I want to throttle my kid...UGH!!!!

[BlueSwede]

UGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!:eek: :mad: :confused:

Please just tell me I am not the only one who has wanted to kill their kid--not literally but you've wanted to string 'em up and tan the hide off them!

I have always been very close to my daughter, and I have read that often the closer you are to a child when that child is growing up, the rougher the waters when it comes time for the 2 of you to part ways as he or she becomes more and more independent and finally out on his or her own. I guess that is what is happening here.

I am so angry that I am crying...I am just seething. I wonder, "Who in the hell is this person standing in front of me?! Who is this spoiled brat with no morals?! It sure isn't the kid I knew and raised for 18 yrs!" I feel so helpless and lost!:eek: :mygod: :(

[PantyFanatic]

I think it's called Parenthood. It comes with the birth certificate.


And the birth certificate is the only permanent thing you get with a kid. Everything else will keep changing.:rolleyes:

[Lilith]

Maybe they should make up some exchange program...I will trade you your "Who in the hell is this person standing in front of me?! Who is this spoiled brat with no morals?! It sure isn't the kid I knew and raised for 18 yrs!" for my "I can not believe he is so damn smart and does absofuckinglutely nothing with it! Gonna get booted out of smartypants school, 12 years old!"


Remember some day she will have her own kids....Mother's Revenge!

[Irish]

BlueSwede---I know it is difficult,because I didn't do it myself.Try to put yourself in their shoes,when you were the kid,dealing with your parents.It's really hard when they are growing up&you know
what kind of people are out there and they think you are exaggerating!I didn't realise,until I saw my kids with their own kids,that,my wife&I did a pretty good job.You want to kill them at the time,but cheer up!In a few years,it will be your grandchildren,
whose asses that you want to kick! Irish

[dicksbro]

I always felt like I wouldn't sell any of our kids for a million dollars ...



but there were days I would have given them away for free.



I think we all face times like that. You've got my sympathy, BlueSwede. Most of them eventually come around. Four of our seven have ... two are still dependents ... and one ... well ... we keep hoping. :)

[PantyFanatic]

LMAO



Funny how this thread sat around orphan for almost an hour……… then 4 replies in 23 minutes.:D

[BlueSwede]

Thanks, everybody, I really needed some feedback to help me calm down. I'm usually very easy going and have, even my daughter says, LOTS of patience. But I know my blood pressure must be sky high at the moment.

And, sadly, Lilith, I've got one of those others you described, too! (The "I cannot believe he is so damn smart and does absofuckinglutely nothing with it!") Do you think I can get anybody to do a 2-for-1 trade?!

And now she's in a great mood and all smiles like nothing happened. Meanwhile, I'm still pretty shakey.

Irish, at least the grandchildren you can send back home to Mommy and Daddy once you've had a visit with them! :D

[Scarecrow]

BlueSwede grandchildern are a parents payback. Grandma and Grandpa can spoil the hell out of them and then send them homes. Oh how sweet it is. So just wait your turn LMAO

[jennaflower]

BlueSwede.. I had one of those nights just last week... but for everyone of those.. he gives me 50 others that make me realize how blessed I am (but then again, he is still young @ 8 ) LOL

[Sharni]

When my kids have kids....i'm gonna spoil em rotten...feed em up on red cordial...red icypoles...tons of sugar...and when they are really climbing the walls i'm gonna send em home *Evil grin*

Oh and i'm gonna go round to their house and jump on their furniture :D

[BlueSwede]

Sharniqua <-----------:D LOL


Thanks, everybody. It's so hard when they're going through the "terrible two's" but multiplied times 10 because they're teens...young people who think they are as grown up as their parents but still sleep with a stuffed animal.

[ericthered]

Don't worry too much, BlueSwede. Firstly for the very good reason that nothing you do now is going to make much difference, but secondly because in a year or two she'll start to turn into a human being again, and you may even like her. If you're lucky.....

[Irish]

With age comes"I wish that I had"I remember when my
parents,would get called in to see the teacher(many times).
I always got "pissed off"when the teachers,would tell my
parents,that I was working"Way below my potential"That I
did just enough to get by!They were right.I now wish that
I had applied myself more,but at the time,I didn't think that
it was"Cool"They also said that I,"Resented Authority!"Right
again! Irish
P.S.I respect authority,when it is in the proper place.It usually
isn't!

