The Pixies Herald

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/7/04 (Australian time)


10,000 killed in rush to watch Lilith's nipples defrost!


Britney Spears to wed Steve Erwin. She is reported to have said she likes a guy in shorts who is wild!


The Pixies Herald is updated daily.

[Ryan²]

It's a day ahead of us - today is the 6th!

[PantyFanatic]

Frontpage 1/7/04 (Australian time)

[Eliza]

:D LMFAO @ PF.

Cute idea Catch22...I'll make sure to peek at the paper to get the lastest news. :D

[MilkToast]

Originally posted by Eliza
:D LMFAO @ PF.

Cute idea Catch22...I'll make sure to peek at the paper to get the lastest news. :D

Tues 06-Jan-2004 22:27 EST


(PP) Pixies participant Eliza caught peeping in on threads, other Pixies residents shocked. "She was such a nice poster," commented one.


PP = Pixies Press: where your press pass gets you more than news!

[Catch22]

Update 1/7/04 (Australian time)


Test results revealed.

Researchers revealed today the findings of the purity test show that the average Pixie should not be: Left alone in a room with your Granny, a bowl of fruit, fluffy cat or the little boy from down the lane.


Airlines to issue plastic bags.

Airlines will now issue boarding passengers with plastic bags to pee in on long flights. Thus stopping passengers from standing in lines waiting for the bathroom. Wall St reports a rise in plastic manufacture stocks.

[BIBI]

10:16 am Ontario time LOL

Due to the extreme drop in temperature it has been noted that the coffee is perking along with all the ladies' nipples!

[BIBI]

BREAKING NEWS

BIBI's clock is screwed on her computer and runs as slow as she does!

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/8/04 (Australian time)



The next series of survivor is to be filmed on Middle Earth. Orcs rejoice!

[Catch22]

Breaking News 1/9/04 (Australian time)




Mrs.Fussy and Britney Spears
Pictures to follow!


Police raid IAKaraokeGirls' party.

[Sugarsprinkles]

EXTRA!!! EXTRA!!!! READ ALL ABOUT IT!!!"



LixyChick and FussyPucker wed in ceremony so secret even they didn't know about it.

Mrs Fussy to request annulment immediately!!!


Pictures to follow :D:D:D

[LixyChick]

*hides from paparazzo*

[Aqua]

Special Bulletin 14:04 EST USA

PIXIES' MODERATRIX STILL AT LARGE

As of 2:04pm EST, Pixies-place foremost Mod is nowhere to be seen. Rumors of her last known whereabouts being an airport are still unsubstantiated at this time. An anonymous source claims to have overheard the 'Darling of Domme Depot' commentating on a desire to play in the snow right after hearing reports of a recent snowstorm in the Seattle area.

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/10/04 (Australian time)



Pixie Eating Plants.
Readers are warned that plants grown from seeds sent to you by fellow Pixies may be an alien lifeform that will in the dead of night replace you with a copy made from the seed pods of the plant.

[Catch22]

I don't want to marry Justin: Diaz


They may be one of Hollywood's hottest couples but Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake have no plans to tie the knot, the actress said.

Settling down and starting a family is far from the mind of Charlie's Angels star Diaz and her pop star toy boy.

"The truth is that if I wanted to be married with children right now, I would be married with children right now," Diaz told the February edition of W Magazine.

"Everybody thinks that just because they might be searching for a person to spend the rest of their life with, I am.

"Why is it that with every actress in a relationship, it's like, 'Oh, well, you're with that person because you want to get married and have a baby?"'

Diaz, 31, also hit back at those who sniggered at her relationship with 6ft 2in Timberlake, nine years her junior.

"It's not like this is the first time in the history of human relationships that people were drawn to one another because of who they are, not what age they are," she said.

Timberlake, a former member of boyband NSYNC, shot to fame during his high profile relationship with Britney Spears.

He fuelled speculation in a recent interview that he and Diaz were considering marriage.

He said: "Cameron and I are at a special point in our relationship.

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/13/04 (Australian time)

New contraceptive massage oil.

A new contraceptive massage oil is being tested. It is called HiPong. Rub it all over your body and no worries. Nobody will want to go near you for days.

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/17/04 (Australian time)

Wacko Jacko to get movie role.
Wacko Jacko to get role in remake of Planet of the apes. He will be playing an ape!

[OzKristin]

haha ur great, so funny

[Scarecrow]

EXTRA EXTRA

Apes reject Wacko Jacko
After he was caught in the nursery tree

:jedi:

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/20/04 (Australian time)



Pennsylvania rocked by strange cult.
Maids reported rolling naked in the snow at midnight amongst the cow pads!

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/21/04 (Australian time)


Wacko Jacko sneezes
Nose later found in South Dakota!

[Catch22]

Frontpage 1/22/04 (Australian time)


Loud thud heard from Canada.
A loud thud was heard coming from Canada this morning. It appears to have been caused by Canadians all freezing their butts off at once!

[Catch22]

Churchill's parrot still hates Hitler


AFP - The inner thoughts of Britain's wartime leader Winston Churchill live on, thanks to the foul mouth of his 104-year-old parrot who lives at a garden centre in southeast England.

"F*** Hitler! F*** the Nazis!" says Charlie, a female blue and gold macaw which Churchill bought in 1937, two years before the outbreak of World War II in Europe.

"Parrots are remarkably adept at mimicking sounds and voices," says an article about Charlie in the February issue of Jack, a British men's magazine, which hits the newsstands on Thursday.

"So when Charlie gives her opinion of the National Socialist German Workers' Party, it is rendered with a Churchillian inflection," it said.

Following Churchill's death in 1965, Charlie was sold to pet shop owner Peter Oram, who keeps her at the garden centre in Reigate, Surrey, where she wanders around the grounds in summer but stays indoors in the winter.

"She is a very old parrot," Sylvia Martin, who works with Oram, told Jack.

"She has become increasingly quarrelsome -- and, if the truth be told, is now looking a little scruffy."

[BIBI]

Nope..not me!

I just lost it now.......laughing!!! :)

[Catch22]

Frontpage news. 7/18/2004 (Australian time)




Picture of shocked onlookers.

[BIBI]

nyuk..nyuk...nyuk :)