Has sex or masturbation ever gone wrong for you?

[Ryan²]

I'm just curious to know, has sex or masturbation ever gone wrong for anyone here? I've read some pretty weird stories on the web, one where a guy once jerked off with a lightbulb wedged up his ass, and the lightbulb smashed in his ass, leaving him to struggle to get bits of glass out.

LOL.

[cowgirltease]

I'm not that damn stupid!!!!!:rolleyes: LOL

[Ryan²]

*Panics*

Neither am I, neither am I. AHH!

Just wanted to make that clear. :)

[Lilith]

I once ended up in the hospital after sex. It was sooooooooo embarrassing:o To make matters worse it was a millitary hospital.

Ladies you know how when you orgasm you get those delicious spasms...what if you tightened and did not let go, at all, for hours. OUCH!!!!!!! They shot me up with some muscle relaxant and I was much better. That was like 15 years ago and hasn't *knock on wood* happened again:o

[Ryan²]

LOL, by "knock on wood" you mean the UK's saying, "touchwood", right Lilith?

[Lilith]

must be but in the US if you are "touching wood" it means something entirely different;)

[LixyChick]

What was the question.....and who's wood are we touching? LOL!

Never had anything go awry in either category....*knock on wood*!

[cowgirltease]

Originally posted by Lilith
I once ended up in the hospital after sex. It was sooooooooo embarrassing:o To make matters worse it was a millitary hospital.

Ladies you know how when you orgasm you get those delicious spasms...what if you tightened and did not let go, at all, for hours. OUCH!!!!!!! They shot me up with some muscle relaxant and I was much better. That was like 15 years ago and hasn't *knock on wood* happened again:o

Damn I hope you married that guy!!!!!!! Never found one that could do that to me!!!!! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!

[Ryan²]

LOL. Perhaps he was something to do with the military, if she ended up in a military hospital.

On a serious note Lilith, why was it a military hospital?

[Lilith]

It was Mr. Lil and he was in the millitary which means by default so was I.

[IAKaraokeGirl]

I almost ended up in the emergency room on my honeymoon. Mr. IAKG and I were playing with strawberries...and the first one got stuck. He couldn't get it out. :rolleyes:

[jennaflower]

ROFL... I can just see you explaining to the doctor what occurred.. and begging him to make it stop.. LOL

IAKG... another example as to why I have never been brave enough to allow small forgein objects within...

[Ryan²]

Originally posted by IAKaraokeGirl
I almost ended up in the emergency room on my honeymoon. Mr. IAKG and I were playing with strawberries...and the first one got stuck. He couldn't get it out. :rolleyes: I take it you did get it out then, if you say you "nearly" ended up in the emergency room?

[IAKaraokeGirl]

LOL. Jenna, it wasn't *that* small--a rather large strawberry, in fact. And yes, it *did* come out--after I practiced some childbirthing skills I never needed after that. :D

[Sharni]

Sex went wrong for me and Bilbo in our younger days

Lets just say the angle of the dangle wasn't quite right.....He slameed into my pelvic bone and split the foreskin....

Most embarrassing part for me was he told the Doctor (whom i seen daily at work) that i bit him :o:o:o....

[GirlwithV]

Originally posted by ukG²
I'm just curious to know, has sex or masturbation ever gone wrong for anyone here? I've read some pretty weird stories on the web, one where a guy once jerked off with a lightbulb wedged up his ass, and the lightbulb smashed in his ass, leaving him to struggle to get bits of glass out.

LOL.

:( Um.... Ouch!

[SuccubusKitty]

Worst that ever happened to me was like Sharni, but not so severe. Mr. Kitty just ended up with some bruising and soreness for a few days after the pelvic slam....I was a little sore too, but not near like him.

[hornyblonde]

one time i was having sex with a woman who was a little larger than me and she was doing me doggystyle over the sink. when she reached round to grab my breasts she slipped and knocked the kettle on me. the almost boiling hot water splashed all over my pussy and thighs and i ran up to the bathroom to have a cold shower. it stung like hell and, after suffering a red mark where the water had been, i had to wait, without sex, for 3 weeks for it to go away. that was about 2 years ago, and my words of warning are as follows:

Never have sex next to a hot kettle.

*Sophie*

[Ryan²]

Or alternatively, make sure the kettle hasn't just this minute boiled.

[SuzyQ]

Originally posted by hornyblonde
one time i was having sex with a woman who was a little larger than me and she was doing me doggystyle over the sink. when she reached round to grab my breasts she slipped and knocked the kettle on me. the almost boiling hot water splashed all over my pussy and thighs and i ran up to the bathroom to have a cold shower. it stung like hell and, after suffering a red mark where the water had been, i had to wait, without sex, for 3 weeks for it to go away. that was about 2 years ago, and my words of warning are as follows:

Never have sex next to a hot kettle.

*Sophie*

Is why I always insist on the bedroom :rolleyes:

[BlueSwede]

A co-worker of mine (another nurse) had a male patient with a raging urinary tract infection, but that was the least of his problems. An x-ray of his pelvic region showed he had a pencil floating around in his bladder.

[Lilith]

ouch!

[Ryan²]

Originally posted by BlueSwede
A co-worker of mine (another nurse) had a male patient with a raging urinary tract infection, but that was the least of his problems. An x-ray of his pelvic region showed he had a pencil floating around in his bladder. How the fucking hell did he manage to get it there?

[nikki1979]

omg dont ask , i dotn wanna know!!!!!
or wel ive a good idea and just dont want to be proven right!
~nikki~

[SuccubusKitty]

thank god pencils aren't made of lead anymore...or he would have been poisoned too

[BlueSwede]

I'm sure it wasn't that difficult to get the pencil there. I know of someone who was a member of a different forum who was into BDSM big time. He stretched his urethra to a rather large size by putting larger and larger diameter metal rods made for that purpose into it. He once posted a pix of his collection of different size rods; some were the size of pencils.

[Catch22]

Originally posted by cowgirltease
Damn I hope you married that guy!!!!!!! Never found one that could do that to me!!!!! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!

Go west young woman!