knew (caroline was her name.. still a name I can't bear hearing).. and that she was pregnant. I remember getting out of my car.. feeling as tho I was going to vomit.. and running.. down the block.. with him chasing me.. finally I stopped.. he caught me.. and I just cried as he held me. He told me then that her family didn't know and that he wasn't sure what was going to happen.. but that at 18 he felt he needed to do the right thing. All I could do was cry.. as he did. I finally walked back to my car.. and left... I drove around aimlessly for hours.. drove to the beach.. sat there for sometime.. just staring.. knowing that my life would never be the same...

The next day.. I went and visited my favorite teacher from highschool... as I sat in his livingroom telling him everything.. he looked at me knowing that I wouldn't survive unless I got out... and he suggested the military... I remember leaving his house.. driving directly to the recruiters office.. and in that moment I made my decision... and I enlisted.

Over the next 4 months as I was waiting to leave for basic... I continued to see Phillip... he proved to be my addiction... I continued to sleep with him (without protection) knowing that he was going to marry her... it was like a moth to a flame... I couldnt' stay away.. and there were moments that it got ugly. An example: At some point I found out that not only did her family not know of her pregnancy.. but also of her relationship with Phil.. one day after having passionate bittersweet sex with him during which he had left huge hickies on my neck... I drove to her house... her mother answered the door.. I asked for Caroline.. and as she came down the stairs... I looked at her mother and I said "Do you know that not only is your daughter a whore.. but she is pregnant" and I looked at Caroline and showed her the hickies and said "You best keep your dog on a leash".... and I left.... 18 years old... scorned.... and ugly..

As you can imagine... this period of my life was difficult.. I was 18... and leaving for the Navy... not because I was overly patriotic... but because I knew that not leaving would kill me..

yes.. that moment in the volkswagen changed my life forever... it broke me...


On a side note... Phillip entered my life yet again briefly almost 4 years ago... he and caroline had married.. and divorced... and he was "ending" his second marriage... and wanted to come "home" to me.. long story short... he slept with his 2nd wife again.. and she became pregnant... YEP... again... I lost him due to a pending birth. This time tho.. he didn't have the guts to tell me.. he just stopped calling...but I knew... and his mother verified it. Funny how I absolutely knew when he didn't call.

Recently (last week) I ran into his name at Classmates.com... he just became a new member... and I know that since I was the only friend he had from highschool.. he did it looking for me...

another turning point? perhaps..


Good god.. I know guys... tooo much information in this post.. LOL

osuche
02-28-2004, 11:13 AM
((((Lixy)))) I have had a similar experience, and I think you for reminding me that it wasn't all bad.

My biggest turning point as an adult has to be when I met my SO. I looked at him and realized that I was no longer living life for just myself anymore. It changed -- instantly -- the way I thought about myself and my future.

Ten years later, it's become more complex than this simple decision...and perhaps it must end...but this was definately the biggest turning point in my adult life.

PantyFanatic
02-28-2004, 11:53 AM
As stated above, it’s only in the review mirror that the long-term course change can be seen by me. With all the collisions of life’s trajectories, it seems that the ones that effected direction the most were the military service, loss of loved ones, birth of son & daughter and social class transitions.

The most meaningful events seem to contain radical awareness shifts or both extreme joy and pleasure as well as sorrow and terror.

BigBear57
02-28-2004, 02:23 PM
((((((((Teddybear))))))))))) Thanks so much ((((((((((((((Jenna flower))))))))))) If only I was worthy of such. Thank You. You're such a wonderful friend I don't know why the guys aren't standing in line waiting for you.
((((((((((((((((((Lixy))))))))))))))) I think losing a parent is one of those things we learn to work around but feel the void from then on. Thanks for sharing such a poignant memory. Your Mom has to be proud of the delightful person you've become. I know we all love you.
((((((((((((Osuche))))))))))) Hell just 'cause you're you.

Mae
02-28-2004, 10:57 PM
When I walked away from an accident that totalled my car and, normally, would have decapitated the driver, (me). I only had some glass in my thigh. Made me appreciate life, more.

Oldfart
02-29-2004, 04:06 AM
Watching my first child turn from blue-grey to pink was the

biggest turning point for me.

Others just haven't measured up, except my cuddle from Lilith.

Loulabelle
02-29-2004, 04:33 AM
When I PMed FussyPucker was definitely a turning point for me.

Neither of us could ever have guessed what was to follow. :D

Grumble
02-29-2004, 05:20 AM
I have had several momentous events that shape me really

when I was raped at 16 it sent me inside myself for years I never was given any counselling

when I came to in hospital after attempting suicide and got the help I so badly needed.

the birth of my children for sure

the decision to leave my barren marriage


and the latest My relationship with curvy, I doubt it will be a speedhump in the road of life but time will tell

LixyChick
03-01-2004, 05:53 AM
(((((((((Everyone))))))))))

Geezzzzzzz! I love you guys!

((((((Jenna))))))) I have to direct this to you because after I posted my story I had to get offline.....but I almost ALWAYS have another idea to add and I usually edit my stuff about 4 times before I am satisfied. I couldn't edit my contribution and I'm glad, now, that I couldn't since reading your story. I don't think you would have told us the whole story if I had of fixed mine to read how I wanted it to.

Ya see........what I'm trying to say is...........my mother's name was Caroline (and my younger sister's is as well)....and after I shut down my puter, I was going over in my head what I had posted and I got to thinking that I should have told you all that. But, there are reasons for everything and I think that had I said that here, you might never have posted your reply as you did. And, I can understand why the name "Caroline" is so heart wrenching for you.....but I hope that now that you know my mother's name, you might be able to hear it and not have such a negative reaction.

Ironic, huh?

jennaflower
03-01-2004, 07:54 AM
((((Lixy))))) thank you... and you are right, I probably would have left that out had I known... very ironic... how just a word.. or a name brings up so very different emotion...