The Neverending Story

[Murphy]

I've noticed alot of really GOOD writers on this Board, so here's a game, nay a challenge, to everybody: I'm going to start a story, where it goes is up to all of us here at Pixies. I only have one rule:
NO HOGGING! By that i mean give everybody a chance. Please post one message, then wait for others to add to our work before posting another. Ok? Here goes:


It was a dark and stormy night.
A shot rang out.
A woman screamed.
A ship sailed into the bay.

(Trite, I know, but that too is part of the challenge)

[Sugarsprinkles]

A splash was heard as a body hit the water.
Down, down it sunk into the inky blackness of the river.

Within seconds the darkness was pierced by the flashing lights of a Police patrol car.

[Aqua]

As Captain Dan's car pulled up to the desolate marina, his instincts warned him he was not quite alone. After bringing the '99 Caprice to a stop and calling his location in to the dispatcher, he warily opened the door of his car and slowly stepped out into the wind driven rain.

[Glyndwr]

Aboard the ship Peg-leg Pete strained his eyes into the rain. The lights on the harbour side refected in the dark water, their duplication disturbed only by the gently bobbing corpse.

[ASH]

"What can I do for you" asked Pete, as the captain slowly made his way across the narrow dock, careful not to slip off the side and into the rising water.

[Oldfart]

The Captain hitched his gunbelt, checking that the .44 magnum was close at hand. "I warned you last Sunday about letting "Inflatable Annie" going skinny dipping in our harbour."

[Lovediva]

"Now walk the plank and go fetch her!" As the Captain aims his .44 to the poor Pete's crotch......

[Murphy]

Meanwhile, at the mansion High on the cliff over looking the bay, Our heroine, Divinity, stops screaming in delight. "Oh, Do that again lover, do that againnnnnn."

[Oldfart]

Marcel, to Divintity's delight, again balanced the "Weeping Nun"

dildo on his nose as he hopped aroud the room like a rabbit.

"That is so funny, lover. Know any other tricks?"

[scotzoidman]

Meanwhile, lounging in the hot tub, Shane passed the joint to his girlfriend; a seed popped, sending sparks out which caught her hair on fire. Shane was confused, until he heard the voice of Wayne Newton from the stereo, telling him what to do... "Dunk her, Shane..."

sorry bout that...

[Sugarsprinkles]

So Shane, being stoned as he was, believed that Wayne Newton was directly communicating with him through the stereo. He tried to dunk his girlfriend, but being that she was a BBW, and he's but a 90 pound weakling, he wasn't able to lift her.....

[Glyndwr]

Marcel, turned at the sounds from the tub room unbalancing the dildo on his nose, it fell to the floor. He stepped back but slipped on the vibrating instrument, flailing his arms wildly he fell through the screen knocking the stereo into the tub. The resulting power surge blacked out half the city at precisely the same time that Peg-leg pete decided to rush Captain Dan...in the darkness a shot rang out

[Oldfart]

Bodies blindly entwined as they fell in the water. In the

distance "Inflatable Annie" bobbed, her fixed smile seeming to

mock her pursuers. Divinity clutched her Nun to her as Marcel

looked for the ice and candles.

[Grumble]

soon to be "double Peg Leg" Pete, bleeding profusely from the mangled stump of his headless penis kicked away from Captain Dan and grabbed inflatable Annie for support.

Captain Dan was struggling to stay above water as from the harbour a white pointer shark smelled blood and was drawn to the police man thrashing about.

Patrolman Aquacop screached to a halt on the dockside riding his police motorbike in response to Captain Dan's back up call

[Oldfart]

Patrolman Aquaman looked across the water at the

tableau unfolding before him. A frenzy of teeth, teeth and more

teeth met his gaze. Two men sitting on an inflatable rubber doll

as Neil, the great white shark played water-polo with Pete's

severed willy.

[Murphy]

Divinity screamed again, this time in horror, as Marcell toppled into the tub with Shane and his girlfriend. Gone now were the sounds of Wayne Newton, replaced by the sizzle of electricity and the smell of frying meat.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Tex noticed the lights flicker. "Maw" he said, "There's trouble brewin in the city"

[Oldfart]

In the clear night outside, a caped figure swung

in the direction of Divinity's screams.

"This is a job for Souperman!"

[Murphy]

After the loonnggg blackout, after all the dust had cleared...Souperman stands on the pier....Neil the Shark dangling limp from his upraised arm....Double pegleg Pete lay washed up on the shore astride Inflatable Annie....Aquacop is pulling Captain Dan toward his squad car....and In the mansion high on the cliff overlooking the bay, Marcell wept at the sight of Divinity and Shane simmering in thier own Juices. At the Farm Ma handed Paw his shotgun "Better go find our Divinity Paw".

