xxx~ I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus ~xxx

[Lilith]

I absolutely love this song! It's by Standstill and in it Daddy and Santa start getting it on and then Mommy gets in on it and has herself a very merry Christmas:D It's very funny but I can't find the lyrics online anywhere.


What are some of your favorite irreverant holiday songs????

[WildIrish]

I heard Porky Pig singing Blue Christmas the other day and have been singing it ever since.

Anything off Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo's Christmas Album will also do.

[Lilith]

I swear to you I was mid sex last night and the "Swiss Colony Beef Log" song came on the radio:D I laughed so hard!

[WildIrish]

How on earth do you go back to screwing after hearing that?

I might've called it a night. ha ha

"Swiss Colony Beef Log baby!!! That's what Christmas is all about!"

[Lilith]

Not if I was on top..you wouldn't have;)

[WildIrish]

Originally posted by Lilith
Not if I was on top..you wouldn't have;)


Good point.

Touche`

[Steph]

Here's the lyrics, sicko :D



i saw daddy kissing santa claus lyrics by adotta kip



From the album yellow magic orchestra

I SAW DADDY KISSING SANTA CLAUS - Kip Addotta
I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night.
He didn't see me creep
Down the stairs to have a peep.
He thought that I was upstairs in my bedroom fast asleep.
Then I saw Daddy tickle Santa Claus
Underneath his beard so snowy white.
There must be some mistake;
Was I really awake?
I rubbed my eyes and moved in close, a better look to take.
Then I saw Daddy hugging Santa Claus.
He took his hand and pulled him to the couch.
It must have been just fine;
Santa didn't mean to mind.
Then Daddy moved across the room to pour them both some wine.
Then I saw Daddy fondle Santa Claus,
And on his ear he nibbled now and then.
I crawled across the floor,
I hid behind the door,
I left it open just a crack so I could see some more.
Then I saw Daddy undress Santa Claus.
They quickly threw their clothes on our big chair.
Well, much to my surprise,
I couldn't believe my eyes!
It wasn't Santa after all but Mommy in disguise,
When I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus
Underneath to mistletoe last night.
Oh what I laugh it would have been,
If I had REALLY seen,
Daddy kissing Santa Claus last night!!!

[Steph]

I'm not sure if that's the one you're talking about because it's not a threeway :D

[PantyFanatic]

Originally posted by Steph
I'm not sure if that's the one you're talking about because it's not a threeway :D
Then is can't be the one running through Lilith's head.;)

[dreamgurl]

Grandma got run over by a reindeeer i don't know why but it has been forever:deer:

[Lilith]

Nope Steph but that is a cute one. Mine is much naughtier:D

[Aqua]

Originally posted by Steph

i saw daddy kissing santa claus lyrics by kip addotta
Kip!

Anyone here ever heard the song "Wet Dream" by Kip Addotta? Not a Christmas song but it goes like this...

It was April the forty-first
Being a quadruple leap year
I was driving in downtown Atlantis
My barracuda was in the shop
So I was in a rented stingray
And it was overheating

So I pulled into a Shell Station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"

While they were doing that
I walked over to a place called the Oyster Bar, a real dive
But I knew the owner
He used to play for the Dolphins
I said "Hi Gil"
You have to yell, he's hard of herring

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Gil was also down on his luck
Fact is he was barely keeping his head below water
I bellied up to the sandbar
He poured me the usual

Rusty snail, hold the grunion
Shaken not stirred
With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side
Heavy on the mako

I slipped him a fin
On porpoise
I was feeling good
I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids
For the halibut

Well the place was crowded
We were packed in like sardines They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal
What sole

Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna
Salmon Chanted Evening
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers
Probably there to see the bass player

One of them was this cute little yellowtail
And she's giving me the eye
So I figured this is my chance for a little fun
You know, piece of Pisces

But she said things I just couldn't fathom
She was too deep, seemed to be under a lot of pressure
Boy, could she drink
She drank like a . . .
She drank a lot

I said "What's your sign"
She said "Aquarium"
I said "Great, let's get tanked"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

I invited her to my place for a midnight bait
I said "Come on baby, it'll only take a few minnows"
She threw me that same old line
"Not tonight, I gotta haddock"

And she wasn't kidding either
Cause in came the biggest, meanest looking haddock
I'd ever seen come down the pike
He was covered with mussels

He came over to me and said
"Listen, shrimp, don't you come trollin' around here"
What a crab
This guy was steamed
I could see the anchor in his eyes

I turned to him, I said
"A-balone, you're just being shellfish"
Well, I knew it was going to be trouble and so did Gil
‘Cause he was already on the phone to the cods

The haddock hits me with a sucker punch
I catch him with a left hook
He eels over
It was a fluke but there he was
Lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel
Kelpless

I said "Forget the cods Gil
This guy's gonna need a sturgeon"
Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend
She came over to me, she said
"Hey, big boy, you're really a game fish
What's your name"
I said "Marlin"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Well, from then on we had a whale of a time
I took her to dinner, I took her to dance
I bought her a bouquet of flounders
And then I went home with her
And what did I get for my trouble
A case of the clams

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

[Ryan²]

Originally posted by WildIrish
I heard Porky Pig singing Blue Christmas the other day and have been singing it ever since.

Anything off Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo's Christmas Album will also do.

That reminds me. Anyone remember Chocolate Salty Balls by Chef? I can't remember if it was Christmas related, but boy what a song!

[Steph]

Originally posted by ukG²
Anyone remember Chocolate Salty Balls by Chef?

Wasn't "Salty Balls" a SNL skit with Alec Baldwin?

[Euphemism]

WildIrish - I wager you listen to RadioParadise? I'm there too, if so, also as Euphemism.

As for "Wet Dream". Love that song, have it on mp3.

[Teddy Bear]

Originally posted by Steph
Wasn't "Salty Balls" a SNL skit with Alec Baldwin?



I think it was 'sweaty balls'.

[LixyChick]

Originally posted by Teddy Bear
I think it was 'sweaty balls'. Gawd! I hate to be a stickler........but that was "Schweaty".........and Alec Baldwin played _________(someone help me here...his first name in the skit????) Schweaty.....of the Schweaty Balls Company......who made........aromatic, firm, lickable, moist, tender(etc., etc.).......Schweaty balls!!!!!!!!!

[LixyChick]

And......Geezzzzzzzzzz.........I am dating myself here........but........

Didn't Kip Adotta get his fame from the show "Make Me Laugh"????

If he didn't start there.....he was definitely on it......it's a name you can't forget......and I haven't heard/read it since those days!!!!!!!!

[Fairy-Bird]

My favorite holiday song is "The Twelve PAINS of Christmas"

Starts out:

"THe first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me.... IS finding a Christmas Tree..."
It goes on to 11 other pains... like stringing up the lights, sending christmas cards, FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS, and the rest omg I have to find the lyrics now!!! hehe