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View Full Version : FDA Warning Labels


ChinesePussy
12-04-2002, 12:44 PM
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American beer Brewers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol...

May leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.

May make you think you are whispering when you are not.

Is a major factor in dancing like a retard.

May cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

May cause you to think you can sing.

May lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

May make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

May make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in a severe a**-kicking.

Is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

May lead you to believe you are invisible.

May lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

May actually CAUSE pregnancy:D

gekkogecko
12-04-2002, 12:53 PM
Nah, alcohol doesn't actually cause that. Stupid poeple use alcohol as an excuse for doing these things, when they wouldn't normally do them.

The most obnoxious drunks are people who use their drunkeness as an excuse to be obnoxious.

BTW, if you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.

horseman12
12-04-2002, 01:49 PM
i wish they would hurry up! i have several people i would love to put this in thier face and say "see i told you so" !