View Full Version : Slippery-Dip Product Launch Party
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:00 PM
You are cordially invited
to attend the private product launch celebration
for the OldFart SLIPPERY-DIPTM,
also known as the S.O.F.A. (Scotzoid & Old Fart Apparatus).
We will unveil the first prototype and the proposed marketing package at the festivities.
Hors d'oevres will be served, and an open bar (featuring champagne, Chateau la Face '69, and Buttescotch Schnapps, among other favourite drinks) will be provided. Guests will have the opportunity to mingle (fluids) and to schmooze (or smooch), prior to the actual unveiling (or disrobing) of the much-anticipated Slippery-Dip.
Apparel: Black tie... only.
Location: The home of Sweetstuff, Graphic Designer and Social Coordinator, OSHA, in the scenic north-country
Time: Now... oh god, baby... now!!!!
R.S.V.P. A.S.A.P. c/o:
OldFart & Scotz' Happyface Agency,
69 Cunning Court,
Orgasm on Time,
Slipshire, UK
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:02 PM
Ladies and Gentlement, may I present to you...
The proposed marketing package for the OldFart Slippery-Dip!
*applause*
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:04 PM
And now, Mesdames et Messieurs, the moment you've all been waiting for...
It is my very great honour to present to you...
The prototype model for the greatest invention since sliced bread...
The OldFart Slippery-Dip!
*thundering applause*
:D :D Now that is a piece of work!! :D :D
Nice to see a woman laying back on the slide too!!
TRES BIEN!!
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:05 PM
Let the party begin!!!!!!!!!
Lilith
02-01-2002, 05:06 PM
You are too cute! That is fun! ~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Well it doesn't seem like we have all the appropiate party's present for an official testing... :(
But I'm certainly ready to take my place on the Slippery Dip™! ;) :p
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:18 PM
We'll have all the official speechifying when the President and the CEO/Director arrive... For now, the bar's open, so let's party!!!
We need to make sure everyone's well lubricated before any testing can occur --- anyone up to helping me with that onerous task? ;)
--- sweetstuff
Lady Pleaser
02-01-2002, 05:18 PM
Since I'm one of the first here I hope i get a good spot on the S-D.:p :o :D
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:20 PM
LadyPleaser --- You mean there are bad spots on it? :confused:
Lady Pleaser
02-01-2002, 05:23 PM
Not really but if I get on the bottem step all the ladys will have to climb over me.;)
Lilith
02-01-2002, 05:30 PM
is that a problem or a benefit?~~~~>Lilith
Gee Sweetstuff, wouldn't mind helping you with anything... ;)
Lady Pleaser
02-01-2002, 05:44 PM
Lilith it's a benefit thats why I tring to save the spot for me.:p
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:45 PM
Not really but if I get on the bottem step all the ladys will have to climb over me.
That's one of the beauties of perpetual motion, LadyPleaser... See, the best part of this design is the infinite staircase on which it's based. The more ladies slide down over you, the closer you are to the top. And the closer you are to the top, the sooner it will be your turn to slide... That's why it's called Perpetual Motion Playground Equipment!
Enjoy!!!
--- sweetstuff
Lady Pleaser
02-01-2002, 05:49 PM
OK so were are the President and CEO/Director so we can unveil the S-D. As HEAD of research and development I like to start the research.
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:53 PM
Originally posted by Lady Pleaser
OK so were are the President and CEO/Director so we can unveil the S-D. As HEAD of research and development I like to start the research.
Ummmm...
Shouldn't that read: "As head of R&D I lick to start the research"??? :p
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 05:54 PM
Gee Sweetstuff, wouldn't mind helping you with anything... ;)
Thanks, Aquaman --- might as well just dive right in, don't you think? ;)
Like I say...
l
l
l
l
l
l
l
l
l
\/
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 06:01 PM
ROTFLMAO@Aquaman!!!!!! :D
Lady Pleaser
02-01-2002, 06:16 PM
SFC yes it should be Lick, sorry about the typo.:D
P.S. Great graphics you really out did yourself with the drawings.
Originally posted by sugarfreecandy
ROTFLMAO@Aquaman!!!!!! :D
You know.... ROTFLMAO is just a couple vowels short of being a new, hi-performance Italian sports car... :cool:
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 06:43 PM
You know.... ROTFLMAO is just a couple vowels short of being a new, hi-performance Italian sports car... :cool:
Hey, good idea, Aquaman! High-performance Italian sportscars make great sex toys too... Maybe the OSHA should look at them as a potential new product line! :D
Remind me to put that idea forward at the next board meeting.
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 08:14 PM
Okay, so we've unveiled the design scheme... But I still need a little help getting this thing all set up before the President and the CEO/Director arrive! I've got the instruction sheet here, but I think it requires more than one person to operate... Remember, we can't actually try it out until they get here, but we can darned well get ready!!! :p
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 08:16 PM
Oh, man, I really need help... I forgot the instructions! :o
Originally posted by sugarfreecandy
Oh, man, I really need help... I forgot the instructions! :o
Here... Climb up this ladder and I'll stand underneath to hold it steady... with the aerial view you should be able to figure out what goes where... (I know I will... ;) )
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 09:09 PM
So kind of you to help me, Aquaman --- but be careful, don't get that black tie of yours dirty! (It's the only part I'm not willing to help clean off...) :p :D Apart from that, enjoy the view! ;)
Oldfart
02-01-2002, 10:31 PM
Ladies and Gentlemen.
It is with great pleasure that I call together the
SOFA test team to initiate phase 2 of this marvellous
endeavour. I am gratified to see all the eager and intent
faces before me, and feel proud to have the support
of so many perverts.
I now hand you over to my principal collaborator in this
wonderful venture.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, Scotzoidman.
sugarfreecandy
02-01-2002, 10:38 PM
... Thunderous applause, as the crowd goes wild in appreciation for the men who have brought them such a stupendous creation ... Women swoon and throw panties at the speakers' platform ... Then a hushed silence falls as we all wait for the words of the Birthday Boy-slash-President of OSHA, Mr. Scotzoidman ...
scotzoidman
02-01-2002, 11:16 PM
Huh?...what...oh, they're waitin for me?... gee, I, uhhhhh...
Is this thing on... testing 1-2-3... sorry I'm so late, I was getting a blo- uh, that is, I was meeting with a ... potential investor... yeh, that's it... so what can I say, but... hell, let's crank this puppy up, & see if it yelps...
Y'know, that's the trouble with building a Perpetual Motion device... can't seem to stop working on it...
Lilith
02-01-2002, 11:19 PM
she has envisioned this moment for weeks, years, decades (time escapes me). Perpetual pleasure, what will these boys think up next........~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
xanne
02-01-2002, 11:50 PM
I'm all excited now! :D
I love parties!! Especially for something as important and interesting as the Slippery Dip.
Mmmm, can I have more of the Chateau la Face 69 while we are waiting .............:p :p
sugarfreecandy
02-02-2002, 12:08 AM
The hostess goes dancing through the excited crowd, whispering in the ears of her guests as she passes with her tray of champagne...
Delighted you could make it, Scotz! Sorry to tear you away from your, er, 'meeting' --- but I promise this will be worth it!!! Here, follow me, perhaps you could explain the basis of this wonderful contraption to Lilith; the girl's been marvelling at it all night...
*
Lilith, dear, do you realize that you're about to go down in history as the first woman ever to experience this Perpetual Pleasure!!! We're all sooooooo envious... But I'm right behind you in line! Scotz here is going to give you a personal tour to get things started, I believe, isn't that right, sir?
*
Xanne, great to see you! The party's just getting going, now that the dignitaries have finished their speeches. While you're waiting your turn for the Slippery-Dip, I'm positive that OldFart would be delighted to share a bottle or two of that Chateau le Face '69 with you --- look, he's hovering over the case of it over at the bar, waiting for someone to come along and give him an excuse to have a glass or three... :rolleyes: :D Here, let me introduce you, if you haven't already met...
*
OldFart, dahhhling, this is a simply smashing invention. Come, pour a glass of your ClF '69 for Xanne here, she's looking absolutely scrumptious in her heels (and nothing else) and she's looking for a gentleman to introduce her to the delights of this vintage wine. I think you're just the chap to do it!
scotzoidman
02-02-2002, 01:18 AM
Of course, since Miz Lil has taken the position of Straw Boss & rode herd on me to finish the device, she certainly gets 1st in line to test the mechanism... this way, my dear Lady...
BTW, before we begin, Xanne (and anyone else wearing them) must remove her heels before entering the ride, fetching as she is in them... they may damage critical parts of the machinery, wouldn't want that to happen & spoil the ride... (speaking of which, does anybody know why porn actors/actresses never take off their shoes? One of the great Mysteries of Life I wonder about...)
Prophet Reality
02-02-2002, 04:50 AM
Hey wait for me. As Head of Quality Control I need to make sure that this device is put together correctly.
Yep, yep it looks okay and sturdy. Should be able to send the ladies down at least 1,000 times before we need to make any replacements or trade outs.
Okay everyone, positions please. Let's rock this joint.
Prophet Reality
02-02-2002, 04:54 AM
Hey Scotz... The porn actresses leave their shoes on so that their feet are not showing. Most people are not very proud of how their feet look, so they keep the shoes or socks on. Not too mention, if they should get raided it is one less thing to have to put on. Or at least that is what I was told once.
sugarfreecandy
02-02-2002, 07:01 AM
Hooray! We have approval from quality control! Is there anyone else whose department needs to approve this slide before we start? If so, speak up... If not, then everyone take your spots and let's get ready to have fun!!!!
Safety checklist:
Has everyone removed their shoes and any other potentially damaging implements? ... Check!
Has everyone read and understood the liability waiver? ... Aw heck, who cares about this legal mumbo-jumbo, I'll check that off anyway!
Is everyone sufficiently lubricated? And is the vat of Butterscotch Schnapps in position at the top of the Infinite Staircase and ready to be turned on in case we need extra lube? ... Check! *slurp* Check again! :p
Is everyone excited? ... Yeah, baby, yeah! Check!
In that case, OldFart and Scotz can come right over here and cut the big red ribbon, and then Lilith can become the first woman ever to experience Perpetual Pleasure!!!!!!!!!!
Lilith
02-02-2002, 10:51 AM
She begins to ascend the soon to be infamous device, first cimbing over Lady Pleaser, who deviously chose the bottom step, passing Prophet, then Nutworld, Aquaman is next, pantyfanatic waits next, Scotz and OldFart have chosen a centralized position in order to keep things running slick. As she ascends she notices that more and more of the lovely Pixie's Men (your name enters here ;) )are taking their place at the top of this seemngly never ending :) pleasure toy. There are so many wonderful men waiting for the adventure to begin. Lilith figures she will soon be very *personally* introduced to all of these men who have kept her stimulated and in suspense for so long. She wonders if such a glorious climax to her secret desires is really possible and considers backing out for fear that all other sexual encounters from here on will simply pale by comparison. But not being one to turn away from an adventure Lilith stands atop the device and makes the speech(like the 1st astronaut on the moon)," This is one small lick for women and one perpetual orgasm for womenkind, thank you!" and she dives headfirst into the ams of the first awaiting gentleman, and so history begins...................
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!,uuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm,oh God yes Oh God, yes yes yes yes yes, ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo yes!, a little to the left, oh yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss, more more more, oh yes harder, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm just like that, hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, slurp slurp slurp, ooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!, ooooooooooooooooooooo, long chains of barely audible groans,yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes................
~~~~~~~
~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Lady Pleaser
02-02-2002, 10:57 AM
As Lilith has (slurp) climbed abour the Slipper-Dip it is now time to let the fun begin.:p :p :p :p
Oldfart
02-02-2002, 01:01 PM
Ladies and gentlemen
Let the games begin.
sugarfreecandy
02-02-2002, 02:23 PM
Originally posted by Lilith
..."This is one small lick for women and one perpetual orgasm for womenkind, thank you!" and she dives headfirst into the ams of the first awaiting gentleman, and so history begins...................
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!,uuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm,oh God yes Oh God, yes yes yes yes yes, ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo yes!, a little to the left, oh yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss, more more more, oh yes harder, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm just like that, hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, slurp slurp slurp, ooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!, ooooooooooooooooooooo, long chains of barely audible groans,yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes................
"Me next, me next, ME NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" :D :D :D :D :D :D
As I clamber over Lilith on my way to the top of the Infinite Staircase, I pause for a brief moment to ask her "Was it really that good?" --- but there's no response. She's obviously still caught in the throes of Perpetual Pleasure! This makes me all the more eager to try this out for myself, so up the stairs I run, past all of my favourite Pixies' men (and some favourite Pixies' women as well, I might add)! I get to the top, check quickly for safety, and then yell at the top of my lungs:
"Anchors aweigh!!!!!! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
sugarfreecandy
02-02-2002, 02:33 PM
..............................................................................................................
When I finally reach the bottom of the Great Pixies' Chain of Pleasure, in a state of absolute rapture the likes of which I have never before experienced, I collapse in a delightfully satiated heap just below Lilith on the stairs. My head lolls backwards, my tongue hangs from my open mouth, and my legs sprawl.
I'm too far gone to think at this point, but sometime later it will occur to me that I've just discovered an unexpected benefit to this design --- the pleasure itself that one experiences during the ride prompts one to assume the perfect position for future sliders at the end of it! The next slider can cum down even before I finish my orgasm, because I'm already in the correct slide formation! (That OldFart's a genius, I tell you!)
But it'll be another hour or two before I regain my logical function --- meanwhile, I lie back in utter delight, and wait for the next slider....... Whoever it will be.........................
Oldfart
02-03-2002, 11:23 AM
Confession time.
I have for some time now been channelling M C Escher and
MC always wished for the logical conclusion to his drawing
"Relativity".
Pixies and the SOFA have given this to him.
Relativity depicts staircases which are always downhill
and a fully subscribed Escher-SOFA means that one slides
around the slide until active intervention removes you.
SFC, I need thoughts on a removal device which won't
interrupt the flow.
We also have a chance to find the answer to the oldest riddle
in erotica, "What does a woman do after a 24hour orgasm?"
While we need to work the kinks out of the Mark1 before
we proceed to the Mark2(E-S), input is required in this heroic
undertaking.
MC thinks so too.
sugarfreecandy
02-03-2002, 11:44 AM
Confession time.
I have for some time now been channelling M C Escher and MC always wished for the logical conclusion to his drawing "Relativity". Pixies and the SOFA have given this to him. Relativity depicts staircases which are always downhill and a fully subscribed Escher-SOFA means that one slides around the slide until active intervention removes you.
That's odd, OF, I've been having distinctly Escherian impulses as well as I've worked on the prototype... Are you by any chance channelling him to me?
SFC, I need thoughts on a removal device which won't interrupt the flow.
While I can't imagine ever wanting to be removed from this marvellous contraption, I think the best option would be to have a flexible staircase. If a participant wished for whatever delusional reason to leave the slide, the staircase could lower him or her to the ground, folding in such a way that the participants on either side would be brought together. This would allow for uninterrupted flow, which I agree must be our primary goal. I obviously need to work on a functional design for this, but picture a ribbon being folded, with a hanging loop. The participant who wants to leave is lowered in that loop.
Alternatively, the removal device could take the form of the ROTFLMAO High-Performance Italian Sportscar that Aquaman suggested earlier.
We also have a chance to find the answer to the oldest riddle in erotica, "What does a woman do after a 24hour orgasm?"
Ummmmm....... Still researching this. It hasn't been 24 hours yet since I slid... But I'll be able to tell you soon! :o :D :o
While we need to work the kinks out of the Mark1 before we proceed to the Mark2(E-S), input is required in this heroic undertaking.
MC thinks so too.
Agreed. Apparently Freud thinks so as well. See my comments in the LOM's Double-Dog-Dared thread --- I think that we need to explore the possibilities of a Freudian Slip-pery Dip in conjunction with our work on the Mark2(E-S). The possibilities are quite literally endless... For which I am eternally grateful! :o
--- sweetstuff
Oldfart
02-03-2002, 12:00 PM
SFC.
I have been thinking of your channel for ages.
The extraction device I have been loath to mention, as it
carries elements of crass commercialism, is taken
from the new Bond movie "The Spy who Fucked my Brains Out
and Threw me on the SOFA".
In Bond's new car, a ROTFLMAO 2500, he eludes a persistant
SMERSH assassin intent on sucking him to death by means
of Q's last great invention, the ejection tongue.
Sorry.
sugarfreecandy
02-03-2002, 01:14 PM
Originally posted by Oldfart
SFC.
I have been thinking of your channel for ages.
The extraction device I have been loath to mention, as it
carries elements of crass commercialism, is taken
from the new Bond movie "The Spy who Fucked my Brains Out
and Threw me on the SOFA".
In Bond's new car, a ROTFLMAO 2500, he eludes a persistant
SMERSH assassin intent on sucking him to death by means
of Q's last great invention, the ejection tongue.
Sorry.
The Ejection Tongue!!!! Now why didn't I think of that??? OF, you're a genius. Please let me know when the first working models are built, as I think I need to familiarize myself with our new product as soon as possible.
As for the crass commercialism, this product is so revolutionary and so extraordinarily delightful that I think any means of drawing the public's attention to it is certainly justified. Besides, I've always had a thing for Bond... ;)
--- sweetstuff
hey sorry I'm late but as head of the maintenance dept. I have been quite busy refilling the self lubing mechenisim and what not how ever my shift has just ended and I put on my tie so is there room for me ont the machine??
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 12:19 AM
Jay! Come on in! Glad you could join us...
Sure, there's lots of room on the Slippery-Dip! And you of all people know just how well lubed up I --- I mean, it is... :p
So do you want to be part of the slide, or do you want to go down in history as our first-ever male slider? (I know Lilith, Xanne, and I, and all the other women here will do our best to make that first slide memorable for whichever man decides to take the plunge...) :p :o :p
--- sweetstuff
p.s. OldFart: reports are in regarding the 24-hour orgasm investigation. It appears that immediately after the 24-hour orgasm brought about by the Slippery-Dip device, 100% of our respondent* declared herself ready to do it all over again.
*(A single respondent, yes, but I made sure to do a very thorough investigation of myself!)
can I start at lilith and slide down from there or do I have to go all the way to the top its a long way up and I'm tired from the long day at "work"
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 12:29 AM
Sure, Jay, you can start wherever you like --- but be warned, you're cutting your trip short. We'll try to make it worth your while, though! :p :o :p
(When we get our Mark2[E-S] model developed we won't have to deal with this problem anymore --- you'll be able to start wherever and slide forever... But for now, I can tell you from personal experience that this model is mighty fine as is!!! I'm sliding again after you!!!!)
--- sweetstuff
as head of the maint. dept. I'd be happy to go over the designs for the mark2[e-s] tomorow in my private office how ever it will have to be a candle light meeting cause my lights arent uh... working yah thats it.