[Murphy]

Later that evening....after the Coroner had left with the remains of Shane and Divinity, Marcell was consoling Maw and Paw Kettle over the loss of their daughter, Divinity.

Meanwhile, Aquacop, having made several shark steaks was setting up the bar-b-que.....

[Aqua]

Hooking up the propane, Aquacop was quite upset to find the old rusty propane tank had finally run out. Strapping on his shoulder holster, he made his way out to his car. The deep rumble of his '70 Cuda rumbled and echoed back from the nearby hillside. Heading west back into town on highway 77, he had no idea that coming up fast behind him was Tex, thundering down the road in his rust primer red Ford stepside that his Paw had bought from Henry Ford himself. His only purpose at this moment was to settle up with the varmit that killed his best ranch-hand. Hell, killed that Shane fella too.

[Murphy]

(lmao Aqua!)
Tex finally saw the 'cuda growing larger in his headlights. "Damn superheroes, allus a-thinkin they's better then usn's" Laying the shotgun along the door top, he bided his time....waiting for the moment his faithful ford stepside would bring him close enough to the unsuspecting Aqua....

[fzzy]

Meanwhile, Maw is standing with her 3 other daughters, Cherry Delight, Praline and SugarTaffee .... Maw was a wummin with an awful sweet tooth (but I digress) .... discussin' which of Divinity's dresses would be best to put her in for the Wake and funeral .... the girls didn't want to waste a perfectly good dress, but Maw insisted Divinity be laid to rest proper.

[Murphy]

Getting bored with the funeral arrangements, Praline snuck out to the barn, finding Sven, the farmhand, lying naked in the hay stroking himself. Leaning back against a post, her fingers sliding up her sides to her breasts...the nipples hardening at the sight of Sven's meat slipping thru his fist...his closed eyes seeing her not...

[Murphy]

Not being able to control herself, Praline shakily walks over to the fisting Sven....raises her skirts....bends her knees and....

[Sugarsprinkles]

........and kneels between his legs and takes Sven's massive tool in her mouth. His eyes being closed, Sven had no idea he was not alone. The feeling of Praline's mouth around his member shocks him so much that he raises up swiftly and suddenly and with such force that he hits Praline in the head with his own, knocking her unconscious. Thinking he'd killed her, Sven panics....and runs out of the barn....naked, .his cock bouncing and flopping in the breeze as he runs screaming for help...............he doesn't see the rake someone left lying on the ground..........

[Murphy]

...............he doesn't see the rake someone left lying on the ground..........tines up...stepping on it, he is caught between the eyes and falls back, dazed and confused, moaning in pain....Praline, slowly waking, stumbles out of the barn to find Sven lying on the ground... the rake, like his tool, still pointing straight in the air...

[fzzy]

Meanwhile, back at the farmhouse ..... the family is gathering to commence the wake....friends and relations arriving with their own homemade brew and items to snack on when the munchies attach. Ma counts up the numbers and realizes she's missing her darling Praline .... where could the little man-crazy girl have gotten to now she wonders ...

[Murphy]

As Maw begins searching for Praline, Tex is pulling closer to Aquacop's speeding cougar....which careens into the drive leading up to the Kettle's ranch house.....seeing Sven barely in time, Aquacop slams on the brakes, barely missing the rake and body, Tex is not so quick, swerving and skidding across the damp grass comeing finally to rest in the pig wallow... Hearing the commotion, Maw and Praline hurry to see what has happened....

[dzbuster]

while aquacop managed to drag tex from an amourous swine, praline fell atop the stunned sven. maw seeing praline on sven decides that in the interest of family pride and considering the preacher would arrive in the morn for the burial that a wedding is in order. alternating his view between praline's luscious curves and the deep,dark,large holes of maw's o/u 8 gage sven agrees quickly to settle down.

[Murphy]

Meanwhile, Tex stumbles woozilly to his feet...still distraught at the death of his dear sister Divinity, picks up the rake and stumbles toward Aquacop... attempting to pull the non-existant trigger, he suddenly realizes it's not his shotgun...."What happened to my Bessie!" he cries, wondering what witchcraft could have turned his beloved side-by-side twin barrel elephant gun into a rake....

[fzzy]

And as Sven agrees to marry Praline, Cherry Delight and SugarTaffee show up and are green with envy that Praline is gonna get to legally shag it with a guy as "fine" as Sven and they will keep having to resort to the use of assorted veggies .... luckily however, they live on a farm and there are plenty of veggies to pick from!!! ;)

[TinkerBell69]

But something terrible happens, a swarm of unknown insects eat all the vegitables!

[dicksbro]

After eight years without any new story lines ... Captain Dan, now nearing retirement, wondered aloud to his sidekick, Officer Orville, "I wonder what ever happened to Peg Leg Pete (post #4)?"