Who Cares
 

This must be my day for passing on bits of humor ... anyway ... here goes ...

1) Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
(2) Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
(3) Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
(4) If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
(5) Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
(6) If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
(7) Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
(8) Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
(9) Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
(10) What do you call male ballerinas?
(11) Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
(12) Why are Trix only for kids?
(13) If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
(14) Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
(15) If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
(16) If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
(17) If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?
(18) Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
(19) If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
(20) Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
(21) Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
(22) Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
(23) Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

And... just an afterthought... when you read #21, why did you run through both songs real quick to make sure?

ROFL..... cute :)

LMAO:D Loved the afterthought;)

The afterthought is soooooooooo true!

Baa Baa Black Sheep has pretty much the same tune too, for those who are familiar with the rhyme (I'm not sure if that's just an English one, or not)

And btw, do any other English people remember the OLD Alphabet song - the one I learnt at school before we were all tarnished with the likes of Sesame Street?

Why do the Alphabet song,Twinkle Twinkle little Star and Ba Ba Black Sheep all sound alike?? Ah that Mozart,he was such a genius.

Terrific DB. Really funny stuff. TY!! :)

lakritze are you serious.... did Mozart really write the music those nursery rhymes are sung to?

ROTFLMAO, very good

Those are all soooooooooo true... good ones DB.. :D

"Tarnished with the likes of"...........???????????????

Lou? What's wrong with Sesame Street? Many children have grown up with that show (not me....I'm too old.....but I watched it when it first came on TV)........and for the kids of parents who have little time to spend with them......it is a world of knowledge that they might never recieve if not plopped in front of the tube for that show! I just had to beg to differ here (normally I agree with you).

My fave Sesame Street of all time...............Paul McCartney singing......"Letter B, Letter B, (pause) Letter B, ohhhhh, Letter B......whisper words that start with.......Letter B, Letter B".......LOL! I loved that one!

Sesame Street.........No Tarnish!
Priests molesting children.......TARNISH!


Anywayyyyyyyyy......LMAO for the thread db! *hugs*

hey i watched Sesame Street Growing up, I am 23 years old now, and I truly believe that I am able to contain my anger throught the technics I learned on that show. Otherwise I would be a gang banger somewhere maybe ripping you off? who knows? SS is a great show. and Bert and Ernie are just friends!

LOL - OMG wild controversy.

My only problem with Sesame Street is that it teaches children the American Alphabet song. And in case you hadn't noticed, English people do not have a letter 'Zee' we have a letter 'Zed'. The alphabet song I learnt ended in 'Zed' not 'Zee'. That's all! LOL

Loulabelle Zee is just Zeds younger brother




lol

Besides ... omega didn't rhyme. :rolleyes: