Cant get off...

[Nic_Hex]

My GF is getting pissed because she cant get me off w/ a blowjob or by hand. We have tried just about everything we can think of (even being drunk) and still no go. Normaly after about 30min of good sucking (MY GOD IS SHE A PRO) Im still not gonna blow. SHes not bad at it..I just take a LONG time...Is there anything her or I can do? I even tried not beating off and it still doesnt work. Its starting to get her mad, and now she says I cant eat her out untill she gets me off! I dont know if I can live knowing I cant taster her sweet pussy. (I mean I BEGG to eat her out) Can some one please help? Im tired of jurking off/her not geting me off. (And seeing her pissed because I can get her off and she cant get me off aint kewl) Thnx..


Nic Hexen

[Sarriah]

HI,
I dont know what to tell you to try, but I do know that being drunk wont make you go faster. In all fact it makes it harder for guys to go when they are drunk. Thats if they can get it up LOL (im talkin real drunk tho not tipsy) How often do you get off ? If you are up to at least once a day then you WILL last longer and there isnt much you can do about it. I know this because me and my hubby went through the same thing. Just let your GF know that its not her and not to feel bad. Have you tried lots of foreplay, and making out, petting and such before she trys to give you a BJ ? cause the more you wait to go down on a man the easier it is to make em go... Sorry I dont have a better answer for you. But Good luck. Maybe you two can sit here on the site together and look at the pics, Then try to get eachother off that way? Just a thought

Sarriah

[BamaKyttn]

My last boyfriend had never gotten off from fellatio but I fixed that... it took two hours a a severe case of lock jaw but it was soooo worth it I dunno what to say but to be patient, both of you.

Always
Kyttn

[Nic_Hex]

Thnx for the advice....and I know theres nothing I can really do...Oh well..thnx..and im still open to ideas..Im about to have her try ice or something of the likes in her mouth..any ideas on that on?

[Sarriah]

have you ever heard of the stuff called "good head" ?? You can get it at most sex shops. Its mint stuff that not only tastes great for her, but feels great on him. Why dont you try that :) we love it ;P

[jay]

yep I recomend the "good head" jelly as well it dose feel good and speeds me up.

[PlayfulTigress]

First off, let me ask this... Have you and your g/f ever had sexual intercourse? Also, are you a younger couple?

For me, personally, it seemed harder to get guys off orally when I was in HS as apposed to my mid twenties now. And, if you are sexually active, I'm sure you'd obviously cum from intercourse. So, you two could enjoy blow jobs as foreplay and then move on to more later! ;)

For some reason, some men just cannot cum (or it takes them a very long time to cum) from oral sex. It's not necessarily a physical or mental problem the guy suffers, it's just the way it is. If you two have not engaged in sexual intercourse yet, and do not feel you are ready for that, you can always suggest 69. That way you can also eat her pussy. Perhaps pleasuring her while you're being pleasured will help to relax your body and help you cum somewhat faster?

~Linds

[Nic_Hex]

We're not to sex YET, but who knows. And I have been thinking about 69, and well, sounds fun to me! And BTW, we are both 18 and loving it. She and I both know its just the way things are w/ me. But she said no talk about sex untill she can get me off. Now I can look at this 2 ways...1) More blow/hand jobs than you can shake a dick at, or 2) Looks like Im not having sex for a LONG TIME. And i dont mind the no sex, but DAMN IT..I like eating her out!! I just wish I could explain to her in a way that she will understand, because she still feels she sucks at blowjobs (in a bad way) when she sucks JUST FINE! In fact she gives the BEST head in the world (well at least that I know of :-P ) Keep the ideas flowing, cuz god knows Im open to a lot of things
(Alos, I just thought of this, I have my cock pierced [Prience Albert] NE one here have that and noticed this problem!?!?!?!)

[GermanSteve]

Nic_Hex, tell us, when DO you have orgasms?