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 12:44 AM
Why certainly... I'd be happy to bring along my schematic drawings... Will we have all the other department heads there as well? I know Prophet and LadyPleaser will be sorry to be left out... I think we all need to work together very closely! However, if you think we need to review the design one-on-one before we go into any larger group meetings, I would be happy to devote my complete attention to you --- I mean, to the designs... Have your people contact my people, we'll be lunch ---- ummm, I mean, we'll do each other ---- no, no, no, I mean, we'll do lunch. Yeah, that's it, we'll do lunch! :D
--- sweetstuff
scotzoidman
02-04-2002, 01:26 AM
Just in case you think this design was an easy, slap-together installation, OldFart shared with me some of the initial engineering studies that went into making the SOFA a reality... many sleepless nights went into this one study alone...
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 01:42 AM
This is exactly why we pay you guys the big bucks, Scotz --- that is a masterpiece of engineering. I'm glad we have such fine minds contributing with such tremendous dedication to our glorious project... :D
--- sweetstuff
motega20
02-04-2002, 02:06 AM
All I have to say is count me in... I can't sit here typing when there are more important things to do!
Lilith
02-04-2002, 08:21 AM
24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24hr. continual orgam results in24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24 hr. continual orgasm results in 24 hr. continual orgasm results in .................
a loss of organized thoughts and ability to concentrate.~~~~~~~~~>Lilith(I think it's me. I have lost track of where I stop and another starts)
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 01:17 PM
Motega --- I like your can-do attitude! Come on, hop up, and start sliding!!!!!!!!!!!! :p :o :p :o :p
Lilith --- Pleased to see the results of my investigation have been independently validated. I too have noted that same lack of organized thoughts, concentration, and any recognition of limits to the perceived self --- I think this requires a great deal of further investigation, don't you? I hope you'll continue to run studies parallel to my own so we can compare results (and because, heck, it's just so much fun!)...
--- sweetstuff
Where do I get in line... I really need to go for a ride! (I wonder how I can slow myself down when I'm passing SFC...??) :p
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 01:29 PM
Aquaman, glad you made it back to the party! Start right up there, and you can cum on down that slide as many times as you like! Don't worry about slowing yourself down as you slip by --- I'll make sure to catch you as you cum past so as I can thank you properly for all your help in getting things set up... :p :o :p :o :p
--- sweetstuff
Oldfart
02-04-2002, 03:35 PM
Recursive Orgasm Syndrome
My God, Scotz.
We're up for Nobel Prizes in Engineering and Medicine.
Where will it end?
sugarfreecandy
02-04-2002, 05:26 PM
Originally posted by Oldfart
Recursive Orgasm Syndrome
My God, Scotz.
We're up for Nobel Prizes in Engineering and Medicine.
Where will it end?
... And very very well-deserved nominations they are too, gentlemen. Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!
There is, however, one thing you appear not to have grasped with regard to Recursive Orgasm Syndrome --- namely, that by definition, it will not end! That is precisely the beauty of it, and precisely the reason why its discovery merits such prestigious recognition. Please, this is a crucial point to understaaa... ahhhhhhhhhhh... ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... oh god... oooooooooooooh... yesssss... ohhh yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... uhhhhhhh... to understand.
Another point you will want to keep clear in the medical literature, as you prepare it: most people with a medical condition are said to 'suffer' from an 'affliction'; however, those us us who have ROS cannot correctly be said to 'suffer' from the condition in the least. Suffering is simply not the correct verb in this case. (If this is torture, chain me to the wall.) We seem to experience continual and unavoidable waves of delight, accompanied by a sudden lack of... ohhhhhhhhhhh... yeah... mmmmmmmmmm... aaaaaaaaaaaaah... ahhhhhhhhhhh... ohhhhhhhhhhhh... oh god yes... oh baby... ohhhhhhhh... ummmmm... a sudden lack of coherence and of inhibition. While we do not under any circumstances view this as a problem, it can make clear communication a little more difficult at times. We hope that you will continue to accomodate our needs.
:o
--- sweetstuff
Lilith
02-04-2002, 05:48 PM
concurs, expressing her happiness at having this "affliction" but her words are unrecognizable and so could this be categorized as a Speech/Language disorder or in other words a Lingual A-flick(as in bean)-tion? Tell me doctors.........~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Well Sweetstuff,
I think that soon Scotz and OF are gonna be to busy with acceptance speeches and awards ceremonies...
And since you have needs, I think I have something to help accomodate them... :p :o :p :o :p :o
(Does the Slippery Dip™ have a mininum number of people required??) I would guess at least two... :p :o (hehe)
scotzoidman
02-04-2002, 08:23 PM
Originally posted by Oldfart
Recursive Orgasm Syndrome
My God, Scotz.
We're up for Nobel Prizes in Engineering and Medicine.
Where will it end? Well... I hope it ends up with us getting those "big bucks" that SFC mentioned!
But even w/o the awards, gives me a warm feeling to know our efforts have resulted in the betterment of womankind everywhere, by helping them get in touch with their inner pervert...
Lilith
02-04-2002, 08:25 PM
It's good to know that my eternal gratitude is reward enough for you;) ~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Oldfart
02-05-2002, 08:22 AM
When you're as old as Scotz, stuff eternity,
A very very long now should suffice.
David
02-05-2002, 09:41 AM
OK, I have been travelling for three days on snow shoes to get here!! Now my beaver stick is ready. Do I take my snow shoes off or leave them on? Gee it is hard to get up to the top with these snow shoes on!! :D
sugarfreecandy
02-05-2002, 04:21 PM
Lilith ---
Could this be categorized as a Speech/Language disorder or in other words a Lingual A-flick(as in bean)-tion?
That seems like a very apt description to me! :p
Aquaman --- Such a gentleman, always willing to help a girl out of a sticky situation! Hop up here onto the slide! Looks like we've got plenty of people here on the Slippery-Dip at the moment, but stick around as the party clears out later, and we'll see if we can figure out the MNI (Minumum Number of Individuals) --- purely for, er, research purposes, of course! :D
Scotz ---
Gives me a warm feeling to know our efforts have resulted in the betterment of womankind everywhere, by helping them get in touch with their inner pervert...
Women everywhere thank you and OldFart eternally, from the bottoms of our hearts... Our inner perverts have never been happier. Of course, it looks as though plenty of you men are enjoying this as well --- but I know that's just a pleasant side-effect of your splendid devotion to our cause! Such selfless generosity! ;)
And David --- Welcome, eh! Glad you could make it! Leave ths snowshoes over in the corner (we have a rule about footwear on the slide) and cum on up and take a turn on the slide!
sxxxy14u
02-05-2002, 06:25 PM
Is it my turn yet???
PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEE LET ME GO FOR A RIDEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
I've been waiting for an invention of this magnitude for years!!!
*climbing on!!!*
ooooooooooooo yessssssssssssssssssss!!!
yessssssssssssssssssssssss!!!
OOOOOOOOOOOOO GODDDDDDDDDDD YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!
scotzoidman
02-06-2002, 12:44 AM
Originally posted by Oldfart
When you're as old as Scotz, stuff eternity,
A very very long now should suffice. Careful, ole chap... a smartass remark jumps to mind, but I was raised to respect my elders...:yellghst:
Oldfart
02-06-2002, 06:34 AM
Then do so.
Oldfart
02-06-2002, 06:38 AM
Scotz,
As I said to a mate of mine, "Methuselah, " I said,
"Methuselah, sonny, you respect your elders or I'll
tell Scotzoidman on you."
Lilith
02-06-2002, 07:06 AM
quit your bickering and get back on the slide. I am almost recovered enough to ride again and the two of you are vital to the experience;) ~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Oldfart
02-06-2002, 07:49 AM
Yas'm
Ah's back on de slide.
Look, I'se bein' good on de slide.
Don' beat me missus!!!
Oldfart
02-06-2002, 07:52 AM
She didn't do nothin Missus,
beat me instead..................
Beaten into submission by a nipple or two.............
sugarfreecandy
02-06-2002, 09:19 AM
Sxxxy14u --- It's soooooo worth the wait, isn't it? :o :D
Lilith --- You go, girl! Way to keep those men in line... I think you deserve the titles of Chief Motivator and Head of Internal Operations, unless you had your eye on any other... errr... positions?
OldFart --- Methuselah? Sonny? ROTFLMAO!!! You're too much! I love it!!!!
--- sweetstuff
p.s. I've figured out how to classify ROS: it's undoubtedly an STD --- sexually transmitted delight, that is! :p :o :p :o :p :D
Prophet Reality
02-06-2002, 12:34 PM
As Head of Quality Control, exactly how do we get a break around here? I mena I know you women are enjoying our tongues and other parts, but how about a quiclk releif. Maybe some of that Schnapps and then back on the ride.
UUhhhh better yet, how about adding the Schnapps to the ride?
Prophet Reality
02-06-2002, 12:36 PM
Originally posted by Lilith
quit your bickering and get back on the slide. I am almost recovered enough to ride again and the two of you are vital to the experience;) ~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
Please tell me that the above statement isn't true? I know I have been busy on the slide, but to forget about little ole' me.... :(
Lilith
02-06-2002, 01:34 PM
I could never ever leave you out! I thought you were still on the slide because all the women looked so happy as they came :) down from it! Your position is secure, no one could fill me... I mean it, like you!
OF~ Where's my whip? After a couple of Buttery Nipples I always seem to drop that thing.......
SFC~Chief Motivator and Head of Internal Affairs.... I would be so honored to work for such a prestigious company with such a fine reputation among those in the business(of pleasure);)
~~~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
welcome to the team lilith as head of the maint. dept. I think its my dutie to invite you and the other dept. heads to a gang...... imean group meeting. if you can tear your self away from the slide
Lovediva
02-09-2002, 12:38 PM
Damn....I always miss the good parties. :( :(
Lilith
02-09-2002, 01:19 PM
The great thing about this party is it is perpetual so grab a drink, kick off your shoes, and head on up the apparatus. It's the ride of a lifetime!~~~~~~~~~~>Lilith
scotzoidman
02-09-2002, 07:20 PM
Haven't missed a thing, Diva, expect maybe the beta testing... we've worked all the bugs out now! (not that there were any complaints from the beta testers... few cases of ROS, but no one's complaining!)
xanne
02-09-2002, 08:45 PM
I was called away and was afraid the party would be over.........:(
Thank goodness, but I forgot it is perpetual!! :D :p
Yayyyy, I can dive back in..........mmmmmm.......is there anymore butterscotch schnapps? :o
sugarfreecandy
02-11-2002, 02:03 AM
Yippee!!! Hooray for Perpetual Parties! Every single one of us can wander in and out, taking breaks and/or holidays as needed, but thanks to our two dearest inventors, the party just keeps on rocking!
Prophet --- If you feel that the Butterscotch Schnapps solution should be implemented, by all means, please do so! I think the lubrication sounds like an excellent idea, both physically and socially!
Lilith --- Glad you've decided to accept the titles! Let me tell you, board meetings here are unlike any you've ever experienced before...
... And on that note ...
Jay --- Just a thought on that gang, er, I mean, group meeting --- why not hold it here on the slide, where we can continue to meet the needs of board members with ROS, like Lilith and myself, and still continue to deal with all the finer points of administration? Please?
Diva --- Like the others said, this is one party that you just can't miss! Not only is it perhaps the most important event in the sexual liberation movement since they switched from plate-armour chastity belts to fabric undergarments, but you also literally can't miss it, because it's perpetual and infinite! Gotta love a party that can claim that! :D Scotz is exactly right about the ROS thing, though, might want to watch out for it --- in other words, hurry up and contract a case of it yourself, you'll be glad you did! ;)
And Xanne --- Welcome back! Pick yourself a good executive title, and come on board the board of directors too! :cool:
--- sweetstuff
Oldfart
02-11-2002, 04:15 AM
Even when you're not here, you've had such a formative
influence on the Forum that you're here even whan you're not.
You don't escape that easily.
Lady Pleaser
02-11-2002, 06:05 PM
Where's the schnapps? I need to relubricate my tongue:p :p
Oldfart
02-12-2002, 07:48 AM
Surely the lubrication supplied by our delightful
slide patrons is sufficient.
Lilith
05-09-2002, 09:47 AM
Just wondering if this wonderful apparatus could be transported to Sadora's Pixies Party.... I would just have to supervise it's transport and be prepared to try it out upon delivery to ensure everyone's safety :p
sadora
05-09-2002, 10:06 AM
Lilith-
Ooooh yes! What a wonderful idea!! I get to be next since it's my party right?
What a wonderful invention! I missed out on it in February! Now I have to wait 'till August!?!?
At least I get the experience!!
horseman12
05-09-2002, 10:54 AM
don't care the spot is just point me to it....................:-)
Well it won't be transported for awhile Sadora, hop on! I'll be waiting for you to slide by... ;) :p
I can't believe I missed this in february!! all of you having this perpetual party and not telling me. Oh well, guess it's not too late. ME NEXT, ME NEXT!!!! PLEASE!!!
Oldfart
05-10-2002, 01:38 AM
It's good to see the SOFA dusted off and given a run.
sadora
05-10-2002, 08:16 AM
*prepares herself.... knowing she may never get off this contraption* Here we go! Weeeeee!
Scarecrow
05-10-2002, 10:37 AM
Ah, now this is a machine I could learn to like. Any more room on board.(Maybe I could get Glenda the good to help move it.)
scotzoidman
05-10-2002, 03:12 PM
Lookup the number at the patent office, I think we've created perpetual motion....
sadora
05-12-2002, 11:45 AM
Oh my!! mmmmm, wooo!
I need to have one of these in my backyard!
Oldfart
05-12-2002, 12:34 PM
Sadora.
The SOFA, like the Lone Ranger and other heroes, will always
show up where needed.
Just hope and wish hard enough, and send a cheque to
'Madam Sugarfreecandy,
The SOFA Rental Company,
Lingual Way,
Bliss-on-Riding.'