[Bardog]

Sharniqua I feel the same way! My mother used to tell me she hoped I had kids just like I was as a kid. I did. She thought it was funny then.

I just hope that some day I'm half as smart as my 11 year old is...:rolleyes:

[huntersgirl]

Originally posted by Bardog

I just hope that some day I'm half as smart as my 11 year old is...:rolleyes:


ROFL!!!! Me too!!! I thought it wasn't until the teen years that they thought they knew everything. My almost 11 year old son knows it all! He is also one of those..."I cannot believe he is so damn smart and does absofuckinglutely nothing with it." I've been doubly blessed...lol!

[Oldfart]

Two of my little darlings ran away from home.

They eventually came home again as adults.

[BigBear57]

Swede Hon, I grew up with 5 brothers, Yep Mom had 6 of us in just under 7 years. It's a wonder Mom has any hair left. Any way reading your post I couldn't help but think of my Dad. He always had a way of making us realise our short comings and not really losing his cool. He'd say, son you're gonna scrape your ass and then sit back and watch for it. Then he'd dust us off, all the while reminding us he'd given us hints. Now I know with girls it's a bit different but try to let her know you were young once and you can save her a lot of scrapes and make things easier if she'll only listen. Even then youth has a way of allowing her to think she knows better. All you can really do is let her know you'll be there to defend her if she's right and save her but remind her of her wrongs if she's not. My own daughter is soon to be 15 so my rollercoaster is just beginning. I try to mix little lessons in our banter. Use laughter to cover concerns when I can. Mostly I just pray she'll have half as good an example as I did. Huggggs Hon, hang in there, they're worth every tear and scream. (Of course you know that, you just needed to vent some)

[Irish]

OF---One of mine did!After searching every teenage hangout.all night,ready to "Kick Ass"on anyone bothering my"Little Darling.",
I came home,to find her,in bed asleep.She had gone,with her girlfriend,to a teenage dance establishment,that I had forbid her
to go to,figuring that she knew all of the Bikers,and they would
protect her!She,probably,saved someone from,hospitalisation,
by coming home! Irish

[Grumble]

I have a 14 year old 'darling daughter'

She knows how to rile me beyond reason with her selfish and know it all attitude. I hope she has a daughter just like her.

What goes around comes around LOL.

[Irish]

The daughter,that I was referring to,was 15 then.She is 34
now& has 2 sons.One is autistic.You couldn't find a more,
caring ,loving mother. Irish

[Steph]

This throttling thread is wonderful! I spent much of the week with my cousin . . . his little two-and-a-half year old is going through the terrible twos. He threw food from every meal on the floor, screamed on the bus, ran away at the zoo and cried if he didn't get what he wanted. Our patience ran thin but then he'd say something incredibly cute and all was well again :)

[jseal]

BlueSwede,

It IS weird, isn’t it? I have a 17 and a 15 year old. It can be very, very difficult at times. But as the others have said, don’t get mad, get even. Let her live – then spoil her children and return them!

I read this recently, it might help:

POSITION: Mother, Mom, Mama

JOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES: For the rest of your life you must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite your tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat just in case the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final and complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION: Get this...You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS: While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.

[BlueSwede]

jseal, I've read that before, too. It sure is the truth, isn't it?! :D

[Devillishgirl]

Y'all are scaring me.....my oldest is 3...you mean it gets worse?? :eek:

[celticangel]

often thought it would make sence for theme parks, shopping malls etc etc to have a tape recording of " don't touch, stop that, behave, thats enough!, wait til I get u homeetc etc" in English, French and German (or whatever) and play it on a loop!!!!! Kids ~~~~~~~~~~little monsters the world over, but wouldn't change mine for anything!

[WildIrish]

My out of touch parents bought my 10 year old son a game for the x-box that is rated "M". This from the people that bitched about buying Pong!

We forbid him to play it, but that little shit woke up early and rushed right out to enjoy it before we got up.

I think he will be out on parental probation in 2006.

[Cheyanne]

Recent Headlines

"School is Out For Summer"

Article on last page buried in advertisments..........

"Mom Held Hostage by 9, 15, and 16 year olds~ Week 3.."

And this is all that I have to say about this..........

[Lilith]

There is a GOD!!!! My brainiac maniac finally made the grades!!!! Hot damn.....evil bitch mom can retire. For now:p


I am nearing the end of week 2............








seems more like 6 :spin::dizzy::spin:

[Irish]

Devillishgirl---Tho your oldest is only 3,don't give up!I know
that when they're this age,it is hard to picture.Someday,when
your kid,has kids,you will look at the way that your kid,treats
theirs and realise that you did SOMETHING right! Irish

[Pussy Willow]

I also have a 12 yr. old son as well. We're trying to get him into a "smartypants" school. He wants to apply to the 3 top science
high schools but his 7th grade grades suck.

It's a good thing these schools pretty much only look at their own
tests and don't put as much importance on 7th grade grades.

This kid scored 4's on both citywide reading and math tests, (4 is the best you can get), but can't seem to get above a 75 in math on his report card.

We bought the review two review books, I told him I'd help him study.

We have a VERY LONG summer ahead of us !!!!!!

So take heart, blueSwede, you are not alone, I think it comes with the territory.

We can see where they are headed, because we've either been down that same road or chose a better road for ourselves.

But we can do it for them.................................

Sometimes they have to find out the hard way.

I hope Matthew will let me help him. He's certainly got the brains
to pass those tests, now let's see if he's got the brains to let me help him study !!!!!

[Tralis]

Kids go in cycles.
0-2: Dependant. very little free will. Cute, and absoultly unaware.
2-3: They now know that they are a seperate creature, and combined with the weapon of speech, will resist you until truly scared.
4-6: This is when morals actualy come in. They keep on doing stupid stuff, but they'll learn common sense with some work.
7-10: Golden age. They love you, your all powerful. With continued effort you've reached a stable age.
11-13[12 for some]: They want more responsibility. They move more with their freinds. All your hard work is starting to come down as the grow. They'll start to resist the "unfair", so less nessary rules will be battled upon and generally removed.
14[13 for some]-17: They want to run their lives as much as possible, and want to love you, but they also want do do their own thing as much as possible. They might seem like they hate you, but they just dont want be unprepared to be themselves.
18-21: Will try to avoid contact at all costs.
22-on: Wish they spent more time with you, blah, blah, blah.

[Teddy Bear]

When your kids are acting terrible you think your the only one in the world with such horrible children and you wonder where did you go wrong......
But then a thread like this lets you know your not alone and everythings gonna work out in the end.

Thanks guys!!!

My daughters are basically wonderful, terrific, super, great people. But just had a go round with the 16 yr old this afternoon. grrrrrrrrrrrrr kids!!!!

When my 2 were young and acting up like little kids do, my then single, childless brother, watched my frustration with them and then said, "You did this on purpose?" Hah, now he's got 2 that act just like mine did. I haven't said it to him yet,,,,,, waiting for the right moment.

Teddy ;) :) :D

[denny]

I am remarried and now I'm reliving my first incarnation, god help me. May I find the strength!

[txgrneyes]

OK Guys...I myself am going through all of the above. My 8 yr old daughter and I are already fighting about everything...and my 5 yr old son is just a loveable little lier. Now I read that it is only going to get worse. Oh dear lord...please help me.

Seems like I can give advise with the best of them but I can not communicate with my children...We talk all the time but I dont beleive I ever get through until I spank them or send them to there rooms so I can "calm down"...so how can it get worse....?

I know there is a light at the end of the tunnell but I want to know just how long this tunnel is?

[denny]

Lets see, Tex. 18 minus 5 equals 13 long years. I have one with a tendency to lie. Very competitive you know. Don't let it pass, ever!
Best of luck.

[LixyChick]

I don't have children Blue.........and yet I can see the forrest better at times than my sister's can (they can't see the forrest for the trees) ........so they often come to me for tidbits of advice.

It's so hard to watch them at times like you describe. They think it's "all their fault" that the kids are acting like shit heads! In all actuality........it happens to each and every one of us as we are growing up. Some in worse ways than others......but rebellion is the worst part of raising a child. Kids think they know EVERYTHING....and adults are just nuisances put here to drive them crazy. It doesn't matter how angelic they were when they were younger......and you thought they could never be like so-and-so's daughter/son.........because sooner or later (approx. around the age of 13, give or take a few) they become aware of the insider fact that they are all knowing. They don't need adult supervision or advice or our wisdom of "when I was your age" (you've seen the eyes roll on that one)....because they are NOT us! We have NO IDEA how they feel and how they should handle a difficult situation, because no matter the fact that we've experienced the exact same instance..........we are too old to know how they could be feeling or how it will all work out if they followed our advice instead of making similar mistakes that we have already learned from. It's their mistakes and by all that they stand for, they are gonna make um if they want to!