I think, what is happening to you is happening in your head. The most common reason for impotence is any kind of stress.
Let me tell you an example from my personal experience:
I am now married almost three years, and now already waiting 3/4 of a year for my divorce. (In Germany you have to wait 1 year before you can be divorced)
Living with my "monster" was pure horror. A very stressing stuff. That caused that I started being impotent. Finally my only way to get off was masturbating in secret. This woman was my way of getting stress. Now, because I am alone already 9 months, all my manpower has come back.
I think your problem is that you cannot relax in the right way. There is a person watching you, manipulating, sucking your most private thing. And your girlfriend is giving you still more stress by not giving permission to suck her out. You say she is getting pissed. (to be continued)

[GermanSteve]

(part 2)
Surely all that turns you down. Perhaps not completely, but enough not to get off. Not important.
I know how you are feeling.

My tip: look for another girlfriend that in your case just smiles and continues loving you in the same way. By the time you will be able to relax during her presence because she accepts you as you are. And this will be the solution. Do not think you´re not a man because you can´t. Accept that there exist times and situations without the control of your body functions. You are not a machine, you are human.

[Sarriah]

GermanSteve-- I would agree with everything SEPT the get a new girlfriend part, Thats just RUDE. Maybe the fact is is that they are both young, and are just both learning how to be together. Telling him to find someone new because he cant get off for her is wrong. Now if he is unhappy with EVERYTHING in their lives together than yah time to find someone new. The thing about him learning to relax is right he needs to be relaxed and just go with it, I remember when me and my hubby met at age 15 it was hard for us to feel comfortable together, it took some time. BUT thats just it it takes time..We have now been together almost 6 years, 21 and 22 years of age, and things are great. BUT we stuck together and worked things out. The only thing he needs to do is talk to her and TELL Her that his lil issue isnt her fault. SHE needs to be open minded and talk it out with him, her fears her worries her problems. If they cant talk about it and sit and say "you cant eat me if i cant get you off" well that puts strain on the issue and will make it worse. May i sugest that SHE reads these posts and knows that its not her and that you need to work together and be one together.. I dont know what else to say or even if this makes sence. BUT stick together you will be happy one day!! :)
hopes for you
Sarriah

[GermanSteve]

Ok, perhaps that was a little strong. Don´t think it is esasy to me saying that. Everybody has to do and learn of his own mistakes. Sure it is better trying to talk first.
I just say it in my way because that is my result of my mistakes.

[MissX]

Hi there Nic_Hex, Im with PlayfulTigress on the 69 idea, it is really good fun for both involved!

Your girlfriend is making things really hard on herself (and as a reult you), heck I wouldn't want to have to go down on my bloke under that pressure. Is she this hard on herself about other things in her life?

I guess there's no easy answer, it would be good if you could encourage her to play around with the rest of the experience rather than the end result. You know what it is like when there's something upsetting you, you keep thinking about it and focusing on it and soon you stop enjoying the other things that are good.

I hope it works out for you both.
x

[scotzoidman]

2 points I don't think have been covered: oral sex is a learned skill from both sides, maybe this is a touchy subject, but has she ever made any other guy cum? It took years for my lady to bring me off with just her mouth... she wasn't bad at it, it felt great, but getting a guy off is takes a certain knowedge of the sweet spots, and what to do in response to his reactions... & of course, agonizing over it just compounds the problem!
Point 2, the cock piercing might be a problem, I don't have 1st hand knowedge, but any piercing would sever some nerve endings... I don't know what "Prince Albert" means, where does that indicate?

[Sarriah]

Scot the Prince Albert is ummm at one of the sweet spots, so that may be the problem.

[Nic_Hex]

Well..she has no real problem GETTING me close...she just seems to always stop and get pissed as soon as she gets there...And she has NO problem hitting the stops..so who knows...

[scotzoidman]

Well, now, it's gotten so complex that I don't even understand anymore... but I think it's a great idea to hold off on sex, and just please each other manually and/or orally until you both are comfortable with it... which leads to another idea... maybe she doesn't want to get you off, because then she'd have to let you lick her off, then she might get carried away and want you inside her, and then... well, as you say, who knows...

[Nic_Hex]

hehe...she has NP w/ me going down on her...Im thinking its prolly a combo of stress, and wanting to get off. Oh well...it will happen once..and then again,and again!

[katebabe]

hi, i am the infamous girlfriend......:)........I guess i just want to explain why i am sooo upset about this. I love nic very much, and i'm the kind of person who isn't happy unless the person i'm with is happy. I'm a big pleaser and I take it as a sign that i'm not doing what i should be if he isn't getting off. I want our relationship to have a great give/take balance, and i feel like i am taking too much when this happens. :( I have been with very selfish guys before, who want to make sure that they get theirs before i get mine, so being with a sweet, caring guy who doesn't care is a big change for me. I want to try, and believe me, we will try all of the things that you have suggested, especially the not stressing out ones :) thanks for all of your help, and keep it coming!! we appreciate it.

[scotzoidman]

Katebabe, pleased to make your aquaintence, nic's told us so much about you ;) Appears to me your intentions are good, my advice is don't take it personally when he doesn't respond the way you want, and keep practicing! No one starts out being good at oral sex, you're both young, so just relax & enjoy yourselves... he's not keeping a scorecard, & neither should you... sounds like you two have the makings of a wonderful relationship here, I wish you the best... & let us know when you do make him cum! (note I say "when", not "if") :D

[Nic_Hex]

hehe...funny you said something about a score card. Thats been her an my lil joke. We have tally marks on my wall...it started off cuz I wanted to know how many times we have "messed around" and turned into..Who won that night. Myself Im just happy to "please" her...I just HOPE (Kate) that things are understood..and Scotz SHE IS good at oral! (hehehe) Just have to wait a lil..C ya!

[scotzoidman]

SHE IS good at oral! Guess I should have qualified that statement, too... no such thing as "bad" oral sex... didn't mean to imply that she isn't good, if she likes trying to please you, then it's all good... just saying it takes lots of practice to get "really good" at oral... and that goes both ways... sex, like life, should be about the journey, not the destination...

[Nic_Hex]

Tru tru...and let me say this...she knows what shes doing..just cant do it long enuff! hehe

[Nic_Hex]

Well...tonite the prob was fixed..and about 10 sec B4 her mom walked in the room! So...thnx for the advice, and ya know what..keep it coming...we need ideas for more fun! Thnx a mill!

[katebabe]

wooo hooooo!! It finally happened!! (even with my brother in the next room, and my mom walking in the door hehe) I got him off on a hand job, and may i say........I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT!!! ;) and i think he did too. hehe Now, we still have a ways to go with the Oral thing, but this is a great start!!! Keep the encouragement coming, lord knows i need it!

[Aqua]

Congratz Kate and Nic!! This will only lead to more wonderful things... just be sure and play it safe! WooHoo!!

[scotzoidman]

That's great news, kidz... I knew you both could do it, was it the danger of getting caught factor that pushed you over the top? Whatever, congrats, and keep us up to date on the oral... ;)

[Nic_Hex]

Not really Scotz..I was coming and her bro yelled..MOMS HOME..and then I was like.."OH SHIT! Kt get me some paper towels ASAP!" and then we kinda laffed about it later...
NOTE TO ALL....dont eat gummie bears afterwords..they start to kinda smell/taste like what you had ur hands in/on...and if you do...give some to some one you dont really like and laff at em! hehe

[MissX]

Congrats and big smooches all round!
Wishing you lots and lots more fun :D
x

[Nic_Hex]

Thnx. Man to think..I have 16 posts and people CARE about what used to be a problem! I love this place!
<me>cries</me> Its such a happy place! hehehe
Now, to find a way to make it so ppl really want to TALK to me..hmm..only time (and a sign of god) can do that one!

[GermanSteve]

Katebabe, Nic_Hex, sorry for what I said at the beginning about new girlfriend... I can see that you are youngsters and surely cannot know everything. Stress is always bad for good sex.
One thing that is always good for a relation is talking about your own opinion and wishes, but respecting the ones of the other one.
Congratulations, have much fun, and be welcome here.