I'm sure SFC'll assist in any way she can, as trustee of the
SOFA for President Foundation.(R)
danziggy
05-12-2002, 01:53 PM
hey how did i miss this???
can i have a go??can i.... can i????
i want some of the chateu face 69 too..??
icecreamthighs
05-12-2002, 01:57 PM
:D
I cant believe i've missed this thread.......but i have taken off my heels etc and am standing here in a bow tie slurping '69
forgive me if this has already been redressed but is there an emergency stop button, just in case er someone er gets an appendage um lodged somewhere? :D :D
scotzoidman
05-12-2002, 11:36 PM
Damn... I knew we had overlooked something in the design... but I think no one will mind if this ride comes to a halt for a few moments...
sugarfreecandy
05-13-2002, 03:35 PM
OMG, rental SOFAs... OF, you are indeed a genius. Perhaps we can rent out Pixies' members as well, to help smaller groups experience the full potential of this marvellous design. I would be happy to take on the positions of Treasurer and Rental Clerk --- in fact, where the SOFA Slippery-Dip™ is concerned, I'm quite willing to take on any position at all! ;)
As for the safety mechanism, it's quite simple. The stairs, that produce the downward angle that induces motion, simply align themselves to produce a flat surface instead, so that there is no more downward pull. (Think of how an escalator works as you near the end of the ride --- the stairs just collapse into themselves and the ride flattens out.)
Further questions may be directed to the SOFA Hotline at 1-800-SOFA-NOW, where I will be personally answering any and all inquiries.
--- sweetstuff,
SOFA administration team
Oldfart
05-13-2002, 05:34 PM
Scotzoidman
There is no need for a slow-down mechanism as the SOFA
has a 'Pubic Hair Switch(R)' which ejects a misaligned appendage
through the gag reflex.
nikanik
05-15-2002, 12:54 AM
Just how do you get on? Looks like too much fun to pass this ride up.
Oldfart
05-15-2002, 04:37 AM
Just like a horse, you can ride it facing forward or back.
Individual style is just that.
Scarecrow
10-20-2002, 04:02 PM
Is there any up-dates on the Slippery Dip?
Oldfart
10-24-2002, 06:35 AM
Waiting for Scotz to get back to me on a launch date.
Minor hitch with getting people off there who've been on
for over a week hogging the fun, but hoping Lilith'll come
up with a solution (so to speak).
scotzoidman
10-24-2002, 07:23 PM
Minor hitch, we can't get the people off the prototype long enough to disassemble it for shipping...still, science marches on...
Lovediva
10-24-2002, 10:23 PM
Ok.....WHO'S GOT THE WOODY??????
I just got a sliver................
Lilith
10-25-2002, 07:17 AM
Lilith strides in prepared to save the day>>>>>>>>>>>
"Ok guys, I will get them all off!".......lol...er I mean.............
Scarecrow
10-25-2002, 05:38 PM
Ok Lilith I'm ready for you to get me off lol
Scarecrow
05-03-2003, 09:07 PM
Here is the story of the Slippery Dip:D
Oldfart
05-04-2003, 07:42 AM
Mmmmmmmmmmm
It's SOFA time. lol
Lilith
05-04-2003, 01:07 PM
*kicks off her shoes and begins the long climb to the top*
OMG I love you guys!:D:D:p
I'm right behind you Lilith... ;) :p
SO-FA!
SO-FA!
SO-FA!
Lilith
07-09-2003, 01:00 PM
LOL I wanna ride down double Aqua, you can get behind me :o:D:p
Scarecrow
07-09-2003, 04:55 PM
:sex: weeeeeeeeeeeeeee
IAKaraokeGirl
07-09-2003, 04:57 PM
<----- gets in line behind scarecrow
Been a long time since I've taken a ride on the SOFA!
wyndhy
08-30-2005, 04:40 PM
<~~~~~has never had a ride on the sofa....pulls hair back, strips down and slathers oil all over.
Slide on down wyndhy... it's a helluva ride! :D
wyndhy
08-30-2005, 06:55 PM
yes, yes, yes, yes..........it was!
oldfart and scotz showed amazing acumen and aptitude. they have a real head for pleasure rides and grasped the desired outcum with penis, i mean genius.
i cummend all of you for your acumplishment. everyone involved was most certainly endowed with ass pounding….errr astounding…know-how, titnique, and cumpetence
:grin:
:rofl::rofl:
:grin:
wyndhy
08-30-2005, 07:12 PM
what? did i stutter?
i mean, i know there was that one penis screw-up, and...ok... i said ass-pounding instead of astounding, but i thought i made myself mostly clear :D
Mmmmmmmmmm, ass pounding.
Lilith
08-30-2005, 07:16 PM
crystal
crystal
No, Lil.. ya gotta say it like John Bender...
"Chrys-Tal" :p
Oldfart
08-31-2005, 04:40 AM
Aqua,
Was it you hiding the SOFA?
Glad you kept it in fine condition as wyndhy found it.
Hmmm, I need to talk to Scotz about that little optional extra. . . .
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