DUH!!!!!! But no matter how you try......seems the harder you try.....the more resistance you are going to get. Best way I've seen to handle this fact.......reverse psycology. It's hardest on the parent........but it sometimes brings about a faster, more positive result than banging heads and demanding your way be best. Let them make the mistakes you know won't permenantly harm them! As a matter of fact......make them make the mistakes that will cause very little trouble for you! Give them your blessing to spend their last dollar on what seems to be the junkiest "have to have" object you've ever seen. Tell them you'd never buy it but then that's just you and that they might know better in this instance.......then sit back and watch as it all becomes clear that they've made a major mistake (in their eyes). ! If they don't have a job and no money.....flaunt yours! Show them things your saving to buy......things you know they'd like but could never afford.......and go buy something you know they'd die to have themselves. Never let them use it but let them see it often! Make sure they know how hard you worked for the item.....but that the work was part of the reward of being able to afford such a luxury.

Harmful things are a different story and you'll still have to bang heads on them.........but for the things that aren't a danger........try and let go and let them make the mistakes you know will surely follow. Believe it or not.....they do grow out of it eventually.........and some even come to their parents later in years and say how wonderful the parent was and how stupid they had been not to listen in the first place.

My baby sister's youngest son is 13+ now and she swears he was kidnapped by aliens and replaced with this demonic kid! On the other hand......her oldest son is 22+ now and has done such a turn-around she can hardly believe he's hers and that they made it through it all! He was so bad we thought he would be in prison at this time in his life. Instead......he's actually come to her and cried and apologized for hurting her all those years. He has a son of his own now and he's scared his son might be just like he was....in time. Little does he know what he's in for!

Just know this Blue..........you are by no means alone on this subject....and it's not all your fault! In the end.....you'll look back at the suffering part and hardly believe it happened.......because in the end.......your child will be an adult.....and he'll/she'll be OK!

My thoughts and best wishes to you...that this will not go on for too much longer!

[Cheyanne]

Well said Lixy.... well said. :D

[PantyFanatic]

Do you know about the flag story?

I stopped at my daughters today and was being told about how early her little one was up this morning and made her start her day 2 hours early. I reminded her of the four year old that I found sitting in the family room at about 04:55 one morning eating cereal out of the box and starring at the white hissing light of the TV screen like the kid in Poltergeist.

Through squinted eyes I asked “what are you doing down here?”. “I want to watch the flag story” was her reply, and while I was asking what the hell she was talking about, the local station came on and started broadcasting with the National Anthem.

Did you know that they start the day the same way they end it? I sure didn’t! I’ve watched it go off many time, but never was there for the morning start two hours later. I could only sit there with my head in my hands and think she’s seen the “flag story” before.:eek:



(true story)

[Cheyanne]

What a precious memory you have PF...

I am sure that at the time it wasn't so, but to look back at it and smile now... :)

[PantyFanatic]

(This was intended to be a post to another thread relating to our opinions about our children.
http://www.pixies-place.com:81/forums/showthread.php?threadid=15392)
After suffering through setting this to paper [paper = codger talk for electronic word document] I felt this enduring thread more appropriate. I will, from time to time, attempt to muster the strength to relate the two additional migration of son and the one, but GRAND, exodus of the daughter.)

Parents should NOT convert their kids rooms. Parents should get the house keys when they leave. Parents should not visit uninvited for at least 3 months. College tuition should only be paid from place of residence.

About six months after my son, daughter and I were living together alone, son moves in with a buddy. He needs a few pots and pans from an “unused” gourmet kitchen. Of course a few towels, some bed linen, a chair from the family room etc.

Three weeks later his buddy moves out and his new airline stewardess girlfriend has moved in.

Four months later he moves back home after 2 other buddies take over the 1 year lease. He has his bed & dresser, some clothes in one shopping bag and a leather garter belt and $375 phone bill to Montego Bay in another one. His 3.2 GPA is now 2.1 as he forgot to go to the classes he registered for. Even without cracking a book we both got an education so maybe it was money well spent. :rolleyes:

[faerysflower]

lol.... dear god. you had me in stitched with this one. i dont have kids yet but i am praying that mine will be little angels.. yes i know YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!! i can dream can i?

anyway... i only went thru a mild rebelion and maybe mine will do the same....